Wasted Years
by Mizerable
Summary: Had they known the paths their choices would lead them to, would they have changed anything? A bitter introspective about people learning what it means to live.
1. Ch 1: Hazy and Faded

(story revised as of 7/17/04) This was my first attempt at fan fiction and it's a divergent timeline. Spoilers through manga vol. 16. In this story, Naruto hasn't left to train with Jiraiya and Itachi/Akatsuki haven't come to the village yet. Also, please be aware that this story may possess scenes that might make the more sensitive of readers uncomfortable.

With thanks,

Mizerable

**Wasted Years**

by Mizerable

Ch. 1: Hazy and Faded

It was raining again. The aching in his bones signaled the weather before he'd even a chance to look. Even given the chance to sleep in a real bed for a change, his weary body was becoming less and less forgiving to its brutal treatment. Debating whether or not to rise just yet, he allowed his body an experimental stretch that served only to remind him how sore and stiff and fatigued he felt. More pertinent to the moment, his head was killing him again. The cause was most likely from attempts to drink away the bitter regrets that were killing him last night. If it wasn't one thing, it was another...Lying here in another unfamiliar room bathed in washed-out, gray light left him wonder to just how he ended up becoming such a mess in the first place.

How long had it been since he'd left, anyway? Three years? Five? After traveling thousands of miles and a million worlds removed, it certainly felt like he'd been gone for over a millennia's worth of time. Wherever he traveled, it always seemed to be a little colder than he ever remembered home being. And it always seemed to be raining.

He felt more drained than he had in quite some time. Arriving at whatever obscure village late last night after traveling for days and drinking until even later, it just hurt to get up today. More so than it had yesterday and even more so than the day before that and so on and so forth. So with full intention to just roll over and sleep off his fatigue and hangover, he silently cursed at what woke him up in the first place. Exhausted as he was, his body was desperately craving a nicotine fix. Smoking helped kill his appetite so he could deal without eating for longer periods, it kept him slightly warmer when camped out, it kept his frayed nerves from unraveling. But that, coupled with the exhaustion and the drinking, was proving to be a custom he shouldn't offer so much patronage to. Yet all were traditions that were becoming increasingly more traditional.

He lit up. After this, he'd get some more rest.

But the knock at his door said otherwise.

"Hey, Uchiha! Get your ass outta bed! We're moving out."

He watched the smoke lazily curl towards the ceiling, adding to the gray haziness the room was already drowning in. How had everything ended up like this?

* * *

Two years had come and gone but the chaos of Konoha tumbled along just the same. After the death of the Third Hokage, a permanent replacement had yet to be elected. Jiraiya had begrudgingly taken on an interim role but refused to extend it past that. He wanted to keep the village from completely crumbling but lacked interest in taking on the complete and total responsibility the title of Hokage entailed. A search had been made for Tsunade so that she could take the position, though she had no desire to be found and the results were therefore fruitless. The village recognized how vulnerable they must seem to the outside. It was a dangerous situation to float about in, so its shinobi were made to train more intensely than ever before to make up for the deficit.

"I…don't think he's going to show up," Sakura murmured, her voice lost in the thrum of raindrops. She rubbed her arms in a nervous gesture disguised as an attempt to keep herself warm and dry beneath a leafy tree. "Ah, you know him. Mr. Perfect's too good to come out and play in the rain," Naruto grumbled coolly, idly nailing falling leaves to tree trunks with his shuriken. Or at least it was what he tried to do, as his aim was far from standard just as his voice lacked its sarcastic edge. He never was good at hiding his emotions. "Kakashi-sensei?" Sakura turned her eyes to her teacher, hoping he had any ideas.

"Hmm?" Kakashi had his trusty book out and seemed to be rather absorbed. Or rather, that's what he wanted to convince the other two of. He was very aware of the absence. More importantly, he was noticing the habit. And he did not like what he was seeing. While it was likely his other students had a vague impression that something wasn't right, he doubted they noticed just how serious things were becoming with their teammate. With a sigh, the book was closed and slipped back into his pocket. "Alright, let's call it a day."

"But, Senseeeee—" Naruto whined. Just because _some_ people don't show up to train anymore shouldn't mean he had to miss out, too!

"It's already late afternoon and pouring again. A big part of the day's been lost so it's senseless to get started now. You should go home and rest up a bit so you don't get a cold from the weather." Even with the mask, Kakashi offered what could be interpreted as a warm smile. They would certainly never know it was strained. After much glaring and griping, Naruto finally conceded. But, of course, not before adding how he'd go try to weasel free ramen out of Iruka-sensei. So off he went and Kakashi decided it was time he departed as well. There was someone he needed to speak to about their multiple absences. But he paused after noticing Sakura was rather rooted in place.

"Aren't you going home? A nice hot cup of tea should life your spirits." Kakashi knew this wasn't going to be easy. While Naruto knew something was wrong, he dealt with it by being grumpy and would take out all his confusion in training. Sakura was different. She—

"Sensei…I've never once been to his house," she began and Kakashi already didn't like where this was leading, "Could you—Would you—Can you show me where it is?" Despite his better judgment, considering what the reaction from the owner of the house would be, he couldn't help but agree to her request.

* * *

After all the debating, tossing, and turning, he gave into the incessant pounding at his door. It was rare for anyone to visit and even rarer for anyone to be so persistent in their efforts when they did. Opening the door, he didn't find himself too surprised when he discovered Kakashi waiting on the other side. Nor was he surprised that his teacher did not seem pleased with him. "It sure is raining hard out today," Kakashi stated casually, "Can't blame you for not coming out in it, though would you be so kind as to invite us in?" The sarcasm was not lost on him, though he was puzzled by one thing said. " 'Us'?" he remarked coolly. And, lo and behold, Sakura popped out from her hiding place behind Kakashi. "I brought you some soup—I figured you mustn't be feeling well, Sasuke-kun…"

He really felt like snorting at her in irritation at that moment. If her antics and "infatuation" weren't enough of a bother, it was even weirder for her to suddenly become as timid as the Hyuga girl. But since he could bet Kakashi had one hell of a lecture for him, he kept his mouth shut and opened the door a little wider for them to enter. Kakashi said nothing as he entered, using Sakura's attempt to give Sasuke the soup as a distraction to do a quick assessment of the boy. He'd most likely just woken up when they knocked, still in his bed clothes that hung from a body becoming increasingly skinnier. The heavy rings under his eyes suggested an exaggerated lack of sleep, though. Kakashi could pick out several scrapes and bruises that certainly hadn't been earned the last time he'd decided to grace them with his presence in training, including a couple of questionable cuts on his arms. No, he definitely did not like how this was going.

"Sasuke, I'd like a word with you." Best to just get this over with. That's what he kept telling himself. "I'm sure you won't mind if Sakura makes herself comfortable here, right?" Sasuke said nothing and just followed after Kakashi, leaving Sakura standing alone at the door with a cooling thermos of soup in her hands.

"I'm not pleased what's been happening here lately. I'm sure you know that," Kakashi said bluntly and Sasuke chose not to defend himself. Better to just let his teacher get it out of his system. "It's also come to my attention that whatever training you're doing to make up for the time you spend missing ours is anything but helpful. Do you mind explaining what's been going on?"

"The curse seal," Sasuke answered flatly, "I don't wanna be bothered by the other two about it during training so…" Kakashi paused a moment and realized he shouldn't have been as surprised as he was. Of course Sasuke wouldn't want to get too involved at practice and have it activate. "Ah, so that's why you hold back so much when all of you train together…And those?" He gestured vaguely at the marks on Sasuke's arms

"I gotta snap myself out of it one way or another."

This really was not going well. Sasuke was such a promising ninja, yet here he was completely falling apart at the grand age of fourteen. So consumed with revenge and regrets to begin with, Kakashi _almost_ wished Orochimaru's curse had killed the boy immediately rather than drag out his inevitable collapse. This was painful to witness. "Why are you doing this to yourself?" Kakashi finally asked, "Why train to the point that the seal even activates? It could kill you." Silence was an unwelcomed guest that kept its stay for an extended amount of time.

"That man—My brother was the Anbu captain when he was thirteen…I'm not even a jounin yet," Sasuke admitted, eyes lowered, "I can't do anything at the level I'm at now. I can't even keep up with that dead-last idiot anymore. There's no way I'm just going to sit back and fall further behind."

"And then what? Say you do manage to kill Itachi, what will even be left of you in the end?" Sasuke gave a noncommittal shrug in response

"If and when you do fight your brother, with the way you are, you'll probably die in the process…"

"Probably," Sasuke answered, head bowed, "But as long as he's dead, too…."

With all of his training and all of his knowledge, Kakashi could think of nothing to comfort his student. There was such an agony locked within Sasuke, such an emptiness, that nothing could soothe it away. Sasuke finally raised hardened eyes to his teacher. "Are you finished?"

Kakashi nodded vaguely. He just couldn't reach him, not like this. "I do expect you to show up for practice tomorrow. And show up well-rested." There was nothing he could do. Sasuke seemed only to respond at all when demands for training were made. Returning to the front door, Kakashi was startled to find Sakura still waiting there. "I don't know your house at all so I didn't want to snoop…" With a sigh, Kakashi slipped his shoes on and prepared to exit. Maybe she could—

"Oh, and Sasuke? Be a gentleman and let Sakura stay here for a while this evening. It's such nasty weather, and all." Before Sasuke could argue at all, Kakashi had already departed.

The two stared at each other, Sakura looking completely surprised and Sasuke indifferent as always. "Whatever…" he muttered before turning away. He did glance back to watch her putting on her shoes and open the door. He hadn't expected her to leave him, considering her obsessive nature when it came to him. But more importantly, he hadn't expected her to leave after Kakashi made it pretty clear he expected her to stay.

"I know you don't want me here," her voice barely came out above a whisper, "And we didn't train much today so I'll just go home to—" Sakura froze when a hand gripped her wrist tightly.

"Train here. It doesn't matter," he stated gruffly and all but yanked her back inside.

"Sasuke-kun…" she murmured before trailing after him.

And so he let her train with him, more or less. He wasn't paying much, if any, attention to her but that was fine. Sakura wanted more than anything to just stay by his side, a task that was becoming increasingly difficult with each passing day. He just kept fading further and further away; so much so that she could barely see him anymore in the person with her right now. Where had her Sasuke gone? In this large home with no one but himself to greet him, it seemed the emptiness was swallowing him whole.

Sakura was snapped out of her revelry when she heard a pained gasp followed by a thud. "Sasuke-kun!" She rushed to his side while he lay crumpled on the floor. Shock crossed her features while she watched the curse seal cross his. "What have you done to yourself?" she whispered, feeling tears prickling her eyes. Sasuke gripped onto a kunai with a trembling hand, about to "snap himself out of it" but Sakura managed to hold his arm back. "Sasuke-kun, don't! Please don't hurt yourself!" She froze as he glared at her through Sharingan eyes filled with a madness she'd grown to fear since the first time she witnessed him like this. In a flash, she found herself thrown against the wall with a wrist pinned by Sasuke's hand.

He could hear the blood pulsing. Was it his or Sakura's…? He couldn't tell…The curse brought out an ugliness that he wasn't able to control. Didn't she realize that by now? This is why he could no longer train with anyone but himself. With Naruto there, he became too desperate to catch up. He couldn't train far from his home, should he be unable to gain control over himself. And in this house, he was reminded more tangibly of everything he lost. This curse was going to eat him alive with all his hatred and bitterness adding more fuel to the fire. And yet she—

"Get…Out," He managed to growl out. Sasuke knew he was losing his grip on himself and it wasn't safe for Sakura if she stayed. He had no interest in getting involved with Sakura, or anyone. But he was human and this curse certainly reminded him of the body's human urges. God knows what he'd do in this state…Sakura looked positively terrified. So why wasn't she making any effort to leave?

Sasuke could feel the tremendous pain burning throughout his body as he made a last ditch attempt at getting a hold of himself. Damn it… "Sasuke-kun…?" Sakura reached with her free hand to gently touch his arm. Why hadn't she noticed? Why hadn't she seen that the curse had been slowly taking her Sasuke away over the past years?

She heard him mutter a curse and that was the only warning she received before his mouth was pressed hard against hers. Her eyes widened in disbelief and it took a great deal of time for her to realize he was actually kissing her. Finally coming to her senses, all she could think was: _Not like this_.

Sakura wanted to be kissed by Sasuke for as long as she could remember. But he wasn't in control of himself now. She knew how much the curse altered his personality. No matter how much she wanted it, the real Sasuke would never kiss her.

So she tried to fight back, to shove him away. But he had always been stronger, regardless of the curse. She opened her mouth to shout in protest, only to have his hot tongue find his way inside and all her words were swallowed. Her muffled sounds and struggling seemed only so excite him further as he deepened the kiss and began to grind against her, as if trying to feel her all at once. If she questioned his desire at all, she could feel the evidence pressing against her thigh now. Try as she might, she couldn't help but gasp. She couldn't deny how good this felt, and that's why it hurt so much to know she had to stop him. He didn't want this and she knew it.

Her lips now freed while he began to kiss her jaw line, she could finally voice her thoughts. "Sasuke-kun, please stop!" His hand found the zipper of her red dress and was in a hurry to yank it open. "I know you don't want to do this! Sasuke-kun! Plea--aahhh" He began to suckle on her neck while his hand cupped her breast. She was so ashamed of herself. Why couldn't she be strong and fight him off? Why did this being have to wear Sasuke's face? The tears were streaming freely now as she thought of how much Sasuke would hate her when it was all over. Her wrist was still firmly pressed against the wall and all she could manage was to wiggle her fingers a bit. He was too strong and she was too weak and—

"Sakura…" he murmured in her ear. His grip was no longer overpowering and as he began to sink to the floor, she realized the curse had receded. Falling to the ground, Sakura could only murmur apologizes through her tears as she held his unconscious form.

* * *

God, it hurt. Though having no recollection of even going to bed last night, he woke to a drilling headache and an aching body. What happened yesterday? The last thing he could recall was training. Kakashi had left Sakura with him—_Sakura!!_

He shot up in bed, surprised when a wet cloth fell from his forehead to his lap. Wide-eyed and confused, he looked around wildly and found a startled Sakura kneeling next to his futon. "Sasuke-kun, do you feel bet—"

"Are you okay?" he immediately asked, "Were you injured at all? Did I--?" Sakura was too stunned to answer all the questions asked in rapid succession, even after he cut himself off. It was a rare occasion for Sasuke to blatantly show his worries so outwardly. "I—I'm fine, Sasuke-kun. You didn't hurt me." That answer was all Sasuke needed to withdraw in on himself, his cold mask slipping back on his face. The rain rattling against the roof filled in the blanks of their silent conversation that rambled on at a slow, steady pace.

"It wasn't your fault," Sakura finally spoke softly and to this he visibly flinched, "This is why you've been avoiding us, isn't it…"

"I don't want anyone to see me when I'm like that," Sasuke mumbled, "You don't know what I'm capable of…the horrible things I…" He trailed off when Sakura took his hand. "I still believe in you. We all do," she whispered, "Please come back to us, Sasuke-kun. Even Naruto misses you." He couldn't help but let a bitter smile tug at his lips. That complete idiot worried about everyone, friend or enemy.

The tension within the room lessened ever so slightly, allowing Sasuke to find his nerve. He had to clear things up right here and now. "Sakura, you need to understand something," he spoke gravely and held her absolute attention, "What happened back there…You know I wouldn't…." He just couldn't say it. He wasn't one to be afraid of something like this, but the words just wouldn't come out of his mouth.

"Of course I know you wouldn't…force yourself on me. It was the stupid curse seal that made you…." Sakura couldn't finish her sentence, either. She was too busy attempting to ignore the cheers of Inner Sakura, who more than enjoyed the feeling of Sasuke's hand in hers. Try as she might, she couldn't get the incident out of her mind. His body had been so close and intimate with hers…Just the thought of it made her whole body flush. And that was more than enough to add to her rising guilt. It hadn't really been Sasuke. How could she be so foolish?

None of this escaped Sasuke's observations, either. Curse seal or not, he couldn't forget her squirming against him or the gasps she tried to hide or how hard she tried not to give into him despite how much pleasure she felt. "I know you liked a lot of what happened there," Sasuke noted the shock, shame, and anger cross her features. As she prepared to deny that accusation, he continued. "You should know by now that I'm not really interested in having a relationship with anyone. There are things in my life that, more than anything, I must complete. Everything else will get in my way. So don't expect anything like that to happen for real--"

"I know," Sakura replied, "I know how important avenging your clan is to you…"

"Then we have nothing left to discuss." Sakura remained silent by his side, her gaze focused completely on the tatami mat. With a heavy sigh, she finally rose to her feet. "It's late so I'm gonna go home. I'll see you at practice tomorrow, okay?" Sasuke knew it was obviously what she should do. She needed to get out of here, probably to sort things out so she could even have the nerve to see him again. Things between the team were strained enough and that could cause serious problems on a mission. But he rashly said what came to mind anyway.

"Stay."

Sakura blinked rapidly in confusion while Inner Sakura applauded the idea. "Sasuke-kun?"

"It's late and it's still raining. Just stay here tonight." This was a completely stupid idea, he realized, but Sakura was so damn fragile. He had to put some sort of confidence in her or she'd very likely wind up dead on their next mission. Hopefully she wouldn't get the wrong idea.

Either way, this plan seemed to have her more than a little nervous as she was wringing her hands together. He also was able to notice how bruised her one wrist was. "So I did injure you," he realized aloud.

"Huh?…Oh, this? It doesn't hurt. Really," Sakura was lying and they both knew it. Despite Inner Sakura enjoying the basic idea of having been so close to Sasuke that night, even that part had been just as completely terrified as the rest of her. She was trying to be strong through all this but it was late and her resolve was failing. Sasuke knew he made a horrible mess of things. Putting aside how they were towards each other, if Kakashi found out he might receive severe punishment. He may have hinted to his teacher that the curse still acted up but if he knew how little his control was over it, he could be forced to quit his life as a shinobi.

"I'll prepare the guest room for you." God, he shouldn't be doing this. Sakura hesitantly approached his futon, "Can I—Can I stay here with you?" She squeaked out. Sasuke was absolutely stunned. How could this girl still want to be near him? After what he did, how could—

"Aa," he answered despite his thoughts eating away at him. That was definitely the wrong decision… Slowly, she knelt down and curled up beside him. Her hands were shaking, though he pretended not to notice. No need to embarrass her further. Despite feeling it would be difficult to find sleep that night with all the confusion and hurt filling their hearts, both dropped off into slumber with backs staring at each other.

For reasons unknown to them, neither felt surprised that they awakened wrapped up in each other's arms. Sakura snuggled closer, knowing after they moved this would never ever happen again. Sasuke, feeling drained as he always did in the morning, let her indulge while his body adjusted to consciousness

Lying in silence for an extended stretch of time, Sasuke was the first to pull away. Now sitting, he chose not to face her as he spoke. "Don't tell anyone what happened last night. If they find out about the curse seal, I'm finished." He knew she didn't like it but he hadn't expected her to. She chose not to say anything. In his own way, he told her that he didn't dislike her. It was far from being any semblance of affection but the thought was comforting in its own right.

* * *

Naruto showed up well after they arrived and couldn't hide his relief to see Sasuke there before he set his face into a scowl and tossed out a string of insults about how much of a slacker a "genius" could be. He was promptly stomped on by Sakura. Once Kakashi showed up in his timely fashion, Team Seven went to work. He made note of Sakura's bruised wrist but chose not to pursue any questions, as his team seemed relaxed for a change. Well, as relaxed as was normal for them these days.

Beneath the gray-faded sky, it was a successful training session.

To be continued…


	2. Ch 2: You Don't See Me

**Wasted Years**

by Mizerable

Ch. 2: You Don't See Me

Weeks passed and Sakura kept her promise. She said nothing and did nothing that could have hinted something occurred between herself and Sasuke. No one asked anything so she hoped no one was suspicious. Or if they were, at least they didn't let her know.

Practice wrapped up for the day and she was more than happy that it was over. They'd really been training hard lately. But the double-edged sword of leaving meant departing from Sasuke. She always worried what happened when no one was around, what the curse was doing to his body and spirit. "S-Sasuke-kun?" she approached, feeling unnaturally shy, "Do you want to go have dinner together?" He glanced over at her and quietly declined before looking away. Moments later Naruto was pawing at her hand, practically begging her to go have ramen with him. Sakura was about to give him the usual rejection, but paused. She had an idea.

"Actually, why don't the three of us go?"

The two boys both looked at her with varying levels of shock, meaning Naruto had enough surprise written across his face for the both of them. "What?! With the human ice cube??"

"We…We never eat together, all of us. I just thought…." Sakura trailed off. This was dumb of her. Of course they wouldn't like the idea. Sasuke hated being around anyone and Naruto hated being around Sasuke. "Oh, I'm being silly. Just forget—"

"I'll go," Sasuke stated nonchalantly.

"Eh?" Sakura was stunned. He'd actually agreed! Naruto, on the other hand, was so flustered that he had to call after the others to wait for him since they started off towards Ichiraku while he remained frozen in place.

Even after being seated at the counter, Sakura could tell the boys on either side of her were both rather tense during this outing. She was suddenly feeling very foolish for trying to make this work. Sasuke may have been showing up to train, but she knew he was always a million miles away from everyone. The hurt he felt day in and day out kept him from wanting to come anywhere near his reality. So it was time for her to work some magic. It would be nearly impossible to get Sasuke to open up but getting Naruto to talk about _anything_ was a simple task. So she brought up what techniques they'd been working on lately and off he went on a nearly incomprehensible tangent.

Ah, that felt better.

She was still hard on Naruto a lot of the time, but it was more out of habit than anything else. She had grown fond of having the village's number one loudest ninja around. With his silly grin and wide, excitable blue eyes, Naruto really had become quite an adorable fellow. And strong! She'd never been the strength of the team so it wasn't a surprise that he'd become much more powerful than her when they were genin. But now that Sasuke was in the state he was in now, Naruto was easily the strongest of their team. But he probably didn't even realize it. Since Sasuke still saw Naruto as a rival, he felt like Sasuke was still his. He just couldn't believe that he'd surpassed the "Uchiha genius." But it was because he was so naïve about everything, he couldn't put his finger on why Sasuke "wasn't fun to spar with anymore." He couldn't, or wouldn't, see how deep into despair his rival had fallen.

So while Naruto rambled on about whatever popped into his mind, Sakura took note of how little Sasuke was eating of his dinner. The poor thing-- "Na, Sasuke, if you're not gonna eat that, can I have it?" Naruto suddenly inquired. Sasuke raised his eyes towards Naruto's direction before pushing the bowl towards the other boy. Naruto's eyes shifted from the bowl to Sasuke to the bowl again in utter shock, complete with a little nervous laugh. "I was kinda joking…" Naruto replied sheepishly.

"Do whatever you want," Sasuke answered coolly and stood up, evidently departing. As he dropped some money on the counter, Sakura caught his hand. "Please stay," she spoke softly, "Just for a little while longer?" Another bitter smirk cracked along his lips.

_Like you'd let me do otherwise._

He hesitantly sat back down, his hand still in Sakura's against the countertop. He was tempted to just yank it away but the girl looked like she was about to launch into a hysterical crying fit. She'd been looking like that a lot these days and he didn't feel at all like hearing it right now.

And Naruto looked just plain puzzled. The longer he knew Sasuke, the weirder he got. He was such an unhappy guy, yet he never wanted anyone around. From his own experience, Naruto always felt better having people there to make the sadness and the loneliness go away. But nope, not Sasuke. _He_ didn't need anyone. _He_ didn't need to train. _He_ didn't need to eat. _He_ didn't need Sakura-chan's love.

_Sakura-chan…_

He'd never kept it a secret that he liked her. In fact, spending so much time around her over the last couple years only made him love her more. She was just such a wonderful girl who, even though she could be cold to him a lot, still let him stay in her life. Two years ago, she'd never say yes to dinner with him. But even if she brought Sasuke along, she had talked to him. To _Naruto_! And she didn't seem unhappy with that. Sure, she was still preoccupied with Sasuke and….well, she'd probably always be preoccupied with Sasuke.

Naruto wasn't as stupid as people thought him to be. He was hopelessly chasing Sakura just as she was hopelessly chasing Sasuke just as Sasuke was hopelessly chasing his ambitions. Well, Sasuke was the only one with a probable success rate. Maybe. Like he said, the guy just kept getting stranger. For example, the Sasuke who always claimed he didn't need anyone was sitting there holding Sakura's hand. In public! But Naruto could tell by the look on Sasuke's face that he barely even noticed he _had_ hands. But that wasn't all that knew. He was always out of it when they trained; not at all sharp like he used to be.

Naruto never really noticed at first when Sasuke began to change. It was a gradual kind of thing that, after seeing someone everyday for the last couple years, you just wake up one day and ask: was this the same guy I knew back then?

Naruto didn't have an answer to that one.

He was distracted from his thoughts by a very loud, very feminine laugh. Only one person he knew sounded like that. And that would be one Yamanaka Ino.

"Well, if it isn't Forehead Girl!"

"Well, if it isn't Ino-pig!"

Naruto shuddered at this. Girls sure could be scary.

It looked like the girls were about to get into their usual squabble before Ino's eyes locked onto Sasuke's hand in Sakura's. And she was about to ask Sasuke about it but chose not to. She hadn't seen Sasuke in a while so she was surprised to see how…troubled he looked. He'd lost a lot of weight since the last time she'd seen him. "How have you been, Sasuke-kun?" Ino asked, sounding rather serious, "I haven't seen you around lately." He shrugged and that was all she could get out of him. God, this was the top rookie from her class? He'd always been the silent type, but now…

Naruto then realized Shikamaru was standing off to the side. He'd been so damn quiet, he didn't even notice he was there. Guess it wasn't too shocking that I guy like that "blended in with the shadows," so to speak. But Shikamaru didn't seem to notice anyone either. His eyes were focused on Ino, his jaw set tight so it seemed he was pissed about something.

And he _was_ pissed. Shikamaru had been spending the last couple years so close to Ino and he really felt like she was close to him. Right up until Sasuke showed up. Then it was like he didn't exist in her world. For Ino, all she could see was Sasuke. With her so set on one guy, it was just plain pointless to try and go after her. No sense wasting his time there. He'd never get Ino to be interested in him.

Whether she noticed Shikamaru's frustration or not, Ino decided to suggest a little idea to Team Seven. "We're supposed to meet up with Chouji at the teahouse…why don't all of us go?"

"Don't you mean, 'why don't you come with me, Sasuke'?" Naruto couldn't help but be cynical. He was never close to any of these people and they were rarely, if ever, kind to him.

Ino wanted to go into her usual speech about how, of course, she only wanted Sasuke there. But a lot had changed since they attended the Academy together. The "cool" guy all the girls thought Sasuke to be was obviously suffering from something she couldn't even name. Sure, it was still fun to annoy Sakura about their goal to "catch Sasuke" but somewhere all the line that's all it became. A joke. Add that with an inability to swallow her pride and Ino's rivalry with Sakura could seem real to the outside observer. Only Ino knew that she'd stopped trying to win Sasuke's heart a long time ago.

After all, that day in the Forest of Death when Ino saw Sasuke covered in those strange markings, she knew she couldn't be with him. Whatever drove him to that state was something she was fairly certain she couldn't handle. But Sakura….She could reach him. She could save him. Even if they didn't see it, Ino knew Sasuke needed Sakura in his life more than anyone else. Sakura was the only voice he could hear.

Sakura, whom she helped find a voice.

And then there was Naruto, an obnoxious little punk that just made everything a little more interesting when he was around. Her parents always were wary of him and so she was, too. But over the years, she could only see him as another shinobi and a useful one at that. So Team Seven was good in her book.

"No, I mean _all_ of you. If I just wanted Sasuke-kun, I would have only asked him," Ino replied in her usual haughty fashion, "Idiot." Naruto looked like he was going to explode after being insulted, but his goofy grin spread across his face instead. He was being included.

Sakura looked to Sasuke with a hopeful expression on her face. He'd really planned to get out of here so he could get some more training in. But with all these people staring at him, he felt uncharacteristically uncomfortable. So he vaguely gave an affirmative response and off they went to the teahouse.

Upon arriving and spotting Chouji, the group was surprised to find Team Eight there, as well. "Well looks like the gang's all here," Kiba announced, with an excited response from Akamaru. So everyone greeted each other and started catching up on things. "H—hi, Naruto-kun…" Hinata managed, her cheeks already flushed.

"Hmm? Oh, hey," he answered. She was so soft-spoken, he'd barely heard her above the others. Funny, everyone kept saying she wasn't as shy as she used to be but it sure seemed like she was whenever Naruto ran into her. Weird.

So now the three teams laid claim to a large table together all while having a pretty decent time. It was rare that any of them would ever seen anyone outside of their own group, since their training and missions kept them more than occupied. Since they were all being loud and generally tiring (especially Naruto and Kiba), Shikamaru decided to waste his time just making a note of how much people changed. Shino seemed about the same, still the quiet standoff-ish type. Kiba was still loud, though he apparently developed a habit of making subtle passes at Hinata. She, of course, would just blush a lot. They were a bit cuddly so maybe they were a thing? Not that he cared. Seeing Team Seven earlier let him see Naruto was _slightly_ less high-strung, Sakura still doting over Sasuke, and Sasuke…There was something different about him. He always seemed like the real arrogant type, even if he was always pretty silent about it. Now the whole brooding act made him think the guy had some serious life issues to work out. What the hell did Ino see in such a depressing guy—

Ino, who'd been standing behind him goofing around, chose now to be a good time to throw her arms around his neck. She was apparently entertained by whatever conversation was going on at the table and just wanted to lean in to add her two cents. But Shikamaru didn't really notice. All he knew was how close she was, with her scent lingering around him and her breasts pressed against his back and her voice near his ear. This girl was positively _evil_! It was really a shame that he had less than a chance with her. It might have been nice. What a pain…

"Hey," Naruto leaned over to Sakura, "Does Ino like Shikamaru now or something?" It was strange to see a girl pay attention to anyone not-Sasuke. She felt a laugh wanting to escape. "I guess she knew she couldn't win against me." Naruto gave his standard foxy grin. It was always nice to hear Sakura act like her old confident self. That gloomy bastard Sasuke made her all gloomy, too. "And is Kiba flirting with Hinata as much as I think he is?" she asked in a hushed tone.

"Wha--? No way!" Naruto replied in a very Naruto-ish fashion. He may have noticed something obvious like Ino hanging all over Shikamaru, but anything other than that was beyond Naruto's grasp. All eyes were now on him and, thus, the return of the nervous laugh. Conversation resumed.

They were all so relaxed and happy and he wanted to be anywhere but here. No matter how much he should probably be enjoying the moment, none of the emotion could reach him. Maybe she sensed his distress, because Sakura's fingers wove around his under the table where no one could see. These small touches were going to his head and he really wanted to pull away. He still had his guilt from the incident a few weeks ago but she still craved his touch. He kind of wanted to laugh about things, really. When the curse had control of him while Sakura was there, he'd been anything but gentle with her. What he'd done to her had been rough, almost violent, and she still wanted to be near him. Maybe the girl wasn't as fragile as he thought since some part of her enjoyed it rough--He needed to stop this train of thought right now. He could feel his skin begin to burn and that only meant one thing: the curse seal.

A thousand times over Sasuke had reiterated his lack of interest in being in a relationship. He knew he was human and lust was normal enough but it could be easily ignored. It would only take away from his mission. But the damn curse pulled all these unfamiliar urges from deep within him; a dark place that he had no intention of exploring. Damn it, he wasn't even training or straining himself but the curse was activating. What the hell had he done to deserve this? He tightly squeezed her hand and heard her gasp softly in surprise. Her thumb moved in soothing circles over his skin and he tried to focus on that to see through the haze the pain and darkness left him in. He was losing control though…

She'd rested their joined hands in her lap, glancing over at him with her worry carefully masked as to not alert anyone else. The grip he held her hand in seemed rather painful for her but she was too foolish to say anything. Why was she always so damn stubborn?

He had to get out of here, no matter what she thought right now. No matter what any of them thought. It was strange, almost like sitting outside his own body watching himself move. He could see his hand move yet he couldn't stop it no matter how many times his brain screamed "no." His fingers brushed against her thigh but she kept looking forward. But he could tell by the look in her eyes she knew damn well what was going on. She knew he'd lost control. And still she just kept her damn mouth shut. And she _loved_ him? For treating her like some goddamn whore? His hand slid easily against her inner thigh and she bit her bottom lip. She was nervous now. Her eyes darted around and realized everyone was so preoccupied that no one could see. In a way she was very grateful. She didn't want to explain this to the group. She didn't want to embarrass Sasuke by letting everyone know he was losing his mind.

Sakura got all tense, Naruto realized. He didn't remember anything being said that could have gotten her mad or upset. What could have happ—Sasuke's was feeling her leg. WTF?! He was about to go off on the jerk until he saw Sasuke's expression. He definitely was making that face he always made when he tried to hide that he was in pain. Was he okay? Sasuke and Naruto made eye contact and Naruto didn't miss the message being conveyed: _Somebody kill me..._

"What are those marks on your neck?" Shino suddenly asked. Sasuke slapped a hand over what was very obviously the curse seal spreading. "That's—" Ino couldn't forget the way those markings looked. Sasuke then hurried out of the booth without any sort of explanation. Sakura called after him before taking off to catch up with him. "N-Naruto-kun…wh-what's wrong with S-Sasuke-kun?" Hinata squeaked out. Naruto just shook his head, a stunned expression on his face.

* * *

With everything that had happened since he left, he'd completely forgotten about the teahouse incident. Considering what it led to, it amazed him that it had been lost in the myriad of chaos that it preceded. But a smack on the back of the head refused to let him pursue the memory further. "Quit daydreaming, Uchiha. Next time ya just might lose your head."

"Yes, ma'am," he replied curtly.

"Oh, don't go 'yes ma'am'-ing me. I don't wanna hear none of it," she snapped. She, being his captain. Or, that was at least one title he could attach to her. He absently mused he could probably call her Yanagi, her name. Standing at nearly his own height, she possessed a slight, fragile-looking frame that probably wouldn't suffer from having a little more meat on its bones. Wisps of pale sea foam green hair fell loosely into her face from a hastily made ponytail drawn at her nape. Just as well, anyway. It almost made him think her to be the delicate type. As she released an agitated sigh to blow the strands from her vision, the scar running down her bottom lip to the mid of her chin came into view. Also got a nice view of her hardened indigo eyes. Ah, she looked pissed today. What a surprise…

" 'the hell you starin' at, boy?" she growled at him. He didn't answer and turned his sights forward. To this day, he was amazed he'd fallen into company with the likes of her. If asked to describe her, one might answer Yanagi was a hard drinking, hard-boiled, low-class bitch of a woman. And, in a way, much of it would be right. Right now, Sasuke knew the flask in her back pocket was always stocked full of strong whiskey. In the other pocket was a pack of strong cigarettes, her other favorite poison. Comfortably loaded to the brim with weapons; some concealed, some less so. And she had a hard mouth on her just to add to the effect. You'd almost feel bad for the guys on the wrong end of her interrogations. But as long as she wasn't interrogating you, it was somewhat awe-inspiring to watch her work.

"Uchiha, what the hell you thinkin' about?" Yanagi snapped him out of his thoughts again, "Thought I told you not to space out."

"Sorry…I was thinking about you—" Sasuke's mouth snapped shut. He'd said too much. Yanagi raised a fine eyebrow to this. "They good thoughts?" she inquired coolly. She'd bite off her own tongue before flat out saying she was interested in his response.

"Nice as they can be when it comes to you," Sasuke retorted and she cracked the tiniest hint of a smile, which softened into something more genuine.

"You sure know how to romance a girl," she teased, earning an eye roll from him, "C'mon kid, stay focused. We got a lotta work to get through today." She gave his arm an encouraging squeeze before setting her stride at a quicker pace. She was a hardened woman, having his age and two years to her life. Beneath her clothes rested more than just the one lip scar. She was battle-weary and tired of a lot of things. But she'd taken him under her wing when he'd had nothing even to his name, let alone anything to give her. And so she became all he had and all he could go home to, though she herself had no home to call her own.

She'd asked once if he'd ever take her to see Konoha, a village that had several strong ninja she was interested in observing. She's been so ecstatic to hear he'd trained under the famous "Copy-Ninja Kakashi." And to hear her really interested in anything made her voice sound a little sweeter, her eyes a little softer.

Of course, he flat-out refused her. He would never be returning to Konoha. Not after….

* * *

He really didn't want to train today. He could barely even bat away the hand that was trying to roll him onto his back. Obviously he wasn't up for any kind of movement so why couldn't they just let him sleep it off? After a little rest, he was positive he could have a productive training session.

"This is not good."

The person prodding at him was the owner of this statement. It was a feminine voice, but didn't belong to any of the squealing girls he'd attended the Academy with. It was a richer, harder voice. Most likely a woman older than the girls he knew. His eyes had no interest in confirming the identity, since he knew it would annoy him either way. At least it wasn't Sakura. After bawling and pounding on his door for nearly two hours, she must have finally gotten the message that he wasn't going to let her in. He'd slumped to the floor inside his home and hadn't budged an inch since then. Even if he wanted to throw open the door just to tell her to shut up, it was beyond his physical capabilities at the time.

"I figured as much. Thank you for coming on such short notice," a slightly muffled, lazy drawl gave a reply. So Kakashi-sensei was here, too…

"It made _my_ seal react so I knew something serious must have happened."

_Her_ seal? …Anko?

Now lying on his back, the two jounin had a better view of the boy in question. The seal had faded but its damage was done. Through squinted, bleary eyes, Sasuke was attempting to look at them but his vision couldn't stay in focus for more than thirty seconds. A trail of crimson had at some point leaked down his chin during the night, accompanying the generous puddle of blood that had long since dried on the tatami.

"He needs medical treatment. We should hurry to the hospital," Anko spoke up.

The hospital again? He was fine…he just needed some rest and training could resume. He _had_ to train. Didn't they understand? Didn't they know he had to prepare to face Itachi?

"Aa," Kakashi gave his vague consent to the plan, followed by a heavy sigh before gathering Sasuke into his arms.

"You shouldn't blame yourself for any of this. What Orochimaru did to him…only Sasuke-kun can fight this battle. Nothing you could have done would have changed things. It's not up to anyone but him," Anko stated bluntly.

"No, I couldn't have fixed this…It's last night that I had the power to prevent," Kakashi answered gravely and Anko blanched at that.

Last night? Sure, he'd had another episode with the curse seal…Sakura. Everything must have come out about what he'd done to her those few weeks ago, since all those witnesses probably caught onto what was going on at the teahouse. So she caved and spilled about the incident…

Good girl, maybe now she'll stay away. Whatever would become of them, being near each other was sure to only bring out the most hideous in both himself and Sakura. Perhaps now she could understand that she never loved him and never would.

So into his realm of solitude and inky black security he retreated.

To be continued…

Yanagi - This is the Japanese name for "Willow." For anyone who was unaware, Sakura means "Cherry Blossom"


	3. Ch 3: You Stole My

**Wasted Years**

by Mizerable

Ch. 3: You stole my…

Kakashi watched with morbid fascination as the lines dancing without rhythm. He took a moment to glance away when a sigh of bleak dissatisfaction reached his ear. "I won't lie and say he'll be fine. Uchiha-kun is in bad shape," the doctor declared grimly, "His heartbeat is completely erratic…Both his body and mind have entered a dangerous place."

"I see," Kakashi replied gruffly. What else could he say to that? The distorted lines of the heart monitor spoke in tongues of hard-lined truth for him.

"The only way he's going to recover at all is to avoid overtaxing his body. It may be in his best interest to retire from the life of a shinobi." Kakashi had expected as much but he could tell the doctor didn't want to say it. The doctor was a man who wished these kids had a chance to get out in the real world and truly live, rather than be half way to the grave after barely entering their teen years. And so he left without saying another word. Words didn't fix people.

"It would help if the kid didn't have that damn seal," Anko muttered, her hand absently tracing over the spot hers would be, if surfaced.

"Do you suppose Orochimaru plans on returning now, two years later?" Kakashi pondered aloud, though he didn't sound convinced that this was Orochimaru's doing.

"He's not here," Anko nearly snapped, "I would have felt it…plus I'd have a lot of dead Anbu on my hands. Everyone's working triple-time to make sure he doesn't show, but…."

"But last night did happen," Kakashi finished for her, "Sasuke's body must be unconsciously reacting."

"You're assuming that he didn't--"

"Kakashi-san?" a nurse appeared at the door, "She's awake." Kakashi gave a faint nod.

"I'll watch over him," Anko stated, reassuring Kakashi slightly. Just before departing, he turned to face her again. "If he should…"

"I'm prepared," Anko replied with as much of her standard confidence as she could muster. But it was the set of needle-like daggers held securely between her fingers that Kakashi found his meager, albeit morose, comfort.

* * *

Despite her family's sobbing, they had no problem raising accusing eyes in his direction. As if he didn't have enough guilt. He slipped into her hospital room and she stared back at him with the eye that wasn't swollen shut. "Sen…sei?" she managed with a raspy voice.

"Yeah," he answered softly. She attempted to smile at him, even a weak one. But it wouldn't come. She just couldn't do it. "Don't force yourself, Sakura. It's okay to say 'it hurts'." With that, her face darkened considerably. Kakashi couldn't find even a scrape of the silly, cheerful girl he received as a student those two short years ago. This would be difficult so he needed to ease her into this. "The doctor did tell me the surgery was successful. Though even with the help of the medical jutsu, it may still be difficult to breathe normally for a while." Sakura gave a faint nod while focusing her good eye on the descending dusk painted just beyond the window. She obviously had no intention of talking otherwise. He knew it would be painful for her but he had to get to the bottom of this. Time to cut to the chase.

"I know you are trying to cope with what happened, Sakura. And I wish I could give you more time to pull yourself together, but we don't have any. You need to tell me everything that happened." Sakura understood that fact but it certainly didn't make this any easier. She wanted more than anything to just close her eyes and wake up in her own bed because this had to be a nightmare. No matter how much pain she was in or how real it felt, please somebody just wake her up. She drew a shaky breath and attempted to sort out the images in her head but when she opened her mouth, only a strangled sob was wrenched out.

Kakashi reached out to take her hand, to try and mollify the agony she had to be feeling. But Sakura recoiled away as if burned by his mere presence and stayed huddled in upon herself like a frightened rabbit. "I'm sorry," he spoke softly so as to avoid startling her.

"Sensei," her bruised face crumbled into a mess of tear-stained red and purple splotches. Why couldn't she just stop crying, even for just a moment? All she could ever do was cry.

"The only thing I can do for you is find the one responsible for harming you," Kakashi kept his voice gentle and even, despite the rage pulsing through his veins, "Sakura, no matter how much you may want to protect him, you must tell me: is Sasuke the one who did this to you?"

Sakura sobered instantly with disbelief drawn across her abused face.

* * *

Having been roused early in the morning, just before the four o'clock hour to be more specific, Kakashi and fellow jounin Kurenai were now gathered outside a less-than-classy hotel. They'd been notified by the owner that suspicious noises were coming from one of the rooms and, since it was their turn to be on duty at this hour, it was their job to investigate. Judging by the looks of the place, both had been certain it was probably home to an extraordinary amount of "suspicious noises" but it wasn't known for submitting large amounts of requests for help. That was enough to set off warning bells about this mission.

The old man seemed to be rather tipsy, as his memory lapsed when it came to who the guests exactly were. Though both he and Kurenai were convinced the man may have been put under some kind of genjutsu, even if they couldn't detect it. More alarms were going off about this.

Finally arriving at the room in question and kunai in hand, they cautiously opened the door. A grand array of smells combining blood, sex, and vomit permeated the air. Spent sake flasks lay cluttered about the room, some broken. There had most definitely been some sort of violent struggle with these four walls. It did, however, appear completely abandoned. Neither Kakashi nor Kurenai could sense the presence of anyone, shinobi or otherwise, waiting hidden in order to attack.

Searching the room for clues, Kakashi spotted a torn article of clothing tossed off to the side. The jagged rips and suggested it had been rather forcefully removed. It took him a full thirty seconds to process that it was Sakura's red dress. "Oh my god," he whispered in disbelief.

"Don't touch me!!" a shrill scream ripped through the room. Kurenai had opened a closet and discovered her inside. Shivering, battered to the point that was almost beyond recognition, and stripped of almost all her clothing, Sakura was curled up with both her trembling hands clutching desperately to a kunai. "Get a blanket," Kakashi nearly barked as he crouched next to his student, who tried to make herself as small and distanced as was physically possible. As he and Kurenai attempted to wrap her in a down comforter, Sakura struggled as strongly as her busted body was capable. "Why did—why did he—made me--" Sakura was choking on her words.

"Shh, shh. Calm yourself. We're here now," Kurenai tried to soothe the poor girl in any way she could, despite the fact that she knew it wouldn't reach her like this, "You're badly injured and fighting like this may upset your wounds further."

"I couldn't do anything--I let him--Against his Sharingan I—" Whatever Sakura said after that was lost in her uncontrollable sobs. But both teachers froze at that one word.

_Sharingan._

Kakashi's mind immediately recalled a few weeks prior to when he left Sakura at Sasuke's home and the next day she bore a terrible bruise on her wrist. And earlier this very evening, Iruka had reported other disturbing news. Naruto had been bothered by what he saw at the teahouse and immediately went to his beloved teacher to try and have things sorted out. Why had Sasuke touched Sakura like that, especially when it didn't seem like either had wanted it, the boy asked. After whatever happened at that shop, both Sasuke and Sakura had taken off and hadn't been seen since then. What if Sasuke finally lost all control…?

Completely exhausted on all levels, Sakura slipped into unconsciousness. Struggled gasps for air, along with the heavy bruising along her ribcage and sternum suggested not only broken bones but most likely a punctured lung. Another reason to make his legs move faster to bring her to the hospital all the quicker.

Curse seal or not, was Sasuke truly capable of something as horrendous as this?

If not and the person who had done this still possessed Sharingan eyes meant a whole other layer of impending disaster. Kakashi truly had no idea which was worse in the end: Sasuke committing a heinous crime or _that_ man returning to the village of Konoha to carry on his tradition of committing heinous crimes.

* * *

_Pathetic_.

She could admit she was. Well over an hour had passed and she was still out her sobbing at his doorstep. So he had spent some time with her that evening. It didn't mean anything to him, just as waking in each other's arms a few short weeks ago meant nothing to him. She knew that. And yet…

Maybe she should go home now. It was late and getting cold…Maybe she should go find Naruto and let him know she's okay, more or less. Everyone was probably worried after she bolted out of the teahouse after Sasuke. She really wanted to leave but her legs just wouldn't budge. Perhaps she should just camp out here tonight so she could check on Sasuke bright and early. Maybe then, he'd let her in.

She really could be an idiot, with her mind completely focused on Sasuke. Maybe if she paid attention to her surroundings for a change, she would have noticed the figure approaching from behind. It wasn't until a shadow was cast over her that she whirled around to see a man underneath the light of the pale moon. A dark cape concealed most of his body but she could see his face. Gil-like markings lay beneath his eyes and his leer showed some of his sharpened teeth. But more than anything, she noticed the large object strung across his back, obviously some type of sword.

_Move. _

_Move! _

**_Move!!_**

Sakura was on her feet that just wouldn't run fast enough. It wouldn't help to scream, since she'd been doing that for the past couple hours but not many people lived in this part of town so it wouldn't be of any use. It's not like Sasuke was going to come to her rescue. But she took perhaps four steps before a hand was clamped over her mouth and the man took off with her in tow.

They traveled so quickly that it left her disoriented. It was only after being dumped on the ground that she could assess where she was. It looked like some sort of hotel room and an unkempt one, at that.

"And I suppose this fits into the plan to avoid attracting attention to ourselves?" a man inquired, a different man than who took her. She could only see his profile but he had an angled face and dark hair along with that same cloak. He was seated on the floor before the low table pouring himself, judging by the many scattered bottles, yet another helping of sake.

"A man needs his fun now and then," her kidnapper answered, sounding to be very much the arrogant and reckless type, "Besides, the girl was crying her eyes out at somebody's door and no one let her in. I doubt anyone will even notice she's gone." A derisive snort was what he received in reply.

"What do you want with me?" Sakura finally spoke up, trying her best to sound threatening. The man gave her that same shark-toothed grin again as his answer. She needed to get out of here and fast. Making a break for the door was a stupid idea, especially since she turned her back on the enemy. But she had to try. Even when the shark-man appeared before her, she attempted to skid to a halt with the hopes she could dodge him and shift her momentum towards another direction.

His fist caught her square in the chest and sent her bouncing across the floor before slamming into the opposite wall.

It was the first time her body had ever known such overwhelming pain. The wind was knocked out of her and she just managed to keep herself from vomiting. That one was all it took to leave her body as a shuddering mess. Now the man was approaching again while the other one continued to drink. She was going to be killed and there was no Team 7 to make the daring rescue this time. Sakura, being a creature of habit, had to try escaping again.

"Hmm, you're cute but not a quick learner." He grabbed the back of her dress while she tried to pull away. "Let go!!" The dress gave way and she tumbled to the floor out of the fabric. The man tossed aside the ruined clothing and was coming towards her again. She needed to focus. She needed to remember her training. Her hands went through a series of seals but was unable to finish before a foot connected to her ribs and, in the process, flipped her onto her back.

"Replacement technique? They let weak little girls like you pretend to be shinobi?"

She couldn't breathe.

She couldn't breathe!!

He was about to strike her again when the second man spoke up. "Kisame, do try to be less excessive this time. We really don't need to leave a trail of evidence behind us."

"In other words, make it something easy to clean up?" Kisame responded with a chuckle. He was about to continue his work but paused, an idea apparently dawning upon him. He yanked Sakura up by the hair, despite her loud protests, and dragged her to the opposite end of the table to face the drinking man.

"She's a real looker, isn't she?"

The man's dark hair shadowed his face, though one got the impression he may have raised an eyebrow at the insinuation. How stupid, he must have thought.

"You want her first?"

_First?_

Sakura squirmed and cursed at him when she couldn't break free.

"Don't be ridiculous. I have no need to often…indulge in such things."

Sakura couldn't tell if she felt relief or not when this man chose not to partake in her demise.

"Are you sure? It isn't often you get to visit this place, Itachi-san. Don't you want to have a share of its young ladies?"

Behind the curtain of hair, he took a glance at the girl in question. She couldn't be older than perhaps fifteen, nervous and innocent. And perhaps he enjoyed too much wine this night, for he actually agreed to it. Normally not one to waste his time with these sorts of things, especially something as inane as forcing himself on a young girl, but the liquor was making his blood more bold and less logical. His Sharingan eyes captured her and he noticed the recognition reflected in her face before her body slumped.

So that's who this girl was…

"You may leave, Kisame."

Once alone, Itachi took note of her trembling shoulders. "I trust your body hasn't sustained terrible damage yet."

"Please don't do this to me."

"Look at me."

Sakura couldn't help but look, not quite in control over her actions. Itachi hadn't expected a shinobi as weak as she seemed to have much power. It figures that someone of her build would have a talent for genjutsu. He held her eyes again, strengthening his control, as tears dripped from her chin.

"Come."

Rather than walk, Sakura crawled atop the table and approached, taking a seat at the edge when she reached him. She bit her lip out of fear but so long as she was compliant, that expression of fright wasn't a problem.

"Spread your legs."

Feet planted on the ground, she timidly parted them slightly. Her eyes were a pale shade of green, he noted, and were as wide as dinner plates. Her hands trembled in her lap.

"Have you ever been with a man?"

Her cheeks flushed brightly, though she did not answer. He did not pry to find out her actual answer; he did not see her memory of Sasuke kissing her a few short weeks ago. He placed a hand on the inside of her thigh, forcing her legs wider apart. "Take these off."

She was a frightened mouse as her fingers slipped into her waistband and tugged down her shorts. She scooted forward, almost falling into his lap, as she slid them over her hips. They pooled around her feet and were discarded when Itachi pushed her legs open again. She kept her panties, modest white ones, though his hand inched towards them.

"Your eyes say no, yet it seems you've grown quite aroused already."

She choked back a sob.

"You actually want me to touch you there, don't you."

"…no."

" 'No'?" He dragged a finger slowly against the damp fabric, making her jump when he ghosted over her sensitive area. Pressing more firmly, she pushed forward into his touch.

Trapped.

She was trapped inside her own mind, which screamed for Itachi to stop. But her body was allowing him to do as he pleased. She had no control over herself anymore.

Was this how Sasuke felt?

If she were able, she would have screamed as she watched herself lean forward and press her mouth against his. It was a slow, savoring kiss; she let him slide his tongue in and move languidly inside while his hand remained on her thigh. A soft whimper escaped her mouth and she felt his hand move against the fabric.

"Move forward."

Sakura was barely able to balance against the edge as she kept her feet on either side of his legs. Her palms were against the tabletop, her fingers curling under the edge, and she felt horribly self-conscious clad only in netting and her panties.

"Tell me," his finger pushed aside the fabric and slid inside her, "Has any man ever touched you here?"

"Ngh…no…"

"I see."

He could tell from the feel of her that she was a virgin. Her eyes were screwed shut and she tried not to move against his touch. Slowly pushing his way in, sliding his finger inside her wetness; Sakura made another whimper. He removed his hand and her eyes shot open. So she, too, was growing lusty.

"Remove your undergarments."

She seemed hesitant, being apparently a rather willful girl. He offered his damp finger before her mouth and she once again paused before taking it in, sucking on her own wetness as she eased off her panties. He withdrew his finger and eased her back against the table, leaving a damp trail behind as his fingers followed a path from her neck all the way down. Now that she was lying back with her legs dangling over, he made sure to keep her legs spread wide to him. No matter how shameful it was to expose her when she was so unwillingly wet and weeping with desire.

He took one of her hands and placed it between her thighs, wordlessly telling her what to do. Her hand was shaky as it reached in between her legs, sliding inside shyly. Her touches were experimental and slow. Itachi's hand pressed hers, forcing two, three fingers deeper inside. In and out he pushed, watched her fingers move and made her go further.

"Ahhh…"

She sat forward, trying to push further inside and Itachi forced her to lie back down. She weakly struggled to bring her hand back down when she suddenly felt him shove his own fingers sharply into him. She cried out, back arching. The sudden roughness surprised her as she slammed her hips down hard to meet his thrusts.

In and out, in and out. He tortured her with his touch as sounds he supposed could be considered beautiful began to moan from her mouth. She tried to quiet her voice, tried to control the sensations but sucking on her own fingers did very little to help. He leaned over her then, pushing into her tightness, pressing his body close to hers as their noses almost touched. Her hands lay carelessly by her face, soft hair fanning beneath. It was peculiar, to watch her body practically begging him to take her while her wide green eyes continued to fill with fresh tears.

He baited her with the temptation of a kiss and received a discouraged cry when he denied her. He suckled on her earlobe while she pushed her hips against his fingers. His breath was warm and soft against her skin as he whispered by her ear.

"Let me hear that voice again."

Her eyes seemed to plead with him, wishing for anything but this to continue. Her voice was sweet to the ear though, sounding so needy. He pulled back on his haunches, giving himself a view of his fingers jolting inside between her legs. Her hips rolled hard into his touch, her spine crashing against the unrelenting wood of the table. His thumb began rubbing against someplace a young girl of her age was only just discovering while she pushed down on him. Her voice grew louder, her thrusts became sharper. He felt her body snap taut and clench around him. Without even looking, he could tell her eyes held surprise.

"Was that the first time you've experienced such a feeling?"

"…kill me…"

Itachi took hold of her ankles and tugged her roughly down to straddle his lap. Her eyes were angry and ashamed. The flush of her cheeks could have been from such or from exertion. Her chest heaved breathlessly as she leaned boneless against him, her scent was still strong with desire. She shuddered against him, undoubtedly from now being so sensitive between her thighs. He shifted so slightly beneath him, yet still caused her to jump from arousal.

"Nng…"

Her fingers came between them, pushing inside herself. Her mind must have died somewhere along the way. Rocking against her touch, rocking against his hips, their tongues met each other halfway though their mouths never reached. Without warning, her hand was slick and down his pants. Please let him kill her when it's all over. Sakura let this thought become her mantra, spinning over and over again in her mind. There was no way she ever wanted to face anyone ever again after this. How could she live after—after—

He slid his trousers down just enough. He kept his hands pressed against her hips as he pushed inside of her slowly, so slowly. Even after preparing her, she was still impossibly tight inside. Her mouth was wide with surprise, her toes curling and her voice was a whispered squeak before growing into a perfect moan. He raised her almost completely off him before pushing her down slowly again. Her face appeared so overwhelmed with sensation and her hand crawled beneath his shirt. It was pleasant to feel her touch beneath the fabric, nails digging into the flesh. With his shirt exposing skin now, her free hand shoved up her netting and freed her breasts from their bindings. Skin against skin, her chest pressed firmly against his as he moved deeply, so deeply inside her. That free hand of hers wound its way into his hair as he pressed his mouth against her neck, suppressing the groans threatening to claw their way from his throat.

She became so much tighter, her whole body clinging desperately and she all but screamed this time. Itachi let the end pass through him, his teeth clamping down on her collarbone.

Neither moved as they began to collect their breath. She smiled down on him softly, her whole body flushed pink. Her hair was damp and strand stuck to her face. Even now, his illusion made her body want more. Her eyes were dull, like tarnished metal. Itachi supposed there was only so much a human being could take. It could make him wonder what she might have been like years from now, had she been of better fortune. Would she have been like—

He slid her off his lap, letting her drop wantonly onto the tatami. He made himself decent before rising to his feet. He cast one last look in her direction, receiving a quizzical look. She was appealing like that, tempting. But Itachi was not a man to often act on such. This was enough and the illusion came to an end, as all things do. A gasp followed by the girl clamping a hand over her mouth, possibly to hold off the nausea.

"It is fine if you choose to hate me. You'll likely curse my name with your dying breath."

He left her lying almost completely exposed, though chose not to glance at her again. He had no further use for her. There was no need to see her. The Sharingan kept her burned into his skull, regardless of need. The door clicked shut and that was the last she saw of Itachi.

Sakura choked on a sob. How could this have happened? How could something like this have happened to her?! Her first time was supposed to be special and gentle. So heartfelt and overflowing with feeling, and yet…

Yet she still moaned for him.

She still came for him.

Like the cheap slut he'd made of her.

Rolling over, she did vomit this time. She wished she could expel everything he did to her, with her. Oh so slowly, she numbly forced herself from horrid cries into mere sniffling as she pulled her netting back down. She crawled around to find her discarded clothing, trying to put everything back together. Her body froze on all fours when she felt a hand press against the back of her neck. "Well this certainly makes for a beautiful image."

Kisame's other hand was now on her rear sliding, sliding, almost between her legs.

_No. Please no more…_

Sakura's fingers reached, stretched forward and just managed to grasp the only thing she could use for a weapon. Despite the pressure against her neck, she still found enough strength to haul back and smash a discarded sake bottle hard against his temple. He was surprised more than anything and she took this chance to kick him hard in the stomach. The distance wasn't enough for her to make an escape, but at least it gave her a small measure of satisfaction.

"You bitch!" he roared and his fist cracked against her cheek. Kisame didn't possess the sort of powers Itachi had, so there was only way he could get anyone to obey him: beat them into submission. And as Itachi often said, his work was often excessive.

She certainly didn't look pretty anymore with all the bruised flesh and the blood matted in her hair. She coughed and gagged on the blood rising in her throat. It spilled from her mouth and splattered over her chin. Her voice was gone with all the screaming, but a quick lay was a quick lay. His hand reached for his belt when he froze. "Shit," he pulled back, "They're already on to us, huh?" The only course of action he hand now was just to kill the bitch and get out…She stopped breathing. The eye that could still open was unblinking and vacant, her body completely limp. He couldn't feel her radiating any chakra. She died all on her own? Shinobi really were a joke these days.

He dumped the body in the closet and took off, hoping to catch up with Itachi soon. His traveling companion had sensed the jounin immediately and unsurprisingly took off without him. Had Kisame stayed, he would have discovered Sakura had been holding her breath and had stilled her body. Within her new "hiding" place, she clutched the kunai she managed to steal from his holster before he slammed the door on her. She didn't know where they had taken her and there was no guarantee anyone approaching was from Konoha. They might be another enemy and she would have to fight them, as well. Not that she possessed even the slightest ability to do so in this state. Maybe it would be better if she…If she could gain control over one thing before they…

She pressed the point of the blade at her neck, just beneath her chin. No one was forcing her now. It was her choice. She had the power. She wanted to--

The closet opened and an unexpected Kurenai was on the other side.

The Leaf were here. Seeing her. Like this.

"Don't touch me!!"

* * *

Ino was relaxing for a change. Training was strangely called off for the day and she took this rare opportunity to sleep in a little later and take a luxuriously longer shower before helping out in her family's flower shop. And, let's face it, helping prepare floral arrangements was much easier than practicing jutsu. The day was perfectly simplistic and passed by quietly. Supper was complete, the dishes were clean, and she had absolutely nothing to do now. Perhaps she would read or, even better, head out into the village. She considered seeing Sakura to get the details about what happened with Sasuke last night. She paused, then switched directions. She and Sakura never became the best of friends again after all these years. She knew the Sakura of now well enough to know she wouldn't give up any details.

Maybe she could get Shikamaru to head out with her, though he'd probably just see that as too big of a hassle…Well, she'd just make him go with her anyway!

Strangely, the only resistance she got from Shikamaru was heavy sigh, a sigh that had something more to it that irritation but she couldn't place it. Either way, it was out into the village for some fun. Or, so she thought. The village was frighteningly quiet. It was strange. Ino's parents had been quiet like that all day, as well.

"Wait up!" a voice called out to them, a voice they recognized immediately to be Chouji. They turned to greet him and were slightly surprised to see Asuma with him. "Sensei has been trying to get us all together," Chouji explained, seeming slightly annoyed "But he wouldn't tell me why."

"That's because all of you need to hear what I've got to say. It's very important."

"How come you didn't just have us meet earlier? We probably could have gotten some training in," Ino inquired. She really enjoyed her day off but since Asuma seemed bothered by something, it must be something really serious. "I was needed elsewhere," he stated, leaving no room for argument as he lit a cigarette.

Now seated at a café, his students anxiously awaited the news. With a heavy heart, Asuma began to relay the information to them. "Last night, two S-class criminals had entered the village without anyone noticing." That put enough shock into the three and he hadn't even gotten to the worst part of it yet. "These criminals had kidnapped a girl. She was found alive but her attackers were gone and had left her in very critical condition. The village is on high alert after she identified the two. Due to all the Leaf jounin needing to be briefed on the matter, I wasn't able to train you today."

The information was difficult to absorb. They knew the village was vulnerable right now and that they were training more intensely because of that fact. But such horrid criminals were actually showing up now and from the sound of it, Team Ten was no match for the likes of these shinobi.

"The girl they kidnapped…She was right from our own village, wasn't she." Shikamaru wasn't asking, he was confirming. Asuma knew this question would come but that didn't help him prepare at all when it came to actually telling his students. "Yes, she is," he answered after a long pause.

"Oh god…Do we—We know her, don't we?" Ino tried to keep her voice steady. Some poor girl she'd seen walking the Konoha streets, a customer to her family's store, a former classmate…that was the victim. Asuma sucked in a breath. This was going to be hard for his team to handle, especially Ino.

"It was…It was Sakura. Sakura Haruno."

The glass of water Ino held in her hand slipped between numb fingers and shattered against the floor.

_Ino-chan_

The young Sakura, who used to give Ino the warmest of smiles burned through her mind as she raced out the door. She needed to see Sakura. She needed to—

"Haruno. Sakura Haruno," Ino gasped breathlessly when reaching the receptionist's desk.

"214."

Ino spun fast enough to give herself whiplash and came face to face with Shikamaru. She was about to question him about it but he beat her to it. "Asuma-sensei told me before I left." Her head nodded dumbly and followed him towards the room.

It wasn't a surprise to see the place teeming with Anbu. They were most likely worried those two criminals would go after Sakura again to silence her. But now outside the room, she suddenly lost her nerve. Sakura more than likely still saw her as a rival, so Ino was most likely the last person she'd want to see. There's no way Sakura would want her rival to see her in such a helpless state. What could she even say or do to make things better? For years it had been nothing but fighting and insults, only banning together when it came to battling a dangerous common enemy. How could she just assume—

Shikamaru took her trembling hand in his, adding a layer of surprise to the myriad of emotions displayed on Ino's face. "You came all the way here so there's no sense in turning chicken now. You know you owe it to her to walk through that door." Shikamaru…he really was something else. Feeling more determined now, she opened the door and both entered.

The door squeaking open along with the shuffling of feet alerted Sakura to her new visitors. "I—Ino?"

Ino couldn't move. She couldn't speak. What these monsters did to Sakura was far beyond anything the Sound ninjas put her through. She was injured so badly…Ino didn't know words for this. She never thought she would see something like this happen, not to someone she knew for so long. Shikamaru wanted to say something to either Sakura or Ino but was struck dumb by pure, cold shock. But he did notice Sakura had another visitor. Seated right next to the bed with her hand in his was Naruto, who raised his bloodshot eyes briefly in their direction. Looks like he'd been crying about everything for a long while. Shikamaru may not have been particularly close to Sakura, but the whole ordeal was causing his eyes to sting as tears tried to escape. But Ino was most likely going to get emotional so he blinked his away. She was going to need someone to take care of her after they left here.

Ino blindly took one step after the other, slowly making her way to Sakura's bed, opposite Naruto. Her chin was wobbling quite a bit and she tried to bite her bottom lip to control herself. Sakura needed comfort right now. She couldn't get herself all upset, too.

"Hey," Ino finally said with a shaky voice. Her fingers brushed gently across Sakura's forehead, mindful of the nasty gash it bore. "Ino," Sakura's face was falling again. She cried with Kakashi and she cried even harder than she ever had in her life with Naruto and now Ino was here. In a flash, Ino held Sakura in an embrace while absolutely bawling.

"How could they do this to you!?"

To be continued…


	4. Ch 4: Shrouded in Scarlet

**Wasted Years**

by Mizerable

Ch. 4: Shrouded in Scarlet

It looked cheery, as far as hospital rooms went anyway. Overloaded with flowers from the Yamanaka's store, it gave the space a little more color and comfort. Sakura appreciated the gesture, especially now that her facial swelling had lessened enough for her to open both eyes to see it with. But more than anything, it was the company that held any real worth. Naruto, in particular. During her stay here, he barely left her side. In fact, he spent significantly more time here than even her own family. She wasn't able to find any words to show her appreciation, locked away in her head now of her own volition. Though he wasn't quite able to bring his usually cheerful personality into the room, either. But it was nice of him to come anyway. It helped to pass the hours.

Ino also came at least once a day, usually with Shikamaru and sometimes Chouji in tow. Team Eight was also making appearances more and more frequently. One particular time, Kiba had dropped by to leave Akamaru with her for an entire day. He claimed having a dog around tended to cheer people up. But Hinata in particular was a great help. She had a vast knowledge of herbal medicine and her treatment worked to relieve the pain somewhat. Though she somehow got the impression that having Naruto there at the same time made the girl more nervous than usual. At least some things hadn't changed.

But none of them knew about Itachi.

None of them knew the absolute truth about what happened in that hotel room. And she intended to keep it that way. What would they think if they knew what she did? The terrible things she had done with that man…

Kakashi never explained to her why that man possessed the Sharingan, either. But he was actively searching for him, hardly leaving him time to visit. She was okay with that, though. Her sensei was very dedicated in finding those two men and she could ask no more of him. After all, she always had Naruto by her side. He kept her distracted from remembering Sasuke never--

"Sakura-chan?" Naruto piped up. It was odd to hear him be so sullen all the time, though she supposed the same could be said for her. "When those guys held you captive…" he was fishing for his words. There didn't seem to be a right way to go about asking this but he had to know. At first, he figured she was so jumpy since she was probably just scared and in pain after the whole incident. But he'd caught bits and pieces of conversations between the nurses as well as the jounin of the village. He had to ask. "Those men…did they…"

"Just ask it," Sakura answered in a weary voice. She had grown quite sick of questions.

"Did they do…weird things to you?"

"Last I checked, it isn't normal to kidnap and torture people," Sakura snapped. She was really tired today and Naruto's questions were digging up what she was desperately trying to forget. Naruto frowned out of concern at that. He wasn't the most observant person but he was pretty sure she was hiding something from him. "Yeah, bad guys always hurt people. It's why they're the bad guys," Naruto clarified, "But—What I mean is--Did they…force you to--Oh, forget it." He was tired, too. He wasn't good at this sort of stuff and was just going to upset her, anyway. It was making his head all confused, just like what he saw at the teahouse. Thinking of that, Sasuke—

"Is it that obvious?" Sakura could feel the tears prickling her eyes again. It must have been painted all over her, what she had done. "Is it obvious that he raped me?"

Naruto felt his stomach burning, which meant he was probably going to get sick soon. Like he said, he wasn't as dumb as people still thought he was. He knew about all sorts of bad things that happened in the world. Once of them being forcing a girl to…to…

"…what?" a frightened gasp resonated through the room. It seemed Ino had dropped by for another visit. Sakura could feel her face flush. She _really_ didn't want Ino to know. Ino, the girl who no matter what Sakura did, would always be the more beautiful, more confident girl. A girl that was always worth more. She would never be a whore.

After planting a soft kiss on her forehead, Ino stayed late into the night. She didn't speak of the incident again.

During the long silence brought after the sun vanished, Naruto tried to think about something else besides all the terrible things that happened to his Sakura-chan when he came across an increasingly familiar thought. Of all the many, many visitors Sakura received, not once had any of them been Sasuke.

If anyone was gonna really make Sakura-chan happy, it would be that bastard.

But after finding out where Sasuke lived, there was no one there to answer the door. Naruto had no idea that his other teammate was also laid out in a hospital bed with no sign of recovery. No one saw it a good idea to bring up this fact to any of the genin, either.

* * *

The sunlight pouring through the window made the stark whiteness of the room a little more blinding to his sensitive eyes. After sorting through his disorientation, he realized he was in a hospital bed. His brain was still too fuzzy to really get frustrated about it just yet. For now, he just stared at the empty blankness of the ceiling, feeling vaguely irritated by the hum of the florescent lights and the beep of the heart monitor. Minutes drifted by before he finally felt compelled to sit up.

He wasn't all that surprised that there were no flowers, but the fact that Sakura wasn't wasting all her time by his side was tad startling. More puzzling was he wasn't as comforted as he anticipated feeling when she wouldn't be there anymore. Being alone was what he wanted, what he _needed_…but something about the whole situation was disconcerting. Once his mind cleared a bit, he realized it wasn't the fact that she wasn't there to be the exact reason he was troubled. He remembered that she probably told Kakashi what he did to her under the control of the curse seal and that, perhaps, she wasn't even _allowed_ to see him anymore. He could understand that. In fact, it was his hope that it was the case.

However, his gut feeling was that something worse happened.

There was this empty pit of dread settling in his stomach and worsening with every passing moment, compelling him to flee from this room. An unexpected bout of claustrophobia was making it difficult to breathe, as well. One harsh tug ripped away the tubing and wires that were stuck in his flesh before stalking out the door. The Anbu waiting on the other side were the first indicator that something was really wrong.

All the while, the disconnected monitor continued to sing in the key of flatline "Sasuke is dead."

* * *

Despite better judgment to force the kid back to bed, the younger Uchiha boy was no longer a suspect so it seemed rather unnecessary to keep him under lockdown, per say. It would still be easy enough to keep an eye on him in his weakened state.

In fact, to Sasuke it seemed there was more than the needed amount of Anbu in this place. He was growing more and more wary as it seemed his instincts were right in that there was a serious problem. One that went beyond his personal situation. Wandering through the halls of the hospital was filling him with an even greater confusion on top of everything else. Why was everyone he passed giving him those strange looks, anyway? Was it such a shock that the so-called genius wound up here? It's not like this was the first time he had been admitted to the hospital. Not by a long shot.

It was then that he spotted Team Eight enter one of the rooms. It struck him as a little unusual for all of them to be there together visiting someone. It meant it was probably someone he knew, as well. Was Asuma injured? It would have to be serious to put a jounin in a place like this. This was, after all, the Intensive Care Unit. Upon further investigation, the name residing on the door to indicate whom the patient on the other side was Haruno.

Sakura Haruno.

* * *

They all knew now. Of course Naruto hadn't meant to let it slip. He had just become so upset as the group conversed about the enemy. Unsurprisingly, he looked petrified while awaiting her response but she didn't have much of one. It was the truth and she couldn't hide from it. It was only their faces she wanted to run from. Judging from all the pity in their eyes, they felt bad that she was too weak to protect herself. She could probably assume Ino and Hinata were secretly grateful it was her and not them. Not that she could blame them.

She only felt real hurt coming from Naruto, as he was too simple to feel bad about her being weak or to even realize she was. He was most likely wondering why he hadn't been strong enough to know she was in danger and, therefore, save her.

_God, Naruto…you're gonna kill me if you keep carrying on like this. It hurts too damn much to know you care._

He really did care about her. A long time ago, she would have thought it was just a silly crush on his part. But that really wasn't the case at all. Naruto was here trying to support her, without asking for anything in return. His feelings were just so pure and determined—

"Sakura?"

It came out barely above a whisper but everyone's heads snapped over in the direction the voice came from.

"Sasuke-kun…" she gasped. After all this time had passed, he finally appeared out of nowhere. He seemed puzzled, though. Almost as if he didn't know what happened. But how would that even be possible? The whole village was on alert so surely he had to know why by now.

"What—"

"Sasuke, you bastard!" Naruto shouted, "Don't play dumb! How could you _not_ know?"

"I just woke up," he answered flatly.

"What the hell's that supposed to mean?" Naruto growled, "Were you in a fucking coma!?"

"Yeah," came the next abrupt answer, catching Naruto by surprise.

It wasn't until now that he realized Sasuke was dressed in bleached white hospital clothing, bleeding his pale skin of what little coloring it had. Naruto didn't know Sasuke got hurt, too. He didn't look injured, though. More than anything, he just looked absolutely exhausted. In a flash he suddenly remembered all the trouble Sasuke seemed to have been going through. It had been pushed aside in Naruto's mind, forgotten, after Sakura was attacked.

All this time, Sasuke was trying to recover. Alone.

"I'll be checking out of here as soon as I leave here, but I want to know something. Who did this to you?"

The words wouldn't come out.

After not seeing Sasuke since that night, she hadn't expected him to come by now. And now to know the fact that he never opened that door that horrible night probably wasn't out of a lack of caring...This burden that he was forced to bear due to the curse seal was finally starting to kill him. She wanted to tell him so badly about how much she suffered and let him comfort her. But he was so weighed down with an immeasurable sadness, it would hurt him so terribly to know she was taken right from his doorstep. Had he been able to open it for her, she might not have been hurt at all. She had no interest in handing him that guilt.

"S-class criminals. Two of them," Ino jumped in, sensing Sakura's distress, "They kidnapped her and…." There was no way she could say the rest out loud.

"I want their names," Sasuke demanded, his voice staying calmer than it should have. Which was probably worse sign. "No one will tell us a damn thing," Kiba joined in, "They keep telling us that these dangerous freaks are out there but since we ain't on that level, they don't want us gettin' involved. So no names."

"I'll tell you," Sakura replied, catching everyone off-guard. They had no idea she knew their names. "The first man, the one who took me…he looked a little bit like a shark to me. Possibly a form Mist ninja. I think his name was Kisame." Sakura paused after this, now recalling the mysterious second man. The one who made her…

"The second man was…he was called…" Why did she have to start crying again? Goddamn it! Did she always have to be so weak? Sasuke gave her a nod, urging her to continue while Naruto gave a gentle squeeze to her hand. She was real hesitant about talking now, he realized. That second guy must have been the one who…

"You're reluctant about the second one," Sasuke's voice startled her. She really hadn't expected him to be that interested in knowing. "Was the second guy the more violent of the two?" Sakura shook her head vehemently, the sobs starting to grow out of control.

"Geez, couldn't you be a little nicer about this?" Shikamaru inquired, "She's been through hell—" He shut up after receiving a frosty glare from Sasuke.

But what was going on here did get Sasuke thinking. If the second one whom she wouldn't name was the less violent of the two, what could he have done to make her more upset—

Oh god.

His feet were moving to her bedside now even though he didn't want to get closer to anyone in the room. He still had no idea what the curse seal might make him do if near any of them. If he was getting the right impression of the situation, the last person who should be near Sakura was him. It was those few short weeks ago that he, too, almost—

"I'm not the type of person who knows how to comfort someone else," Sasuke was by the bedside now standing in the spot Naruto usually dwelled within. "I won't force you to say anything else." She didn't speak, save for a choked scream as her fingers wound themselves within the fabric of his shirt.

Always crying. All she could ever do was cry. She cried until Ino was there to be strong enough for the both of them. But she threw that away over a schoolgirl crush. The crush became something real but Sasuke had no feelings for her and stated it more times than she could count. He himself was troubled by something more important than romance. But now that she was weaker than even before Ino, she couldn't even be kind enough to latch onto someone who had even enough strength for himself.

"I didn't want to—I swear I didn't—He wouldn't—" A hand gently began to smooth her hair.

"That's enough. Torturing yourself like this is useless."

Sasuke stared up at the ceiling, wondering vaguely that when Sakura woke up in this bed if she felt as lost as he did when he came to. He didn't even know why he was doing this. He just wanted to know who his enemies were so he could be prepared to deal with them. He knew she had gone through a rough time, but it wasn't his duty or obligation to stay here and spend "quality time" with her. He missed a lot of training so he really needed to make up for it. But when she wrapped her arms around his waist, his body reacted of its own volition and within moments he was seated by her side embracing her closely. He was completely and undeniably a fool.

Naruto could have screamed. He spent so much time here with Sakura and held her hand and talked with her but she still ran to Sasuke. He knew he couldn't blame the guy for not showing up until now. But, goddamn it! He kept rejecting Sakura, saying anything to turn her away and now was clutching her against him. And when Sakura got out of here and got better, he would go back to being cold to her. Why did he always do that to her?!

"N-naruto-kun?" A tug on his sleeve indicated Hinata was next to him now. Why she chose to whisper as an attempt to be quiet when no one could hear her in the first place was beyond him. "We—We think they need some time a-alone," she stuttered. He hadn't even realized almost everyone was gone except for Kiba, who was waiting there for Hinata. He grit his teeth as he glanced over at the two on the bed, who also seemed oblivious to anyone else. "Fine. Whatever," Naruto spat before throwing the door open and storming out.

Sakura knew she hurt Naruto's feelings. She had someone who worshipped her and she ignored him when "something better" came along. And that "something better" probably would never hold her like this again. "These injuries…They were a lot worse when you were admitted here, I assume." Sasuke's voice made her jump and, in turn, reminded her she was still on the mend. It was odd for Sasuke to attempt conversation, and she supposed it was his way of showing his concern. More so than obliging her with a hug.

"Yes, they were much worse." Their usual conversation of silence resumed. Sasuke figured he would most likely be unable to get the second name from her but that was well enough. If that person still traveled with Kisame, it would be a safe bet Sasuke would meet both of them together, should their paths cross.

But for now, he prayed the curse seal wouldn't activate. The last thing he needed to do was traumatize her anymore than she already was. It wasn't out of any special feelings for her but rather the principle of the matter. There were certain things he would not do as a person, though he had come dangerously close with her already. "I have to leave," he finally said, "I'm pretty sure you understand why."

"But I know you wouldn't—"

"_I_ wouldn't," he snapped, "But I have no control over the curse seal." He began to pull away by she clung to him tighter. "Stay," she whispered, "Please stay."

"You know I can't," he unwound her arms from around her, being mindful of injuries and hoping she wouldn't get startled before rising to his feet. He hadn't anticipated her to then wrap her arms around his neck and pull him down for a kiss. Sasuke had been taken completely by surprise, a rare occurrence that was choosing to make itself more and more familiar. After Sakura had been dragged through hell kicking and screaming, after being violated in such a horrible way, she still sought him.

He finally gathered the sense of mind to pull away from her.

"What the hell are—" She promptly shut him up with another determined kiss. And unlike the first time, he found his eyes drifting shut and his lips slowly responding.

What was she doing? Sasuke was afraid of hurting her and wanted to leave in order to protect her. Why was she throwing herself at him after everything she'd done with _that_ man? After she'd kissed _that_ man…Sasuke was kissing her back. The real Sasuke. Not the curse seal, not anything but himself. His hand wound itself in her hair and one kiss became two and two became many.

It was Sasuke who slipped his tongue in first.

His hands began to roam all over her but his touch didn't seem to hurt her wounds at all. It was so sweet it made her want to die. God, she didn't deserve this. Not after…She decided to pull away but Sasuke pursued. She just couldn't suppress the soft mewling sounds emerging from her voice when his tongue was dancing with hers. Those sweet sounds sent shivers down his spine. He pulled her closer to him while her hand slid through his hair. His own hand traveled over the swell of her chest, across her ribs. He slid beneath the fabric, over the soft skin of her back when the pain came.

Sasuke all but shoved her away from him before slapping a hand over the seal. He was such an idiot! "Sasuke-kun?" Sakura reached for him but one glare from his Sharingan eyes told her it would be better _not_ to touch him. Itachi's eyes flashed through her mind and she moved away out of reflex. He stumbled to his feet and rested a hand against the wall to support himself. "I…never meant for this to happen." Sakura should have known it was coming but that didn't lessen the blow at all. "I don't apologize for a lot of things," Sasuke ground out through clenched teeth, "But what I just did to you was completely inexcusable."

"I didn't mean to make the seal activate," she whispered. She would not cry again. She would not cry again. She would not cry…

"Not your fault," he mumbled.

"Will you come see me again?" He gave her an incredulous glance. Being near her made him a very dangerous person and yet she still—"Is that such a good idea?"

"Just for a little while," Sakura fiddled with the blankets nervously, "You don't need to come close." He really shouldn't. The girl was messed up in ways he couldn't define and he would only hurt her. More importantly, this was just adding confusion to his mission. He didn't have time to make these visits. And above all else, he wasn't interested in her.

"I'll try," he finally answered. It was vague enough to avoid promising one or the other. If he never showed up, it's not like he ever guaranteed he would. Not that it should matter if he broke a promise to her or not.

After Sasuke exited, Sakura would always wish later that she said, "I love you." Or at least "goodbye." How was she to know it was the last time they would ever see each other.

* * *

Sasuke was cursing himself out mentally in an infinite amount of ways as he headed towards the hospital exit. He was a complete moron and now in excruciating pain to top it all off. Hopefully he wouldn't be completely screwed over by the curse seal when he trained today. "So they just are letting the Uchiha kid go?"

"Yeah, it looks that way." Hmm, some Anbu were discussing him and he decided to conceal himself to find out why people who probably had a lot better things to do made him the topic of conversation. "Is that really such a good idea to have the kid go unprotected like that?"

"There are others watching him to make sure nothing happens." Great, the village thought of him as a threat now. He knew the curse seal brought a lot of problems and dangers, but these guys hadn't seen him like that. All they witnessed was him in a damn coma. "And from what I gather, those two psychos are trying to keep a low profile now. I doubt they'd go after him now." The criminals who hurt Sakura were interested in him? Was it because of the curse seal? Or…What if Orochimaru had been the second man? The one who forced Sakura to—

"For a guy trying to not draw attention to himself, it was pretty fucking stupid for Itachi to rape that poor girl."

His blood was roaring in his ears and his heart thundered in his chest. He was sure the conversation continued but he couldn't hear it above that ringing. The second man had been…The man who raped Sakura was…

_Foolish brother…If you wish to kill me…Hate me, despise me, and survive in an unsightly way…Run and run and cling onto life…_

It was finally happening. All the pain and loneliness he endured, all the training, everything was for right now. That man, Itachi Uchiha, had returned to the village and Sasuke could no longer run. He was an avenger and the time for his wrath had arrived. He was going to kill his brother.

Pausing briefly enough to gather weapons, Sasuke managed to sneak past the superior Anbu. Perhaps they understood his mission and granted him passage. Sasuke Uchiha fled the village of Konoha, the only home he had ever known, on a mission only he was capable of completing. And, secretly, he always knew this was the last time he would see it.

Perhaps his brother had been expecting him. Even though the hunt thoroughly searched for him for over two weeks now, Sasuke met him at the banks of a river about a four-day's journey away from Konoha. He thought his brother had come to finish their fight from seven years ago. But after his Chidori attack failed and his arm was snapped, he was casually tossed aside and Itachi began to depart. He vaguely registered the other man, who he assumed was Kisame, asking who Sasuke was. Itachi calmly answered it was his younger brother and it seemed he was fully content to just leave their fight unfinished yet again.

It was a foolish attack and he knew it. A straight-on run with a kunai wasn't going to fool anyone. This was why they always tell you at the Academy a shinobi must fight without emotion. But this was raw emotion he was fueled by. Raw emotion that was now feeding the curse seal. Itachi raised an eyebrow at this, remembering vaguely hearing Orochimaru had given him the mark. Of course, seal or not, he easily caught Sasuke by the wrist and was unharmed by the weapon. He contemplated breaking his other arm and leaving him but seeing what a disappointment Sasuke turned out to be, he realized his plan was also foolish. This boy would not become what he foresaw him being.

With a twist of the wrist and with Sasuke's own hand, the blade was plunged into the boy's side. Sasuke's Sharingan eyes were taken by surprise and his mouth opened to let the blood pour out. His hand slipped away from the kunai and now Itachi took hold of it. It, too, received a twist before the handle was used as a lever. The blade tore threw, across the abdomen and scooped out a gruesome path before resting in Itachi's fingers. Sasuke sagged against him before Itachi stepped away to let the body hit the ground.

Sasuke Uchiha, now a defeated man, could do nothing but stare at the sky and watched the clouds pass by. He'd lost all his color and could only exist in black and white before being shrouded in scarlet. It was a little strange to think about clouds and colors right now…It was different than the last time. Against Haku, he thought about all the things he could never finish. Maybe now that he knew his task was impossible, it made his thoughts a little clearer. He couldn't even feel the curse seal burning his flesh anymore. This must really be death.

As his eyes fluttered shut, Sasuke almost believed he could hear a woman's voice.

To be continued…


	5. Ch 5: Most Precious

**Wasted Years**

by Mizerable

Ch. 5: Most Precious

Hell was supposed to hurt.

But this was beyond what he expected. It _really_ fucking hurt! His eyelids felt weighted, his head felt full of cotton and—oww!! He let out an aggravated hiss as something pulled sharply at his skin. "Don't move," a voice said firmly. With a sigh, he settled as much as was possible. It's not like he had anywhere to be, anyway. He was dead.

Whoever was torturing certainly seemed to enjoy it, humming some old and long forgotten folk song while working on his wounded flesh. Callused fingers brushed across his cheek before removing what was apparently cloth covering his eyes, only to replace it with a damp one. The hand he tried to raise, in hopes of removing the rag, wouldn't budge. The vague recollection came to him that the bones in his wrist had been snapped. Now bound in a crude excuse for a splint, it seemed mobility was out for quite a while. At least he had control over the other arm and the cloth was discarded. Despite the dimness of the light, it still bothered his unadjusted eyes. After the initial flinching, he forced his vision to focus on who was with him.

Of all the people he imagined to greet him in hell, she was definitely not one of them.

Soft strands of hair shielded most of her face though he could identify the faint glow of a cigarette resting between her lips. She was a terribly skinny little thing, at that, with her bony fingers working meticulously at whatever project she'd begun on his body. "I ain't a doctor so you'll have ta forgive the fact that it won't look pretty," she stated, easily keeping her smoke balanced as she talked. He raised his head slightly to discover exactly what she was doing to him. He could see part of the gaping wound left in his side. Even in death, the evidence of his failure followed him. Would these wounds plague him forever?

"It'll always be there, huh?"

"Just be grateful you ain't dead," she grumbled, paying less attention to him and more towards the task at hand.

_That_ got his attention.

"This isn't hell?"

That earned a chuckle, if you could even call it that, from her. He gathered rather quickly she wasn't much the type for humor so just what was so amusing? "You sure got a funny way of showin' gratitude, boy."

So he survived, after all. It seemed a little pointless to keep going now, though. These injuries would take who knew how long to heal. He would be left even that much farther off in his training, with the impossible hope of catching up with _that_ man.

"Don't tense up so much. I'm only patchin' you up with thread 'til I can get my hands on real sutures," she advised him. He hadn't even noticed the spool lying by her side until she mentioned it.

"You don't got i.d. on you, kid. I'll take wild guess and say you's a shinobi. So what village am I gonna be sendin' ya home to?" Her hand was rubbing his stomach, minding the wound, as she tried to relax the muscles.

"I don't have one," he said flatly. He was _not_ going back there. Not after this. Not after--

"You a missing-nin?"

"Hardly," he answered with a certain tone of disgust. No, there was already one missing-nin in the family and it wasn't him.

"Well since you ain't goin' back to wherever you from, you'll be considered one now." Ah, all tensed up again. The kid apparently hadn't thought of that.

"Are you going to kill me for the reward?" His voice was loaded with cynicism to match his cold eyes as he stared up at her. This girl could have planned for this all along. It was obvious from her rough hands that she was a shinobi, as well. She might try to get any information that she might deem useful from him. And he would be damned if he let her start any torture and interrogation. He pressed his tongue between his teeth, prepared to bite it off before she could start anything.

"When a man abandons his home, he's always got his reasons. I couldn't care less what you do."

"What about you? Did you abandon your village?"

"Never had one to abandon." She took a long drag, seemingly recollecting wherever it was she came from. "My earliest memories were of the road. I owe my allegiance ta nobody." It was quiet again and the boy relaxed enough for her to go back to work on him. It was a pretty rough wound for someone in his state to endure. When she found him, sure the injuries were bad but it was obvious he was in bad shape to begin with. She didn't even need the hospital clothes to spell that out for her.

"We're about halfway to Lightning Country. Ever been?" He shook his head in response. "Well, you best get used to the rain, then."

Lightning Country, huh? That was a pretty long way from Konoha. How long had this girl been traveling with him unconscious? _How _had she traveled this far with him unconscious?

"I'll take it there are other people with you."

"They don't got a place to call home, neither. Once you're here, who you was before don't matter. They were all a shinobi for some village at some point…I'd like to think we're pretty decent at what we do."

Sasuke had a fairly decent idea as to what line of work this person and her collogues were involved in. Perhaps he shouldn't doubt that she just might kill him, after all.

"Mercenaries?"

"Yeah. Believe it or not, wherever you come from, the higher ups prob'ly know all about us," She ripped some cloth for a bandage to be used as extra security for his wound, "We been hired to track down one group: Akatsuki. That's how I came across you, after all."

She noticed the confusion in his features, the way his brow drew together slightly as he tried to hide his thoughts. He really was just a kid.

"Ya see, the man who fucked you up this bad…Well, you fought him so ya prob'ly know he goes by the name Itachi Uchiha. Him and the guy he travels with are in this Akatsuki and I happened ta come across them, so I went in for the kill. Bastards got away, though."

What?

She, a girl that Konoha knew existed, a girl that Kakashi probably knew existed, was sent to kill Itachi. She was considered to be on that level. This bony, foul-mouthed, nothing of a girl was thought of as being as strong as Itachi. And she spoke of this fact with such ease, as if it were nothing more than watching the rain. _Why?_

Why wasn't it _him_!?

"Oh, did I offend ya somehow?" She didn't have a hint of compassion in her voice, though he couldn't imagine why she should. "'S it piss ya off ta know I'm stronger than you?" She reached towards him, probably to brush the stray hair from his eyes, but he tilted his face away from her. He did not need some bitch stranger talking to him like this. It's not like he ever asked for her help.

"You got a name, kid?"

"Uchiha…" Let's see how she responds to this. "Sasuke Uchiha." Her hand dropped back to her side. "So you're the survivor…"

She knew there was a survivor? Of course she would. It was a job to kill these people. She would have to know their backgrounds.

"So how much will you be paid for killing my brother?" Oh, the sarcasm was dripping in his words.

"I won't get shit unless the Akatsuki's destroyed. And once that happens I get ta avoid execution," she answered blandly, lighting another cigarette. Hmm, it seemed Little Uchiha was curious now.

"I kill criminals. Never said _I_ wasn't one." He couldn't decide if her smirk meant to be smug, or possibly even a little bit regretful. It wasn't until now that he noticed the scar crossing her lip. She may have been able to fight his brother, but it seemed she didn't get that strength the easy way. She must have endured a painfully hard life.

"After my clan was wiped out…" he spoke softly. God, this was so pathetic. "I swore I would avenge their deaths and trained with only that goal in mind. I wanted it more than anything. But the gap was still so wide between us…"

"Goes to show you shouldn't start wishin' to be as strong as me. Nothin' ever changes just by wishin' for it."

He was quiet now. He didn't need to answer that. He didn't need her to _tell _him that. He always knew that he would have to work to catch up to his brother. But after such a horrible defeat, after meeting her, he was just so mortified by his lack of growth. His knuckled burned white as he clutched the dingy futon. How could he ever crawl out of this hole?

"Guess it can't be helped…Looks like I'll have to take ya in."

The shock on his face was quite priceless. From what she gathered about this one, he wasn't one for showing such open emotion. Especially not like this. "What?" She asked coolly, "Since ya ain't goin' home, ya ain't leavin' here, neither." Now on her feet, she headed for the door.

"You never told me who you were," Sasuke called after her.

"Me? I'm the captain of the whole damn bunch."

"No…I meant, your name."

For a guy that didn't seem too interested in other people, he certainly had a lot of curiosity in regards to her. This kid sure was proving to be interesting, if nothing else.

"It's Yanagi. Welcome to the Aohi."

* * *

The drawers had been left pulled out, the cabinet doors thrown open. Not a note. Nothing. He was just gone.

Kakashi stood in the empty training room of Sasuke's former residence, searching for any clue as to where he could have gone. He understood the why but just as Itachi had vanished without a trace, so had his little brother. More important, though, was the how in this whole situation. The Anbu who were supposed to forbid Sasuke from leaving the village had been put under strong genjutsu. Someone intended to let him out. Maybe Itachi had been waiting all these years to fight Sasuke, as well.

…Sasuke was probably dead by now.

Finding no reason left to search the empty house, he paused to pick up one forgotten item. In his haste, Sasuke had forgotten his forehead protector. It was the only sign anyone possessed to show what village they served, to show what village made them as powerful as they were. Sasuke only brought himself on his quest, leaving everything he ever knew behind. He really never intended to return, after all.

* * *

Neither Sasuke nor Naruto had returned to visit her. Almost another two weeks had drifted by and now that the doctor felt her injured lung and her other wounds were stable enough, she was being discharged today. Her mother was buzzing about the room right now, absolutely blissful that her daughter was coming home. Sakura personally didn't care one way or the other. She would still be bedridden, most likely. She didn't eat as much as she should have during her stay and felt incredibly weak as a result. Maybe after sampling some of her mom's home cooking, she might regain the ability to taste.

The only flavor she could recall was the sweet spiciness of Sasuke's kiss.

That day clarified a lot of things for her. Or, more importantly, kissing Sasuke clarified a lot of things. She knew now that he was attracted to her, even if he didn't realize it. It was a very physical and very natural response for a fourteen year-old male to have. But the curse seal brought on his darker impulses and made whatever he felt transform into something very dangerous. But he cared enough to not want to hurt her. They had known each other for years now and, more importantly, were teammates. It was only normal that he grew accustomed to being interested in her safety.

But he didn't love her.

The pain he felt in his life made it impossible for him to love someone else. His ambitions completely dominated his very being. Orochimaru never would have targeted Sasuke if he hadn't known about how greatly he sought power. And even though that creep had pretty much vanished after he assassinated the Hokage, the curse seal was still slowly taking Sasuke's life. Because Sasuke still hungered to be stronger. Only after he completed his mission could he possibly rest. Only then could he open his heart to someone.

But not right now.

Ah, and then there was Naruto. She really hurt him a great deal by turning to Sasuke like that. In all the time they had known each other, she never once hugged Naruto. And aside from the moments when Naruto would latch onto Iruka-sensei or Kakashi-sensei when he was happy with some decision they made, she doubted Naruto ever received a hug from anyone. Maybe she should give him one next time they saw each other. That was, of course, assuming he would come to see her again.

Well, she would just have to swallow her pride and visit him. She owed him for keeping her from completely losing her mind during all of this. If only he could chase away those mysterious Sharingan eyes that haunted her sleep.

* * *

It took nearly a week before he experimented with getting out of bed. The wound was still raw and real sutures never did show up so he was forced to move with extra care. Yanagi was right in saying it didn't look pretty.

He also had the chance to at least _see_ some of the other members of the Aohi. Apparently it was rather uncommon for so many to be there at once. Just as the Akatsuki traveled only in pairs, this group usually did the same. But now as many of them as could reach here were taking a moment to regroup and formulize the next course of action. And from the sound of it, he would not be meeting with these others again for a rather long time.

He really couldn't follow much more than that. All these people seemed to have known each other longer and more deeply than he himself ever knew another person. But when you really didn't have anything but the people you traveled with, maybe you didn't have a choice. He wondered which one of these people he would be traveling with, but then pondered if he we even capable of doing so. His injuries weren't exactly ready for the road and certainly wouldn't hold up in a fight. How the hell was he supposed to do this?

Well, it looked like the good ol' captain finally decided to show up. He hadn't seen much of Yanagi since the day she fixed his wound. Judging by the bandage around her wrist and her bruised cheek, it seemed she kept rather busy. He had no idea she had been going out on missions. She casually dismissed the others, as the plans were set. Sasuke couldn't remember hearing he was involved in something but wasn't too surprised. Where would you put an injured shinobi who rendered zero damage against the one Akatsuki member he faced?

"In case ya ain't figured it out yet, you're paired up with me, kid," Yanagi pointed out before taking a lazy drag from her cigarette. Oh, surprised yet again? "No need to look so shocked. I said I'd watch over ya."

That was true. She was good for her word, after all.

" 'Sides, I usually travel alone. It'll be less boring to have someone else to drink with." The captain took this time to reach in her pocket for her trusty flask. "You drink, Uchiha?" He shook his head to that and she frowned in response. "Too bad. You do now." The flask was now held in his direction and he could already tell by the look on her face that it wasn't something he was allowed to argue about. So he tossed his head back and let the liquid burn his throat. It was more bitter and painful than he anticipated, causing him almost to choke on it. And she looked damn amused by this.

"If you can't endure a little liquor, there's no way you'll survive the hell of being in the Aohi," she remarked before downing her own helping of the drink a little too smoothly, "We obviously go undercover a lot. You'll need ta hold your own at a tavern." She motioned for him to take a seat next to her and, holding his injured side, he gingerly took his place by her side. Offering him the alcohol again, he drank a little more graciously and she smirked in her usual strange way at him. Now she was amused that he wasn't gagging. This was so unbelievably ridiculous!

It was also ridiculous that only two shots of whatever she carried with her made him feel its effects rather intensely. He couldn't really feel his injuries save for a faint stinging sensation stirring across his flesh. Had he been sober, he would have realized having such little control over his weakened body gave the curse seal full access.

Yanagi was taken completely by surprise by the spike in energy before noticing the black markings crawl across his flesh. Hmm…looks like the kid's got some kind of curse put on him. Well, that's just fucking great. "Hey, ya still in there, Uchiha?"

Fast!!

Being a shinobi through and through, of course he kept at least one kunai with him. She barely dodged the descending blade and skid on her feet across the rotten wood floor, remaining crouched to handle his next move. Blade still in hand, Sasuke made a sharp change in direction and the weapon dug deeply into Yanagi's shoulder before both tumbled to the ground. The one hand he had control over now wrapped its fingers around her neck. "Why is it you?" he snarled, "Why are _you_ able to fight him!?"

So that's what this was all about. Alcohol was the cheap man's truth serum and all the things the kid kept locked inside were pouring out. Yanagi was certain this strange curse was also what put him in such a terrible state physically, before the injuries. She had heard of things like this before. A powerful technique that worked like cancer, ravaging the victim from the inside out.

_Was it worth this, kid? You wound up sellin' your soul for a fight you couldn't win._

It was her turn to attack now and she pried his fingers from her flesh before landing a sharp elbow to his throat. It sent him reeling back and his wild Sharingan eyes met her furiously. But unlike his brother, he hadn't mastered any of the mental attacks the bloodline eyes were capable of. And for that, she was grateful. A man possessed by a hideous curse would not make psychological warfare a pleasant experience. And also unlike Itachi's Sharingan, this boy probably could have done damage to her while he was in such a state.

Yes, she was beyond Itachi's mental reaches and that's why she was able to fight him on equal terms. Among other things. She wasn't from any great clan. She was never trained by the great masters of the world and her style of fighting lacked any real grace. But when it came to a plain old survival, she was the best in the game. Had Kisame not interrupted, she might have gotten to kill Itachi. But she was exhausted after avoiding any real food or rest for several days while traveling and fighting lesser enemies. She just didn't have the energy to take them both on at once so she had to take off. She had to live. They would meet again soon enough. She knew Itachi's curiosity always was piqued when it came to fighting against someone at his level. He killed his entire clan just to see how damn strong he was. Or so he said.

With a good yank, she pulled the kunai from her shoulder with little more than a grimace. She really didn't feel like binding another wound right now, though. Speaking of which…Damn it, his wound opened yet again. Having no power over himself meant a complete lack of care for his own health. The curse had one goal in mind and that was erasing the one who disgraced him so badly: Yanagi.

She barely knew this boy so it would be hard to reach him. But he was going to bleed to death right here in front of her if she didn't act fast. Beneath the hem of her raggedy shorts, she kept a pack of acupuncture needles. If all else failed, take the easy way out. Lunging forward, she managed to slam the pin into a pressure point in his neck. He was completely immobilized now.

Yanagi hurriedly produced a sewing needle and some thread in hopes of rebinding his wound. The fighting, along with the pain he was probably in, forced the kid to sober up enough to force the curse to recede for now. Sure, he couldn't move an inch. But he sure could feel everything, including her working on him. Sasuke stared up at her with slightly puzzled eyes and cheeks slightly flushed from the liquor.

"Sorry, kid. I'm leavin' the pin in. It'll make it easier ta fix this," she muttered with the sewing needle in her mouth in order to thread it.

"I gave up everything just to kill that man…" he spoke very softly, a trickle of blood tumbling from his mouth, "I've lived for nothing but…"

"Maybe that's ya problem," Yanagi replied, "Ya go on and on about your ambition but that's just the end result a' lots a' things that gotta come first. For starters, what's your rank?"

"Chuunin."

"Feh…Figures. Instead'a worryin' about your brother so damn much, why didn't ya just focus on being a jounin? Once there, become Anbu. You can't just jump straight to the big goal without crossin' them smaller bridges first."

Sasuke felt very, very stupid right now. A girl who never even had a village to defend, nor a family to avenge, nor a rank to earn was much wiser than he was. And she managed to deal with the curse seal effectively enough. Blood suddenly splashed on his arm and he knew it wasn't coming from his wound.

"Your shoulder—"

"—Is fine." Yanagi had a way of making it very clear when something was closed for discussion. She was a very different type of woman than who he knew from the Konoha, save for maybe Anko. But Anko had a curse seal, as well. That made her a little easier to understand, at any rate. Yanagi certainly was nothing like--

"Just how old are you?" He asked flatly and got a slightly annoyed look from her. Didn't he notice she was busy saving his ass?

"Think I just turned sixteen."

What?? She was that young? Yanagi didn't look it and certainly didn't act it.

"You seem surprised, Uchiha."

"I thought you were—You're only two years older than me."

Heh, he really _was_ just a kid. Though it was pretty unnerving that one of those brooding-types kept giving her saucer-eyes ever five minutes. She wasn't _that_ impressive.

"There. Should hopefully keep ya from dying, for now," Yanagi harshly pulled the needle out of his neck and some blood splattered with it. Maybe she should have been a little nicer about it, not that he earned it. Much.

Sasuke experimenting with movement but the pain with the liquor made him feel a little nauseous. Drinking with his injuries was truly one of his lesser ideas. Maybe it would be better to just rest here for now. The occasional drop of blood leaking from his mouth meant that wound of his probably had some internal damage to go along with it; damage Yanagi wouldn't know how to fix. Why the hell did she choose to take him on her mission?

Little Uchiha looked like he was in _a lot_ of pain. Too bad alcohol was a bad idea to give him as a painkiller. Well, they'd have to learn how to control that curse later anyway. They could have a few drinks together then. For now, what the fuck was she going to do with this poor kid? He certainly wouldn't tell her it hurt.

Hmm…perhaps there was a good way to distract him from the pain. Almost able to raise her lips into a self-satisfied smirk, she leaned over him with her face hovering just above his. "You're bleeding a little," she murmured before licking the crimson trail away with one slow sweep of her tongue. It was a pure coincidence she brushed against his lips briefly before she sat back.

"Guess I should stop my own, too," she switched modes rapidly and starting digging through her travel pack for some rags. Sasuke managed so sit up, now absolutely dumbfounded. His blood was pulsing rapidly and his breath felt a little shaky. What the hell did she just do!?

Finally looking in her direction, he found himself staring at her back.

Her bare back.

Her bare back covered with scars.

She had no home nor any loved ones to defend and never had. Why the fuck had she suffered so many terrible injuries?

"How do you keep going?" His shock was immense. His stab wound and his broken arm made him nearly incapacitated. She had endured countless wounds, including the one he just gave her, but she just kept moving.

"That's simple, kid," Yanagi answered before turning to face him, "I never had a damn thing in this world but my life. It's all anybody's really got. Ya can take someone's money. Take their freedom. But I be damned if anybody's gonna get my life, too."

She was amazingly wise. No one ever taught you things like this at the Academy. It was always "the honor of the ninja is shown by serving the village." Never let anyone lay claim to it, even at the cost of your life. They never really gave a shit about your life, so long as everyone else was kept safe. But if you weren't even breathing, what the hell did it matter if some village only remembered you as a name carved into a fucking stone?

"Hey." He startled so easily these days, as her hand tapped his cheek. It wasn't until now that he even remembered she was topless. "You gonna help me bind this wound or not?"

Great, the kid has probably never seen a topless woman before. He just stared with those wide eyes again. This was turning out to be a real pain in the ass.

"We'a gonna be spendin' a lotta time together so ya best get used to the fact that I got tits." Ah, there was the scowl. He was obviously the formally educated type and she was obviously not. Women where he came from probably did not bare all like this. Guess she'd be his teacher when it came to the real world, too.

After a bit of a group effort and using the alcohol to clean the wound, they managed to neatly tie her bandage over it. She chose not to point out that his hand was shaking. But as he moved away, she did take hold of it and placed it against her breast. His face was a little flushed but he looked pissed more than anything. "Listen, Uchiha. Let's get something clear. You're obviously not comfortable 'cause you think this is something sexual." He seemed a little confused now, plus that curse's energy was starting to trickle back into existence. Ah, the curse played on all your dark urges. Poor bastard.

"You's gonna see a lot of horrifying shit out here and I'm all that you'll have to guide ya through it. We're gonna be eating, sleeping, bathing, you name it together for a long, long time. You's gonna know all a' me more than ya ever wanted to. But that's what it's gonna take to survive. Can ya handle that?"

Sasuke's hand hesitantly relaxed against her chest now. As he sorted out everything she told him today, he noticed that the front of her body was littered with just as many old wounds as the back. She was asking him for things he wasn't sure he could grant himself and they were certainly things he never gave to even to his team back in Konoha. Though there was just something about her simplicity that made it seem okay to accept this.

"I don't right now…but I'll learn to..."

_...Trust you with my life._

To be continued…


	6. Ch 6: Hero

**Wasted Years**

by Mizerable

Ch. 6: Hero

Naruto sulked over another bowl of ramen at Ichiraku. It had been a long time since he could actually _taste_ the noodles. His entire being was preoccupied with only one train of thought and, for once, it had nothing to do with eating or even becoming the Hokage. _She was out of the hospital._ She's been out of the hospital for two weeks. So that put it at about a month since he last went to see her. He knew he was being completely stupid for avoiding her, but it still hurt! He was by her side all that time trying to find some way to soothe away all her pain—but then that _bastard_ showed up and Naruto was completely forgotten.

He had stormed over to that jerk's house with a full speech in mind but he didn't come to the door. Naruto wondered if he got sick again and contemplated kicking the door open to make sure the guy didn't go and die on him. Or at least maybe he should have gone to find a teacher. But instead, he just stuck his hands in his pockets and went home. Maybe Mr. Perfect was visiting her again.

Every. Single. Fucking. Day.

Okay, he could admit it. He'd gone over to the human ice cube's place everyday for the past month and not once did he answer the door. He wanted to ask Kakashi about it but he hardly ever saw his teacher, since the man was too busy worrying about those two psychos that hurt Sakura. Thus, Naruto was pretty much left alone for this entire month.

The loneliness was eating away at him and he desperately wanted to see Sakura. But it hurt so much more to know that even when someone was by your side, you were still completely and utterly alone. Maybe that's how she felt the entire time he was with her in that hospital room. He couldn't do anything. He held her fucking hand all that time and still she couldn't see him. No one could see him. He didn't realize how upset he was at the moment until the chopsticks gave way to the pressure of his balled up hand. Damn it!

"N-Naruto-kun?"

Her quiet ways still managed to make him jump. If Hinata ever gained a little more confidence, she could probably become the top ninja in the whole damn village. You never knew she was coming 'til she was already there. "Your hand…"

Great, he was lame enough to wound himself with busted chopsticks. Hinata was already searching her bag for one of her herbal remedies but he just wasn't in the mood for any of it right now. "It's just a scratch," he grumbled, "Don't bother."

_Don't pretend like you care._

"I'll o-only be a minute…" her soft voice barely reached his ears.

Naruto needed to get out of here and fast. She was like this with everyone. She didn't really give a shit about him. She just didn't have enough faith in herself to not be everybody else's doormat. He began searching his pockets for money and was so far coming up short. "You'd better be able to pay this time," the cook reprimanded, "You're not getting away with another free meal."

She reached for his injured hand and he couldn't take it anymore. "What the hell is wrong with you? I said I'm fine!" he snapped while jerking away from her.

This day was just getting better and better, especially since he was only finding lint.

In a flash, a handful of coins scattered across the counter. Naruto was so stunned that he only was able to watch Hinata's retreating form as she skidded around a corner. He chose not to listen to the cook rant about how rude young men were these days, forcing the women to pay. Instead, he took off after her.

She, on the other hand, was trying to get as far away as possible.

Hinata had been captivated by the strength and determination she'd seen in Naruto dating all the way back to their Academy days. He was so energetic and confident in his every action, things that she never was. Naturally she admired him a great deal and admiration often turns into crushes. So she had a silly crush on him. That was all well and good, just daydreaming and watching him during class. She would have been perfectly content with just the watching if her feelings remained as simple as a schoolgirl crush.

She never intended to truly love him.

Hinata was still young and, thus, had no idea if she was in love. And furthermore, had no one to speak with about her feelings. But the hurt she felt whenever Naruto wasn't with her had grown to be staggering. This went beyond the normal, so far as crushes went.

The tears were burning at the back of her eyes and she harshly rubbed them away with her sleeve, all while running away. Well, there was something she was fabulous at. When it came to running away or hiding or freezing, there was no one better than Hinata Hyuga. She tried so desperately to follow Naruto's path, to change herself into someone confident. But then she would see the one who made her try at all and she'd crumble all over again. It just wasn't fair!

"Hinata!"

He caught her by the shoulder and spun her around to face him. She tried to shield her eyes from him, the colorless eyes that reminded her of all the control her family held over her. The control that made her keep a profound lack of faith in anything she did. They were the eyes that made her hate herself just a little more.

_I made her cry._

Hinata was always a skittish little rabbit that startled over just about anything. But not once could he recall ever being the reason to make her cry. He, after all, never saw her lying in bed every night suffocating herself with the pillow so that no one would hear her sob. She had only been worried about him. She was only going to fix his cut hand. And he still was cold to her, yelled at her. What the hell should he say to her now? It's not like he knew her really well. She was just "that quiet girl" he knew. He hesitantly patted her on the head, hoping she would calm down. This was so awkward.

_He's so close._

It took every ounce of strength not to run away. She didn't know how much more she could take before she ended up hugging him close against her body. It was only her feeling this way, after all. He was just feeling bad because he made _someone_ cry. It didn't matter if it was her or a complete stranger. Naruto was always freaked out by her quiet, nervous ways. He had to think she was such a weird and unattractive girl. She was, after all, very different than Sakura.

Sakura, the girl Naruto loved.

Sakura, the girl who like all the other girls, loved Sasuke.

It really was ridiculous how tangled the web had grown and Hinata knew that she, herself, was another one of the cruel parts. She already knew someone else liked her. She knew Kiba cared for her greatly, even if he didn't shout it from the rooftops like Naruto did about Sakura. It was about the only thing he was subtle about. And she certainly cared about Kiba in return. It's not like his personality bothered her or that she found his looks to be unappealing. He just wasn't Naruto. Now she was paying by drowning in the guilty tears.

Naruto wondered what the hell he should do. Maybe give her a hug? No, that would probably make her even more scared or upset or whatever not happy emotion she was displaying. No wonder Sakura went to that bastard instead. _He_ had the confidence to hold her close and know it wouldn't frighten her. He saw the trust Sakura immediately placed in Sasuke the minute the guy was in the room. She'd let Naruto hold her hand but she would never let him hug her. Never had. Never will. Naruto hugged his teachers when really happy but nobody ever really hugged him. Ever. There's no way in hell he could start with timid Hinata.

"Naruto?"

He jumped once again upon hearing his name. Some ninja he was if he was always getting caught off-guard. Spinning around to address whoever snuck up on him this time, he really wasn't expecting her to be there. She was paler than he ever remembered her being but her bruises were fading, the cuts mostly healed. Though no matter how her body healed, her eyes were still haunted.

"Sakura-chan."

It was weird to see her out of the hospital; stranger than he thought it would feel. Maybe it was because he barely recognized her, even though the injuries were mended. Gone was her red dress, now replaced by a more subdued outfit of grays and blues. He was so daunted by her sudden appearance that he'd completely forgotten about Hinata. Turning quickly to make sure she was okay, all he found was vacant space. She was long gone and all that was left was just him and Sakura, the girl he'd known for years. Only now he was at a complete loss for words with her. He'd say it was a rare thing, but it was something becoming more and more familiar. Though it seemed Sakura hadn't a clue as to what she should be saying, either. Somehow, he doubted even she would want to start a conversation by saying "sorry I love someone else more than you".

"How convenient I found both of you together."

Geez! Could everyone sneak up on him these days? Naruto was about to yell at the person who surprised him but completely forgot his irritation upon realizing it was Kakashi. It had been a while since either student had seen him and it was comforting to know he was okay, despite the fatigue showing in his one visible eye. "I'm glad to see you up and about again, Sakura," he stated and she gave a small nod in appreciation. What could she really say to that, anyway? But it didn't take long before she could tell Kakashi had something important to tell them, something that was going to be rather unpleasant. The fact that Naruto was being so quiet, too, was only confirming her suspicions.

"We haven't gotten together in a while," he remarked. This was bound to have disastrous results when he told them the truth. And to be honest, he didn't know who would react worse. "Whatever you have to say, just say it," Sakura clipped his thoughts. They probably had sneaking suspicions about what this was about. He wouldn't be able to dance around the subject with them this time, nor could he hide anything. Best to get this over with.

"What I have to say will not be easy for either of you to take," Kakashi began, "And I'm sure you may have an idea of what this is about."

"It's…It's Sasuke, isn't it," Naruto replied. It had to be. Why else would Kakashi be telling them something important when their whole team wasn't there? Kakashi nodded so his two students prepared themselves. Sasuke must have been sent back to the hospital. Was he in another coma? Had he been lying in a bed there all alone again?

"About a month ago, Sasuke took off. He left the village—"

"What!?" Naruto shouted. How come no one told him before now? Wasn't he even worth _that_ much? Why the hell didn't that bastard even let him know he was leaving? The jerk just up and left knowing how much Sakura needed him? Sasuke left _him _behind!? "Why the hell did he do that!?"

"Was he sent on a mission?" Sakura's softer voice chimed in. Did he leave because of her? Did he leave because of the kiss? Was it the curse seal? Did he--

"We're fairly certain he was after the two men that attacked you, Sakura."

She felt very heavy all of a sudden. Sasuke went after her attackers? Why? Why would he do something so _stupid_!?

All this time Sasuke always pretended to be so damn cool. He must really care about Sakura after all if he chased down those guys all by himself. But why would he go alone? They may have been rivals, but you'd think he'd at least take the other member of his team along just to make sure they got those assholes. Sasuke couldn't even acknowledge him enough to use him in a backup plan. That arrogant prick…

Kakashi released a heavy sigh. God knows he shouldn't tell them this but they were too involved now. These secrets no longer mattered. "There's something you two must know about those men, one in particular." His students looked up at him with wide trusting eyes. They expected the truth and he had to deliver it now. He owed them that much after all the hell they'd been through, Sakura especially. Well, maybe some of it could be withheld. He owed _Sasuke_ that much. "The man named Itachi…He is the one Sasuke has been looking for. Itachi is the man Sasuke vowed to kill."

"That man…was…" Sakura's head was swimming. The man who she…who she let…The man she slept with was the same man that annihilated Sasuke's clan. She let the man who killed Sasuke's family fuck her. Her feet felt like they were going to give out any moment and she found herself gravitating with stumbling steps towards Naruto. He certainly hadn't expected her trembling arms to wrap around his waist. "S-Sakura-chan?" He couldn't believe how bad his voice was cracking. But his mouth felt so dry, it almost felt impossible to speak. "I've never done this, have I…" her emerald eyes met his, her haunted gaze made him uncomfortable somehow. "I've known you for years but I never hugged you…" Naruto slowly shook his head. No, she never had but why was she picking this moment to realize that? Why wasn't she asking about the rest of the details behind Sasuke's disappearance?

Memories he'd long filed away drifted to the surface, memories of an injured and broken Sasuke divulging some of his past. Sasuke told him he couldn't die until he killed that one man, though the word "brother" somehow fit into the picture. Was Itachi Sasuke's brother? Did Sasuke have to kill the only other surviving member of his clan?

"It's been a month since anyone last saw or heard from him and despite our efforts to find Sasuke, the trail has grown cold. All we found was a kunai lying by a riverbank covered in his blood…" He didn't need to spell out that there was generous amount of the crimson liquid that stained the ground. The looks on their faces said it all. They could tell what was coming next but that wouldn't make it hurt any less when he said it aloud. This was going to break the both of them.

"Sensei?" Naruto's voice was showing his fears. It couldn't be. He was fine. Sasuke was probably all banged up if he met up with those guys but he would be okay. He was the rival he'd been chasing all these years, after all. And there was no way in hell Naruto would have a weak guy as his rival. He was the top rookie of their class only a couple short years ago. The Konoha prodigy Sasuke Uchiha! He probably was relaxing with a lighter heart in a nice warm bed now that his mission was over. He must have avenged his clan and was free from all his burdens now. Sasuke was okay! Why wasn't Kakashi saying Sasuke was okay? _Why!?_

Maybe Naruto might have been holding onto a sliver of hope but Sakura must have realized Sasuke was no match for the man he sought. Itachi alone possessed more than enough power to take his life. This was it, though. His students were faced with their first horrid loss, one that would strike home even more than the death of the Third Hokage.

"It's been accepted that—Sasuke has been declared a hero."

Falling.

She couldn't stand up anymore, not after everything was ripped out from under her. She didn't think it was possible to be so numb and have everything hurt so much all at once. Sakura knew what being called a hero meant in their village. Heroes had their names carved into the memorial. The title of hero was given to those killed in combat.

He was dead. Sasuke was dead. Sasuke was killed. Those two men killed Sasuke. Sasuke found out the man he needed to kill was near because he was her attacker. Sasuke got himself killed because they hurt her. Sasuke died because of her. She killed Sasuke. She killed Sasuke. She killed…

Naruto managed to catch Sakura before she hit the dirt. She didn't start crying, as was the set Sakura-response when she was upset. She was just blank, not that Naruto really noticed. He just sunk to the ground with her clutching onto him. But with the thousands of emotions buzzing inside, he couldn't focus enough to look at anything. This was for real. It wasn't like fighting Haku…Sasuke wouldn't be coming back this time. Maybe after the initial shock wore off, he would argue with Kakashi. Maybe he would demand the search to continue. Maybe he would—

Maybe he would stop screaming first.

* * *

Ino was only buying some snacks for her team. It was just a silly little errand. But the bag slipped from her hands and its contents spilled all over the ground upon hearing Kakashi speaking to his students. It couldn't be true. It couldn't be!

"Sasuke-kun…was…" She took off in the other direction. It was finally happening. She always heard about this from the older members of the village, mostly the retired ninjas speaking of bitter tales over bitter drinks. They had a saying that you weren't a true shinobi until your first friend was killed. So it all started. First the attack on Sakura, now Sasuke…Who would be next? Which one of her friends would she lose next? Who would be ripped away from her? Who—

She slammed hard into someone crossing her path but really couldn't care less right now. Her whole world was starting to fall apart and the tears wouldn't stop flowing.

"Ino, what happened?"

_Shikamaru?_

She clung desperately to him, unable to stop sobbing. How could all of this be happening!?

"Hey! Are you okay? Did something happen?" Shikamaru was getting nervous. It was impossible to be blind to the hell the village was in. Ino had been struggling enough with everything that happened to Sakura. What could have happened now to get her this upset?

"He's—He was—Oh god," could she really say this out loud? Could she really say it? That would mean accepting everyone would be taken away from her someday. At some point in her life, she would never see Shikamaru again.

_Please don't let him be next. _

_Please don't take Shikamaru next!_

"Sasuke-kun's dead!"

The words rang harshly in his ears. Instinctively, he pulled Ino close against him and just let her bawl. The worry that grew with every passing day about Sasuke finally came to a conclusion. No one seemed to be able to find him and the whispering was getting around as to what happened to the Uchiha boy. But now the truth came out but it still seemed so surreal. Shikamaru could have bet money he'd get killed before Sasuke ever would. He never could have imagined a guy so much stronger than himself would die first. Though Sasuke was a really troubled individual. Even his death was probably something horribly traumatic and tragic. So if Sasuke Uchiha died, how much longer would it be before he, too, lost his life? How long before Ino—

* * *

It was a struggle to move, even more of a challenge than it was yesterday. The wound in his side was survivable so far as traveling was concerned and his arm was somewhat functional. But they always reminded him of how damaged they were when he first woke up, then when they stopped for the night. And right now it was night. Like Yanagi told him, the closer you got to Lightning Country the more it rained. It only served to make his mood just a little more downtrodden.

What really made him wonder was how in god's name did Yanagi keep going. Her ideals were all well and good in theory, but how could she ever want to survive so badly that she would suffer through all this. It's not as if she had a real goal at the end, except to survive. She had nothing to avenge, unlike himself. She had no true hate behind her motivations to kill the Akatsuki members. When he dressed the stab wound he gave her, he noted the other fresh wounds she possessed. They looked to be about as old as the wounds he himself had, pretty much suggesting Itachi had given her the awful injuries that she so crudely stitched back together.

On top of the aches and pains from healing injuries and the drenched feeling the rain constantly gave him, they hadn't eaten in days. Yanagi insisted what little money she held be used on cheap lodging and he really couldn't argue there. He certainly didn't want to sleep outside every night in this weather. But she seemingly had no intention to stop and hunt any for any food while walking further and further everyday.

She did spend a fair amount on smokes and booze though and _that_ bothered him. In fact, right now she was seated in the corner enjoying her drink while he chose to lie in bed. He would likely fall asleep soon, as he could barely stay awake once they retired at the end of the day. And he wouldn't be able to get up until well after she did. There may have only been one bed wherever they stayed but he doubted she slept in it. He was starting to doubt she slept. He was starting to doubt she was human.

A good example that made him question her was her lack of care when it came to decency. The good guys had certain rules to follow and she certainly didn't heed any of them. But maybe she just couldn't read them. Having no education meant Yanagi was completely illiterate. After stubbing out a cigarette against the decaying floor, she began to strip away her soggy clothing. But maybe he was worse for watching her. Now she was making him a goddamn voyeur. He vaguely wondered what Sakura would think of him now—

He always made it a point to push her from his thoughts whenever she came to mind. Right now was certainly no different. It's not like he was ever going to see her again. Or anyone from Konoha if he could help it. It's not like he ever cared about anyone there, or her either. It might have been wrong to be staring at this girl, who for all intents and purposes, was a stranger. And certainly not his lover. But seeing the path he'd chosen for his life, it didn't really matter how perverted his moral compass became in any regard.

"So what's her name?" Yanagi's voice broke the silence, startling him.

" 'Her'?"

"Yeah. The girl you thinkin' about," she enjoyed another shot from her flask.

Did she know some sort of mind-reading jutsu? How the hell was she always inside his head?

"She's no one." Yanagi gave him a doubtful glance. So he wanted to be difficult today. "I find that hard ta believe," she replied before taking a seat at the edge of the bed. His eyes were trying to be subtle as they examined her but he was doing a pisspoor job at that. His fingers brushed against one of her newer wounds so he must have lost interest in subtle.

"_He_ gave you these."

She knew damn well who he meant, since that tone was seemingly reserved when only making reference to his brother. So the boy actually felt like talking tonight.

"Yeah, this one too," she guided his fingers over a forming scar that crossed down her hip. She could tell he was ashamed that even though she, too, received wounds from Itachi, she was in far less pain. "How do you keep surviving like this?" His fingertips were tracing patterns over her cross-stitched flesh.

"I believe we had this conversation before." And Yanagi hated repeating herself. What was so hard for this boy to understand?

"You call this living?" he growled, "Even an animal has a better lifestyle than this." He hadn't anticipated her hand to catch him sharply across the jaw.

"Your problem is you's a fuckin' spoiled brat," she answered coolly, her fingers resting around his throat just to make sure he understood who was in charge, "Ya ain't never really had ta struggle just to live. Ya ain't always been a goddamn orphan."

Oh, he was pissed now, though she really couldn't care. Not that he expected her to. She didn't, or couldn't, understand the agony of living in the curse seal. He opened his mouth to make that point but she wasn't finished with him yet, either.

"Ya always had a roof over your head, a meal in ya belly, and ya ass in a classroom. So welcome to the real world, kid. Sorry if it ain't up to standard for ya but I ain't gonna let nobody take the life ya think I never had. If ya can't cut it here, then go the back ta that lil village 'a yours and have the nice things."

He hadn't intended to hurt her feelings. He hadn't expected her to be so sensitive, either. It's been said that you can't miss what you never had. Though if that were the case, he doubted Yanagi would be angry. He just needed to know the secret to living in a way that really was foreign to him, her way of living. Maybe he had been pampered back home…

Sasuke would never acknowledge, even to himself, that he was attempting to keep Yanagi from asking about Sakura no matter what it took.

She was certainly aware he deliberately changed the subject, though. It was part of what was irritating her. The type of people that joined the Aohi had absolutely nothing left to go back for. Why had he chosen to stay when he had a lady most likely waiting for his return? Was the mission that important that he'd give up a chance at the nice, happy life? It was the type of life she certainly would never know. Though to be rather truthful, she doubted she could have found happiness settling down anywhere. The only thing she'd ever grown to love in this world was the road and she liked it that way.

Yanagi wanted to bother him about the mystery girl some more but the liquor made her drowsy. And it looked like he was too tired to listen to her questions, anyway. He was quickly fading into slumber. Hmm, another day perhaps…

* * *

When Sasuke woke the next morning, there were some stale biscuits waiting on the table. Probably baked with sawdust, he couldn't remember anything tasting so delicious as those lumps of questionable grain. After devouring his meal, he found Yanagi already waiting outside in the rain for him with a pack slung carelessly over her shoulder. He didn't have to say anything for her to understand his gratitude.

Under the torrents of raindrops, all agitation over last night's questions was quietly swept away.

* * *

Jounin she could place neither names nor faces to nodded to her as she passed.

_Don't look at me._

_Don't look at me with those eyes._

Everyone in the village knew who Sakura Haruno was by now. She was the survivor. She was the _victim_.

Even so, she could push away all her frustrations for his sake.

Four seasons had gone by and his colors were bled away and swallowed up by the passage of time. But he was never far from her thoughts. She made it a habit to come here whenever her schedule allowed. It frightened her to think that everything he was had all been reduced to a tiny name etched into stone. Her fingers traced over the characters, the only thing that still defined him in this world.

"Hi, Sasuke-kun," she whispered.

To be continued…


	7. Ch 7: My All

**Wasted Years**

by Mizerable

Ch. 7: My All

It was nearly impossible to suppress the hiss after pressing the rag soaked in alcohol against the cut; a cut that chose to continually bleed down from above his eyebrow into his eye. He should have been used to his body enduring this kind of wear-and-tear, especially since he was pretty worn and torn these days. After all, he wanted to begin his push towards becoming a jounin soon so he'd have to get used to dealing with a little bit of pain.

Then again, he wasn't completely sure it was the cut that hurt so much. The fact that he deserved every bit of pain wasn't what bothered him, either. Whenever he closed his eyes, the image of Sakura's terrified expression blazed through his mind. She's the one who struck him. She lashed out because he did something bad.

He wasn't sure what exactly possessed him to do something so utterly stupid but he was Naruto Uzumaki. He was known for doing stupid things. And this had to top the list.

Over a year has gone by since…Naruto didn't like thinking about it. A part of him blatantly refused to accept he would never see Sasuke again. They'd always swore they would get to fight each other for real some day; to find out who really was the stronger of the two. But Naruto was tossed aside when Sasuke's true opponent returned and then Sasuke was…

Naruto wasn't sure how he survived those first few weeks. It hurt so much that he was pretty damn sure his heart would give out and he'd just drop dead. Sasuke was his teammate and, more importantly, his rival. But they were never what anyone could call friends. Sasuke would never let anyone get that close. Friends or not, Naruto knew Sasuke was hurting a lot. If there was one thing Naruto knew about, it was enduring a lot of pain. But somehow he thought Sasuke would just get better. He wasn't a quitter so Naruto figured he'd stay alive to complete his goal. But he made it right to the end and just…

Towards the end, Sakura also knew how badly Sasuke must have been suffering. She became less preoccupied with getting a date out of Sasuke and more involved with just coaxing him out of his shell. She must have been able to accept how much he was hurting, more so than even Naruto could. Maybe Sasuke even somehow sensed what was going to happen to him and gave Sakura that hug. Just giving his thanks before he…

Naruto shook his head over the thoughts. It was just going to depress him all over again. Sasuke was gone and nothing was going to change that. Everyone was having a hard time letting go and, of course, Sakura was hurting the most. After being put through hell, her precious Sasuke was ripped away from her for good. That's when things got really hard. No matter how brightly the sun shown overhead, there was never a break from the rain under her skies. Naturally, Naruto wanted to be her umbrella.

She needed someone to cling to since then. At first, she made it a point to deny everything. Some days she would wait by the gates that he would never return through, hoping to convince herself that he wasn't gone. Meanwhile Naruto was terrified of leaving her alone there. After she was attacked so brutally, he swore there would be no second time. He would protect Sakura at all costs.

They were constantly near each other. When both were stable enough, they began to train together again. The training sessions turned into afternoon tea, which flowed smoothly into supper and eventually bled into stargazing. It was just becoming harder and harder to say goodbye at the end of the day. Both could never be sure if it would be the last time they could see the other's face. Naruto couldn't help but fall further and further in love with her.

But today he blew it.

They were sitting together watching the sunset in what had evolved into a comfortable quiet between the two. It was hard to get Sakura to say anything these days but Naruto was fairly certain she didn't want to hear how painfully deep his feelings were for her. So the empty spaces prevailed.

But something was off today. Something was different about it, or maybe something was different about himself. Sakura was talking softly about something though, as said before, she never really said anything. They were just shallow sounds that fell flatly against his ears. Maybe it was the blood sun dying in the background. Maybe it was the way the wind tugged her loose strands of hair just the right way. Her white noise words were lost to him as he leaned in, softly brushing his lips against hers.

Too stunned to say or do anything, even after he pulled back ever so slightly with his cheeks now flushed...He couldn't help but assume she was okay. He couldn't help but take. Hoping to shrug off his shyness, he kissed her again with a hand firmly holding her chin. Just as her eyes began to flutter shut, they snapped back open right before her hand met gracelessly with his face. With a face set in panic, she stumbled backwards and hoped her breathing would calm.

_Oh god…I made her…I made her…_

Naruto took off clear in the other direction and didn't stop racing until he slammed his door shut upon reaching home. If he hadn't panicked as badly as he did, he could have at least gotten out an apology before running off. He wasn't entirely sure what made him do such a thing to Sakura, something like what those men did. He never asked her permission. He just did it without taking her feelings into account.

Maybe it was the damn Nine Tails' fault. Something had to be blamed for bringing out such weird feelings in him. Naruto couldn't deny this wasn't the first time he felt so compelled to kiss her. Somehow he knew his body wanted even more than that. Sometimes he'd get that funny feeling lying in bed at night collecting his thoughts. The loneliness that would gnaw away at his insides forced him to think of _anything_ to pass the hours. It would be impossible to try and sleep when you'd rather be slitting your wrists.

The faces of people he knew would tumble through his mind, faces of people he could only wish cared about him just a little. Everything felt so empty. Any shred of kindness didn't even seem real, except for her. The older he got, the more Sakura dominated his thoughts. He knew it was something he shouldn't be doing and his face would burn with shame but that didn't stop his mind or body from reacting. Capable of conjuring imagery in his head that probably rivaled that pervert sennin in vulgarity, his brain had stripped Sakura down of everything save for being a scapegoat for his pain. These twisted thoughts only made the funny feeling spread. His hand would slip beneath the covers and beneath his waistband and he always found it a little easier to fall asleep afterwards. Though it was becoming increasingly difficult to face himself in the mirror every morning.

Now he couldn't face Sakura at all and was left only with the emptiness.

Perhaps he should give more thought to slitting his wrists.

* * *

_He finally…_

Sakura would be a tremendous liar to say she hadn't seen this coming. This year had robbed her of a great deal of things: her innocence, her happiness, her lov—

Yes. Many things were gone, even if she refused to acknowledge that so much was lost. But through all her pain, Naruto remained faithfully by her side. His patience and devotion made whatever part of her heart that was already torn apart ache inconsolably. No matter where she went or what she did, he blindly followed in hope of shielding her from any further hurt. Today had been no different.

After training, both wandered through their fatigue to find a good spot for watching sunsets. Seated side by side, she let herself prattle on about inane things. Whatever it took to stop those eyes from staring back at her with such intense concern. But Naruto had become surprisingly adept at knowing when she was covering up her hurt. Maybe he knew that her heart was particularly heavy in reminiscing about Sasuke…

Doing the simplest of tasks made her think of him the most. She couldn't recall a time where Sasuke just sat by her side and just watched the sun dip below the horizon. In fact, she was used to saying "I'll see you tomorrow" to his retreating form underneath the dying sunlight. She always wanted to make him stay for just one sunset but never bothered, figuring there would be hundreds of sunsets waiting for them to share together. She was always just waiting for him…

Naruto was watching her rather intensely to the point that almost made her uneasy. She wasn't a complete fool, though. She knew he stopped listening to what she was saying a while ago. She certainly wasn't paying attention to what she said, either. The fact he was a fifteen year-old guy also played a factor. He didn't need to say anything to let her know he was likely having, for lack of a better word, "interesting" thoughts about her this very moment. She was simply going to ignore it, though. It was just Naruto and Naruto would never do anything to her. Of all the silly things he did, he never intentionally hurt her.

Maybe that's why it surprised her so much that he gathered enough courage to kiss her.

It was brief and immensely shy but it didn't feel so bad. But she was just so amazed that he did it that she couldn't say anything. It was when he became a little more daring that her thoughts started to form. He held her chin steady, pressed his lips firmly against hers, and she could feel just how much he wanted her at that very moment. It was a terribly sweet and raw feeling, so very different than the guarded yet hungry feel of Sasuke's mouth against her.

_Sasuke-kun!_

…Was gone. All she would ever have of him was the memory of their kiss searing her brain. Sasuke was gone and there was nothing left but memories. Surely she could grow to love Naruto in such a way. He certainly had made a home in her heart. Her eyes began to drift close but it was with shut eyes she always found Sharingan staring back at her. Cold and possessive and controlling…The unwanted memory of Itachi against her, around her, within her…The wounds of her heart were ripped asunder as each sensation seemed to burn her skin, especially his lips on hers.

_Get away._

**_Get away._**

**_NO!!_**

Her hand lashed out and she propelled her body upward onto shaky limbs, stumbling backwards. Her breath was ragged and it took a moment to assess the situation. She was not in the hotel. Itachi was nowhere in sight. All she could see was Naruto sitting before with blush-stained cheeks and blood flowing from a gash above his eye. She had struck Naruto, who took off before she could force her voice to speak.

How could she have done such a thing? Naruto cared for her on levels she couldn't even name and she hurt him. The cut would heal well enough but she was positive his heart just incurred serious damage. She was well aware of how weak she became as a person since everything fell apart last year. She was clingy and needy and Naruto was trying so desperately to restore her stolen happiness.

But what about Naruto's happiness?

He would never admit how greatly he was hurt by Sasuke's death. In that situation, as well as her own, Naruto felt such terrible guilt. He truly believed he could have saved both of his teammates from the horrors they suffered. Naruto also in many ways felt betrayed when it came to Sasuke, whom he felt didn't even acknowledge Naruto enough to let him help with anything. Naruto was so full of hurt over the loss of his rival and his inability to protect the girl he loved. And yet she still…

Sakura leaned back against the memorial with a sigh. She often came here to gather strength from the Leaf heroes, especially Sasuke. Her fingers didn't dance over his name today, choosing instead to wander over the item in her pocket. Kakashi felt if anyone should have Sasuke's forgotten forehead protector, it should be her. It immediately became her most prized possession, though she was saddened further by the fact that Sasuke died without anything to identify him as a Konoha shinobi. He never once said it but she knew he held a certain amount of pride in the village that trained him.

The fireflies started to dot the air around her, a signal that she needed to make up her mind now. It was time for her to let go for real now and it hurt immensely. There was nothing to betray, as all she held of Sasuke was bittersweet thoughts. Their kiss held her captive a year later but it was truly goodbye now. Her heart would now have to offer what little was left to the one who was still here to love her.

Her feet carried her towards Naruto's home with a heart heavier than it should have felt. She never even noticed Hinata when racing by through the streets.

* * *

It was bizarre to see Sakura without Naruto right next to her. They had become inseparable over this past year, this difficult year. It only served to prove there was no place for Hinata in Naruto's life, not that there ever was one to begin with. To be perfectly honest, she had hardly spoken a word to him since that day…the day the news about Sasuke arrived. What could she possibly say to comfort Naruto? She knew very little about Sasuke, as he chose to keep to himself. Sakura was obviously the best choice, since she spent the most time with both boys. Naruto would need Sakura and Sakura needed Naruto. They would be happier together.

Naruto never even came looking for her over this past year so it was obvious she didn't matter to him. Not that he would have had much luck, anyway. Hinata completely immersed herself in training and, while only becoming a chuunin just before turning fourteen, she recently succeeded in becoming a jounin. Since she was so absolutely silent by nature, her added strength from working so hard made her lethal. As far as she knew, she was the first from her graduating class to receive the status. Plus it kept her so completely distracted from thinking all the time that she didn't have time to let her confidence falter. One false move and everybody's dead. She needed that kind of challenge to keep her mind off everything else but the missions.

It certainly lessened the harassment she usually received from her father, at any rate.

It was a little lonely, though, without Kiba and Shino there anymore. But they were both so proud of her. In fact, she just returned from a mission and was going to see Kiba right now; yet another step further away from Naruto. Kiba was good to her and she did care about him. Surely she could learn to fall in love with him. His personality was very similar to Naruto's in a lot of ways.

So now they met up with each other and the evening just blended together in her head. She was pretty sure they held up some kind of conversation, which was the normal he talked/she listened. She never was very good at talking. But the way his eyes lit up while watching her was burned into her mind. He really was just happy to see her again and talk to her. It was really quite flattering.

That's why she would let him kiss her.

Nighttime was a grand thing. Both came from very important families in their village, Hinata especially. Her father would be furious if she were caught doing something like this. Slipping in the alley behind the shops and away from the lanterns illuminating the streets, no one could see them and she liked it that way. She hated being seen. In the dark, she could barely find Kiba. All she could do was feel his mouth hungry against hers, making her heart ache.

"I missed you," he murmured in her ear, tracing her jaw with his lips. She managed to blink back the tears, willing them away. Being a jounin trained her to hide her emotions with greater ease but this was hard. She wanted so desperately to give all of her heart to him but her silly emotions for Naruto made it nearly impossible. Why couldn't she just let go?

Kiba had drawn her coat open and his hands were rough and possessive, yet sweet at the same time. He really liked her so very much so why was she being so unresponsive? His fingers moved against her skin and now over her chest. This was when she pushed him away, face flushed.

"Sorry," she murmured.

"Too fast?" Kiba didn't seem too put off by this.

"I—" Hinata wasn't good with words and found it easier to nod. Kiba gave her a reassuring smile and she could feel her heart breaking. "Okay then. I can wait." That was all well and good, but Hinata wasn't entirely sure she would ever be ready to give him that. Why couldn't she have fallen in love with him instead!?

The thunder rumbled overhead and swallowed up all her thoughts.

* * *

Thunder was roaring and the sky was drowning her but all of that was of little consequence.

This was it. This was goodbye. The beginning of the rest of her life started right here, right now. From here on, there was no turning back. She raised her fist and pounded hard against the door.

Who the hell was knocking? The only person that ever came by was Iruka-sensei. He stumbled over to the door with his head bowed. He really wanted to be left alone right now…He let the door swing open and was shocked beyond speech to find a drenched Sakura waiting on the other side.

"Can I come in?" Please say yes. Oh please, please, _please_ say yes. Naruto opened the door a little wider to grant her entrance.

_There's no other way. This is my choice. Goodbye, Sasuke-kun._

Naruto barely got the door shut before Sakura's arms wound around his neck and her mouth was moving against his. His eyes grew impossibly large and he couldn't hide the noise of surprise that snuck out his throat. After stumbling backwards a few steps, he was the one with his back against the wall while she was curved against him. That odd feeling was roaring through his blood and any surprise or protests he planned on making known were rapidly fading into memory.

His touches were shy and a little clumsy but that was mostly what made Naruto so endearing. He lived a little more awkwardly than most but his feelings were as true as they came. He was such a sweet boy and had treated her with such great care. Things would work out. It was painful but she couldn't live in mourning forever. This was the way things were so she had to make the best of it. Besides, from the feel of it, Naruto was thrilled to have her finally show him affection. If nothing else, she was certainly good at drawing out a man's sex drive. She could be so pathetic.

_This is Sakura-chan?_

Naruto tried to recall memories of her from their time at the Academy days, days when Sakura seemed so pure. But those questioning thoughts were quickly halted and tossed aside in favor of the here and now. The feel of her in cool, damp clothing against his flushed body was even making the ends of his hair tingle. Now Naruto, being Naruto, worked best on instinct and just let his body figure out what came next. His hands found their way to her hips and gave her a good shove forward. Needless to say, he was caught by surprise by the pleasure that followed.

Sakura almost wanted to laugh at him. It was so cute to watch the expressions on his face as he learned little by little just exactly what was going on. She was pretty sure that he'd probably received very little, if any, information on the facts of life so all of this must be pretty new to him. He didn't seem to notice his jacket as she dropped it to the floor, before pressing herself flush against him with her tongue twining with his. Even going about this blindly, Naruto's fingers somehow found their way beneath her skirt and that's when she froze.

Always haunting her. She couldn't feel Naruto's hand between her thighs, she felt Itachi's. It was Itachi's body against her. It was Itachi's tongue in her mouth.

With a startled yelp, she staggered backwards before collapsing to the ground with her hands winding nervously in her hair. "I didn't want—Oh god—He—" The tears were beginning to brew.

_What have I done?_

He hurt Sakura. He did something bad and now she would hate him. That feeling that dominated his lonely hours was clouding his thoughts and he couldn't find the right words to apologize. But why was she even making him feel like this when she was actually here? Normally it only got this bad when he was by himself so he couldn't be feeling lonely when Sakura was right next to him.

So even with her touch, he was still alone.

"I didn't mean to—" Naruto began. Please don't leave me. Please don't leave me alone here. Sakura's head snapped up, her tears halting as she stared at him with utter disbelief.

_Naruto thinks it's his fault?_

"Why are you apologizing?" her voice sounded more hysterical than she expected it to, "You did nothing wrong."

"But just now…" Why was Sakura lying to him? He could see plain and simple that he was the one who upset her.

"Just now…I remembered some bad things," did she really have the courage to say this? "Things _that_ man did to me and I just couldn't make the thoughts go away."

Naruto didn't look convinced. Actually, it looked like he wanted to cry more than she did. She beckoned for him to come to her and after a great deal of hesitation he complied. Sakura quickly pulled him into a tight embrace, despite how much that seemed to unnerve Naruto. "I want this, Naruto," she whispered in his ear softly, "I really want us to work. But all those memories keep—"

"Then we don't have to do the things that make you sad," Naruto decided, "I won't hurt you." Sakura nodded and the two let the silence descend. They would simply have to take it nice and slow. Everything would work itself out. She would be able to get past what she did with Itachi…And she would…

She could let Sasuke go for good.

She had no other choice.

* * *

He was always listless at times like these. With a sigh, Yanagi rolled off him and onto her side. This kid was a complete mixture of paradoxes. He would be so quiet but she managed to annoy him enough from time to time, just enough to have a decent bickering match every now and then. Whenever they came across an enemy, the passion leaking through every step towards his goal was one of the more intense feelings she could remember experiencing. She tried to distract him now and then. Tried to take away the negative feelings that would pour into the curse. But when she tried to coax him into any sort of physical intimacy, she knew he wasn't really there anymore. It was, of all things, starting to worry her. And she was not one for worrying.

"She must be a tough act to follow."

"What are you talking about?" he asked blandly before lighting a cigarette. She felt something akin to a grin threatening when she thought about what a bad influence she was on him.

"The girl ya left back home. Must give good head, or somethin'," Yanagi replied nonchalantly.

"She wasn't like that—" he growled, "There wasn't anyone back there." Great, he really dug a hole for himself now.

"Ya better tell me her name this time. No bullshit." She was very, _very_ good at letting people know she wasn't fucking around. It's been a year and he still wouldn't talk about her.

"It's nothing like you're thinking about," Sasuke answered with a certain hint of disgust, "There was just this girl."

Yanagi raised an eyebrow at him and he vaguely felt like a trapped animal. He'd been witness to a couple of her interrogations. They weren't pretty.

"Sakura…Her name was Sakura."

It had taken a whole damn year but she finally got the kid to say her name. That had to be a step in the right direction. Must really be missing her tonight.

"You fuck her?"

Oh, _that_ brought out a scowl.

"She wasn't my girlfriend."

"That' ain't what I asked ya."

She should probably go about this a little nicer than she was. He looked like he was two seconds from lashing out at her. Not that it mattered. They both knew she was stronger. With a resigned sigh, he forced himself to continue.

"I didn't sleep with her…The curse seal tried to make me…I didn't."

"Oh, it was _just _the curse seal?"

His eyes had the special talent of becoming as sharp and piercing as a kunai. Though she could tell his mind was still thinking about the girl. The boy may be a virgin but he and the girl weren't strangers in any regard. Well the best way to teach a lesson was to be blunt about things. After all, she was teaching this boy how to live without any pride. Silly shit like that got in the way of things. Especially for someone with a curse. Her hand went beneath the fabric and wrapped around him and he sat up with a gasp. "And I'm sure _this_ is the curse seal's fault, too…She must've been a pretty lil thing to get ya this eager."

His cheeks were burning with shame and he had the sense of mind to smack her good for this one, no matter how much he may have respected Yanagi otherwise. She kept him alive. She was great at keeping the seal in check, usually telling him he'd be sleeping out in the rain if he stayed all "splotchy," as she put it. She was supremely gifted in so many ways when it came to just _living_. Maybe that's why he hadn't yelled at her yet.

She was a complete idiot to think Sakura had that much power over him, though. She didn't. Their kiss was irrelevant. She was out of his life, never to be seen again. He had Yanagi and without her he had no chance of surviving the hell of hunting down Itachi. That was enough.

"You can think about her instead." Sasuke was caught by surprise when she said that and gave her the opportunity to straddle his lap. "Just close your eyes and pretend I'm her."

She was a complete and total moron. He wasn't thinking about Sakura. He wouldn't think about Sakura. It was her damn fault for reminding him of her in the first place. Though with his eyes closed, her bare skin against his didn't feel so unlike Sakura's. And when he was inside her, he absently wondered if this is what it would feel like if Sakura were surrounding him instead.

* * *

Even when the years would pass, Naruto could swear she didn't see him. Having Sakura spread out beneath him while offering her sweet kisses, she was always looking through him. Beyond him. Beyond the village. Across the forest and over the mountains and above the sky and beyond the moon to wherever Sasuke was now. Her heart was just so full already. Never for Naruto.

Always for him.

To be continued…


	8. Ch 8: Hunted

**Wasted Years**

by Mizerable

Ch. 8: Hunted

"What!?" Ino shrieked. He knew this wasn't going to sit well with her but it's not like he had much of a choice. They may have said "request", but he knew damn well enough to hear "order."

"It won't be so bad," Shikamaru answered, "I've been a jounin for over a year now. It's a pain in the ass but you know I can't turn it down. Jiraiya-sama himself asked me to do this."

"Yeah, but…an Anbu squad?" Ino sounded skeptical and horribly nervous about it. Why was he doing this? It would only increase the chances that he might…Doing this, he might…

"Why you?" She finally managed to ask, only to receive a shrug in response before he leaned back on his bed. Truth be told, Shikamaru was convinced there was something more to it than he was told. Even being ranked as an elite ninja, he was still left in the dark about a lot of things. Damn bureaucracies...They had been increasing the amount of Anbu over the past two years and it was starting to get everybody nervous. Something big was going down.

"Hinata joined a little while ago, too," he added.

"I heard," Ino replied softly. Soft-spoken, timid Hinata…No one ever expected that she'd become one of the top young assassins in the village. But then again, a lot had changed over these long three years. She ran into Shino by chance and was able to get a little bit of information about what his former team was up to. Kiba had become softer and less brash in a lot of ways, mostly just tired from everything. As for Hinata, her silence was no longer the nervous fidgety variety and more cold and steely. From the description, it sounded almost comparable to how Sasuke used to be…

Just what happened to everyone?

"Does Chouji know yet?" Ino asked, trying to take all of this in.

"No…You're the only person I've told. Not exactly supposed to let tons of people know," he replied and she looked a bit overwhelmed. So that brought out a new question from her. "Why me?"

_Why, indeed…_

On the battlefield, Shikamaru was often called "brilliant" or "gifted." But as far as real life went, he was a goddamn coward with a complete defeatist attitude. After all this time, he was still unable to convince himself he could ever win her over. Even though Naruto had managed to sway Sakura, Shikamaru gave up before the battle started. She was a new jounin and they were just reunited on the same team only a couple short months ago. But he was already leaving again on so many levels. Once he left on whatever insane Anbu mission they scrounged up, he wouldn't be seeing Ino again for a long, long time.

"When do you leave?"

"Dunno. Two, three days maybe?" Her face was starting to crumble and that was never a good sign. Ino was usually the type to get mad when she was upset about things. She only cried when things got _really_ bad. This couldn't possibly be one of those times. Right?

He was really leaving. Oh god…He was really leaving her behind. This might be the last time she would see him for a while. Even though he never gave a sign that he was interested in her, surely some part of him must care about her if she was the first person he told. She knew she was pretty bossy and stubborn but he had to like her at least a little bit, right? And Ino Yamanaka was never one to give up!

"Ne…Shikamaru?"

"Hn?" It looked like something else was making Ino nervous now. Great…

"I've never asked…what you think of me." Ino could tell her cheeks were burning crimson. She was being completely stupid, asking him something like this when he was probably anxious over his newly acquired Anbu status.

That got him to sit up. She did not just ask him that, did she? How the _hell_ was he supposed to answer that!? She was looking at him with expectant eyes, which were making him strangely nervous.

"You know…We won't see each other for a while." Ino nodded absently and, for some reason, she seemed closer now. He couldn't tell which one of them was leaning further towards the other. She didn't have her hair pulled back today and it was spilling into her face now. If he was going to have this conversation with her, he wanted to see her. His hand reached out to brush the strands away and tucked them behind her ear. He didn't expect to let his fingers linger there. He was in too deep now.

Time seemed to tick by a little slower with the electricity of anticipation firing in their veins. Tilting his head slightly, Shikamaru let his lips skim over hers. And she hadn't smacked him yet so she must be feeling generous. He sat back and noticed her shoulders were heaving. All right, she was pissed after all. Well she asked so he wasn't going to lie. What a complete pain in the ass this all was…

"You…complete _ass!_" she cried and finally raised her eyes to him, eyes that were filling with tears. All this time…All this time, he cared about her. Loved her, probably. And he hadn't done a damn thing about it. Now he was leaving for who knew how long with the fucking Anbu squad and _now_ was when he decided to kiss her? Why not two years ago? Why not four? What did she do wrong? She hung all over him constantly. She was always flirting with him. Wore clothes that grew tighter and more revealing everyday just for him. All that to get him to pay attention to her and now he was walking away.

Well that answered that. She was in no way interested, yet had the nerve to embarrass him by asking such a question. To be honest, he was nearing terror with his feelings over joining the Anbu when things were as bad as they were in the village. He knew he wouldn't be one of the lucky ones and was probably going to die out there far from home and alone. Why the hell did Ino do this to him now?

"I don't know why the hell you just asked me if you weren't gonna be happy about the answer. I've got enough on my mind so if you just wanna humiliate me, then just get out!"

He wasn't one to ever really raise his voice and he was pretty sure this was the first time he ever snapped at Ino like this. He wasn't a guy who argued a lot since it wasn't worth his breath. But his pride was hurting and it was painful to let her see him like this. He helped her stay strong, especially over these past three dismal years. He couldn't show his weaknesses now. Not to her. Not to himself. Weakness in the Anbu was a death sentence.

Ino was visibly shaking now and couldn't get a hold of herself. She was selfishly thinking about herself and now just hurt his feelings terribly. She wondered just how deeply his feelings for her ran, though. Even as she was gathering her things to leave, that's all she could think of. That, and if she ran away right now, she probably would _never_ see him again. Pausing at his door with her hand hovering over the knob, she let her bag drop to the floor and turned to face him again. She needed to do this before he left.

"Promise me."

Shikamaru had been sitting with his head in his hands stewing over everything. He just assumed she left until her voice echoed through the room. Immediately his eyes snapped up to look at her.

"Promise you'll come back to me."

_Ino…_

He knew whatever mission he was being sent on would be more dangerous than anything he ever encountered in his life. The chance he might die was extraordinarily high. But…

How could he ever say no to her?

"I'll come home."

_For you._

* * *

"What a complete waste of time," Yanagi grumbled. She felt vaguely compelled to sit on the table, but didn't feel very interested in wiping away the teeth scattered across the surface. She remained standing.

"If you're conscious enough to listen, you're conscious enough to talk. What are the Akatsuki planning?"

Hmm, she'd forgotten he was even here. Little Uchiha was leaning against the wall, behind the person in question slouched in the chair. She was almost startled the kid spoke, since he usually left all the work for her. Must be growing impatient. After receiving a gurgled curse as an answer, the suspect got a fine kick to the back of his skull as a reward. Yup, the kid was agitated today.

"Fuck it. He ain't talking," Sasuke growled before his kunai split the guy's throat wide and he stormed out. After working this no name Akatsuki informant for almost three straight days, they hadn't gotten anywhere. Looks like they were putting these bastards under a silence jutsu. Even if they wanted to tell you something the minute you caught 'em, they'd never say a damn thing. Perfect…

"Ya don't usually lose your cool like that," Yanagi pointed out once she met up with him outside. The light stung her eyes a tad and she never had much appreciation for the snow just outside Stone Country but those things were far from her mind. Something was off with her boy.

"You usually get answers," came the clipped remark. He deserved a hard fist to the jaw for that but she didn't feel like wasting the energy. It wouldn't have gotten her any answers from him. His trembling hands worked to light another cigarette but Yanagi knew it wasn't the cold affecting him.

"You's gettin' too involved," she stated, "After all this time, why're the emotions comin' back into the game?" He shrugged and that was the end of that discussion. Maybe the boy was getting a bit intuitive. The Akatsuki were growing fearful of how close the opposition was getting to the core. Strong jutsu on throw-away informants? They must be hiding something big. Things were about to get completely fucked up and the kid must be nervous now. After all, he might cross paths with his brother again.

"C'mon, kid. Let's get ya unwound a bit. Won't focus good like this."

Sasuke gave a vague nod and the two walked in the general direction of the local village.

* * *

"I noticed your addition to the Anbu," Kakashi stated flatly. Jiraiya looked up from whatever he was working on. Whether it was important Konoha business or the manuscript for his latest novel was yet to be determined. He did, however, look mildly surprised by his visitor's appearance. Kakashi wasn't one to come around often these days.

"It's not a problem for you, is it?" There was no malice in the question. Kakashi was a man to be trusted and his advice on situations was most often useful. The man shook his head in response. "No…They're qualified enough."

"You're not bitter that I didn't choose Naruto?"

"Hardly," Kakashi drawled out, "Even though he managed to scrape up a jounin ranking…If there's one thing Naruto hates more than anything, it's taking the life of another human being. The Anbu would be the last place he belongs." Jiraiya nodded in agreement. Naruto had grown up to be a decent kid and it was nice to _not_ have a ninja be so casual about killing. Most of the village was still stunned about how calm "Shy Hinata" was about everything when it came to death.

"I'd like to know why there is the sudden increase in assassin squads," Kakashi demanded without sounding particularly interested. It also sounded like he wasn't leaving without an answer. Jiraiya sighed. He knew this day would come sooner or later. Nothing got by Kakashi, except maybe this _one_ thing.

"I'm sure you're aware of the Aohi," Jiraiya began.

"Yeah. They're the pack of mercenaries hired to find out the true purpose of the Akatsuki and kill all members they meet. Also known as the expendable soldiers that'll do the dirty work for all the hidden villages. It's rather likely get they'll get killed for this cause without anyone giving a damn."

"Correct," Jiraiya answered with a heavy heart, "They're a bunch of nobodies who got promised that even though they're mostly death row criminals, they won't get executed if they complete this mission. But if any of them are lucky enough to survive this, they'll probably get screwed over by some other village."

"I'm not seeing where this is going," Kakashi stated bluntly, "It's a known fact that Konoha never got involved with them."

"That's true. We've never been associated with them, nor had we any reason to care either way. They haven't caused any harm to our village…" Jiraiya paused. He couldn't imagine that Kakashi would take this well. "That was until we began receiving reports that a former Leaf shinobi had joined them."

Even Kakashi could barely hide the surprise he was feeling. This couldn't have been that recent of a development, judging from Jiraiya's expression. Why hadn't he been informed until now?

"So they've got a missing-nin with them…Orochimaru?" Jiraiya shook his head. It would be so simple if it were that bastard. A psycho falling in with a bunch of loyal-less murderers wouldn't come as a big shock. No, instead it had to be…

"We've got reason to believe it's Sasuke Uchiha."

Kakashi's visible eye narrowed as his rage began to simmer. Was this some kind of sick joke? "It was established three years ago that he gave his life for this village."

"They never found a body," Jiraiya reminded him, "And would it really be much of a surprise that Sasuke would join the group that happens to be tracking his brother?"

No. It didn't come as much of a surprise. In fact, it made sense in a lot of ways. However…

"True, when Sasuke left, he was a mess. He was consumed with hate and revenge and probably a thousand other unpleasant emotions directed towards his brother. Of all the things Sasuke was though, he was never a traitor. He had a great respect for this village and would never choose the path of a missing-nin, the path the man he hated so much took willingly."

"I hope you're right, Kakashi," Jiraiya replied gravely, "It would be nice to think that Sasuke gave his life fighting that man…But until we receive anything stating otherwise, we'll have to accept the facts that he may have abandoned his home. Any Anbu who spot Sasuke Uchiha alive will likely kill him on the spot, anyway."

"For his sake, I'll pray he's already dead then."

* * *

She liked the anonymity of it all.

Working in silence without a face made her much more comfortable with her work. She wasn't carrying her family's name or any preconceived notions anyone held about her. She was behind the mask and all people could see were results, not her name.

Not her eyes.

She had just returned from a mission only to be sent out again a couple of days later. But that was of little consequence to her. The less time she spent in Konoha, the less she was reminded. Unlike most times when she came back, she actually saw Naruto this time. She was nowhere near him and wasn't about to go speak to him. She was just watching him. With Sakura. Their lips met briefly but that was enough for Hinata.

She knew they had been together for a couple years now but she managed to avoid them most of the time. It was certainly the very first time she saw them kiss, though. She immediately sought Kiba out and, strangely enough, it was for his own sake. He cared about her very deeply and after being in a relationship for these long three years, it was natural that he wanted _all_ of her by now. She was usually unresponsive or shy about such things, no matter how hardened everything else made her. But what was she holding out for now? She cared about Kiba. And since she knew her mission would take her away from home for a long period of time, why not give him that part of her?

Trying to be enthused about it seemed to make him immensely happy. The tired expression that usually made a home across his features drained away and that pleased Hinata a great deal. She never, ever wanted to hurt Kiba. She wanted more than _anything_ in the world to make herself fall in love with him. With Kiba tugging her clothes away and raw passion pulsing through her veins, she certainly hadn't meant to whimper Naruto's name.

When he sat back with the stunned expression on his face, it was slowly replaced by recognition as the truth dawned upon him. She desperately wished for her mask then. The injured look on Kiba's face as he looked into her ugly eyes reminded her of how much she hated being looked at. The relationship came to an end but neither had the words to say it.

"Naruto-kun" said it for them.

Now she was far away from home with absolutely nothing left there to return to. Her family may have hated her, Naruto may have ignored her, but losing her best friend was her own fault. But she had more important things to worry about now. She was on a mission now and the mission was what mattered. Distractions equaled death. Hinata, after all, would forever run from the truth that she made herself such an elite ninja just so Naruto would notice her. It was the only time she ever wanted to be noticed.

One of her teammates seemed a little uneasy as they raced through the snow-covered forest. She then remembered a new person was added to her squad, an old acquaintance from her Academy days. Shikamaru It had been a while since she last saw him, or any of them, really. She remembered him more prone to being laid back about everything, but he was pretty wound up tonight. Well, they would supposedly find their first set of targets in the nearest village and the best place to start looking for these people was the pub. Perhaps that atmosphere would help him relax a bit.

The first part of their task went off without a hitch. The targets were easily taken down behind the tavern nice and cleanly, leaving the squad presentable enough to walk right in for some drinks. Also known as scouting. Seeing an Anbu team without their masks on wasn't that much of a shock. The world had ninja. The world had Anbu. The Anbu would have a few drinks and that was that. No cause for alarm. It seemed now that the first step was taken care of, Shikamaru was comfortable with his place now. So everything was fine for now.

Hinata wasn't one for drinking. They would need at least one person completely on duty anyway just to make sure there were no complications. Anbu could drink. No one ever said they would always be left alone. Shikamaru seemed to enjoy brooding over his drink more than actually downing it, making it safe to say he would also be sober enough to stay alert with her. More or less. Scanning the place, nothing seemed too out of order. Most of the people seemed to be village natives with some traveling shinobi thrown into the mix. But no one was making trouble, or at least nothing that was out of the ordinary so far as pubs went.

Some drunken fool was arguing with another about an apparently fake hand at cards. Another was helping a friend forget some girl over a potent brew. Maybe that's what Hinata should be doing. Enough people did it when a relationship crumbled that it couldn't be completely ruled out as a remedy. If all it took to ease the pain over hurting Kiba and to help forget Naruto were liquor, then she would gladly bathe in it. She could count on Shikamaru to stay sober, most likely. Reaching for the bottle, her hand stopped dead upon sensing a horrible chakra. A horribly familiar one, at that.

She wouldn't need her Byakugan to show her where it was coming from in this place. Her eyes immediately were drawn to a darker, smokier portion of the room where a couple had secluded themselves to a corner. Hinata knew she was excellent at blending in and began to approach with extreme caution, her fingertips toying with the shuriken in her holster. At first, it was hard to see both figures at the booth. There was a woman, rather young but not particular in any way, straddling a seated figure's lap all while holding the smile of intoxication. It was probably just a dead drunk whore the obscured man picked up for the night. She possessed far too skinny of a frame to hold the kind of energy Hinata was picking up, anyway. Poor thing looked half-starved.

"Aww, c'mon Uchiha!" she whined, "I ain't doin' a damn thing with ya if you's gonna get all splotchy."

_Uchiha!?_

"You're obnoxious when you're drunk," he muttered and reached for the bourbon on the table. Black tattoo-like markings were burning across his flesh and after savoring his shot, he grit his teeth and pushed the curse away. The girl was now pleased with the results and leaned in to twine her tongue with his.

_Sasuke…That's Sasuke!_

Uncertainty was gripping her, not knowing if she should approach him alone or if she should get the others. On the one hand, if he was alive all this time and never returned home, that made him a missing-nin and she would have to kill him. But being who he was, he was likely a great deal stronger than her and could kill her. But if she alerted the others, he may catch on and escape.

Of course an unaccounted for assassin chose this time to launch an attack. Several kunai whizzing through the air sent the patrons scattering but the young woman with Sasuke easily caught them and casually tossed them aside without even turning her head. Hinata realized now she had underestimated her enemy. Now it was time for the Byakugan. Scanning the woman's body, she could find no special chakra. The girl didn't seem to be trained in a particular element. It was a safe bet that she likely practiced some sort of taijutsu more than anything else.

Reaching for her mask, the young woman now spotted her. More importantly, Sasuke spotted her. The recognition echoed through his eyes and something he whispered to the woman sent both racing towards the rear exit. Hinata didn't have time to alert her team. They were too busy with who they would later learn was an Akatsuki assassin. She was a worthy Anbu and would have to handle this one on her own.

She was able to follow their trail well enough through the snowy woods. It didn't seem like they were going out of their way to hide nor were they setting a trap of some kind, according to her eyes. She was torn between fighting with Sasuke with her gentle fist style, which he would likely mimic with his Sharingan or using the sword slung across her back. Somehow she felt there had to be something wrong with assassinating a hero that died three years ago. But death was death and she was an assassin so death was all she had to offer.

Her blade glided through the air and met unexpectedly with a similar one. She hadn't noticed the woman was even carrying such a weapon. How careless…

"That trick at the bar was cute," Yanagi mused, unable to tone down her smirk, "The sneak attack there yours, too?"

"Coincidental," Hinata answered briskly before pushing off. Both women stared across at the other, awaiting the next move. Hinata doubted Sasuke explained to this woman who she actually was.

"I've no business with you," Hinata announced, "I'm only interested in the missing-nin Sasuke Uchiha."

"Finally caught up with him, huh?" Yanagi stood down gave him a glance, "I guess this'd be your problem."

This was just unbelievable. How the hell did he manage to run into a Leaf Anbu all the way out here? And _Hinata_, no less! He could tell she had become immensely stronger since he last saw her. He really had no interest in fighting her, to be honest. He had no quarrels with Konoha. He had nothing with Konoha.

"There's no point in fight you," Sasuke announced, "It would do you well to just forget about this, Hinata."

He said her name. He remembered her name. Surely he remembered everything about home but he still chose to just walk away?

"Finding you alive means you have abandoned your duty as a Leaf ninja and chose the path of a missing-nin. I have no choice but to kill you." Even though she was the one saying those words, the taste of them burned her tongue and soured her stomach.

"If you fight me, you will die."

_You're an idiot, just like the rest of them back there…_

She vanished with the speed her training gave her. She was a great assassin, with blinding speed and great strength. She could defeat him. She could kill him. She could kill the man that was once a boy who would quietly stare out the window during class. As her sword skid over the snow, she pondered if he had been staring through the glass all those years ago and saw this very moment. His fist met with her stomach and she flopped across the ground before rolling to a stop and immediately rose to a crouching position. Attempting to blink away the black spots, she realized she wasn't hallucinating. His body was covered in the markings of the curse seal and now her sword was comfortably in his hand.

This would be nothing though. She was in the Anbu for a reason. She was a great fighter and would defeat her enemy. Everyone had already accepted his death back home. Killing him now would save everyone the trouble of revisiting those painful wounds again. She needed to kill him.

The chakra was pooling in her feet as she prepared to kick off and begin round two with him. Her foot barely took its first step before she was hoisted off the ground by the throat. Sharingan eyes watched her with cold calculation and she knew it was over. This was her death. "I'm sorry," he murmured before jamming the blade through her belly, "But I can't die here. Nor can I let you leave here alive."

Hinata's voice had always been soft but it could offer nothing when her mouth opened this time, save for a few crimson beads. Her toes made little rivets in the snow she could barely reach all while her life spilled from her speared form. Her body finally crumpled to the stained ground, after being slid off the blade with the help of a good shove by his foot to her chest. This was it. Her eyes that could see everything were growing bleary and it hurt to keep them open any longer. But if she was going to depart, she would have her answers on the way out.

"Why di—did you…betray the Leaf…?"

Betray? Hardly. He had reasons to leave there and everyone was aware of that all too well back in that place. He would kill the man that took so many Konoha citizens as well as keep himself out of there, for he was the dangerous one with this seal. It was better this way. Why the hell did Hinata have to find him?

"We all…believed in you…" It was getting harder to breath now but she could feel his Sharingan eyes observing her coolly. He suddenly seemed to remember the weapon in his hand and raised the tip above her throat. He'd obviously tired of her questions. Hinata waited for her hasty death that never came. She managed to force her eyes into focus and saw the woman gripping Sasuke's wrist, holding him back from delivering the final blow with only one hand.

"Are you really gonna kill this girl?" Yanagi was immensely grave. He could tell that much, even with the curse seal pulsing with agitation every second he let Hinata live.

"If she survives, she'll alert the Anbu and I'll have the whole fucking village hunting me down."

"So let 'em hunt." Yanagi was far from fazed by his angered stare, curse seal or not. "This girl's just doin' her job and she obviously can't fight no more. You kill her now and ya become no better than Itachi."

The cold realization settled in and he stared hard at Hinata, deep in thought. Timid Hinata, who would stutter an apology if _you_ bumped into _her_. The quiet girl from his class that was always too polite and kind for her own damn good. Why the hell she was mixed up with the Anbu, he wouldn't even begin to guess. He once said that he would sell his soul to the devil to defeat his brother. The curse seal owned his soul so what else did he have to lose? What would he lose by killing an innocent?

Life would be difficult if he didn't kill her. It was hard enough to survive and he didn't want to trouble Yanagi any more than she already was. He killed plenty of people up until now. All were associated with the Akatsuki; all people that had committed or were planning mass atrocities against countless citizens. Hinata was a loyal, dutiful shinobi fearing for her home and her people. It would be utterly meaningless for her to die, aside from furthering his own goals. Taking this life would put him on the road with Itachi and would lead him straight to hell. With a clenched jaw, he willed away the seal and let the blade drop into the snow.

Sasuke and Yanagi would disappear into the darkness, leaving Hinata upon her bed of ice shrouded in scarlet.

* * *

It was never meant for his ears. Kakashi wasn't sure he himself wanted to hear the news. But Hinata's description made it the undeniable truth. The hole in her stomach that had her lain out in a hospital bed only solidified the information even further. But absolutely none of that information was intended for Naruto to hear.

The whole room seemed to shake when Jiraiya's door slammed shut. The taut wire that was Naruto's temper was threatening to snap at any given moment but the only release the boy could find was slamming his palms against the desk to make sure he had the old man's attention.

"I have a demand."

Not a request. Not a favor he would like. A demand. Jiraiya had a feeling that, like his teacher, Naruto was not about to take no for an answer so he nodded to let the boy continue.

"Let me join the Hunter-nin."

To be continued…


	9. Ch 9: Apology

**Wasted Years**

by Mizerable

Ch. 9: Apology

"Quit pacin'. You's startin' ta make _me_ agitated," Yanagi demanded crisply, accented by the smoke curling from her lips. She was in a corner like most other nights leaning against the wall watching the boy. Though tonight Uchiha continued to walk back and forth, forward and back. His hands shook so badly, he could barely keep his hold on his cigarette. His hands were doing that a lot lately.

"You that afraid?" Well that finally got him to hold still for a change. Though his hands were still running away. "Them people from your village that powerful? Ya seemed ta make easy work outta that Anbu girl."

"It's not fear I'm feeling," he replied gruffly, "But I'm not relishing the idea of dealing with an entire village. We've already got our hands full."

"No. _I've_ got my hands full," she retorted and stubbed out the butt against the floor, "You just the stray cat I picked up. Ya could'a gone home a long time ago and not had ta deal with either problem." His face seemed to darken considerably. He certainly had a problem with being told the truth.

That maybe have been true of Sasuke, but that wasn't what he was hearing in her words. He heard his uselessness to her. Yanagi was a woman who spent her entire life completely and utterly alone. She could place no faces with a family long-since lost. She didn't have a village to abandon. She had no people to ever seek anything from. She'd only the road and deemed no one as valuable except herself. The truth of the matter was she could very easily continue the mission to wipe out the Akatsuki without his assistance. She never actually needed him there in the first place.

It was Yanagi who held the capability of killing Itachi, not him.

Yanagi didn't like the expression on his face one bit. In all honesty, she expected him to start sulking or maybe start arguing with him. After spending three years with the kid, he was a pretty easy read. But right now, things were rumbling around inside him and she couldn't name what any of those things might be. He decided to approach now, though why he would try to pick a fight was beyond her understanding. She learned he rarely came close of his own volition and it was very, _very_ rare that it would be to snuggle. For that, he would sit with her, giving her nervous glances before she pulled him close. Usually when he approached like this, it was to fight. He hadn't done anything that stupid in a long, long time. Back in those days he'd been a frightened, rabid animal that couldn't understand the more he struggled against his disease, the quicker it killed him.

* * *

It had been raining that day, as far as she could remember. In that place, time was marked by the rare appearance of the sun. What she did recall was the light had a tendency to constantly shy away from their path. She was also fairly certain that this weather was rather disagreeable to her traveling companion, who was overly pampered by a much milder climate. Plus the lack of eating was something new to him. Sure he probably ate very little back wherever he came from, judging from how he looked the first time she met him. But his appetite, like everything else, was dulled so far as things went back there as well. Now that he was truly struggling to live through another day, all his senses were sharpened to a finer point. This, of course, included his sense of hunger.

She contemplated hunting for something for him to eat but there were reasons they never did pause for such things. First and foremost, every second of the chase counted and needed to be spent precisely on that. Stopping to eat gave the enemy a little more distance. Next was the evidence. Even if they didn't use a fire to cook an animal, the blood would soak the air heavily. Animals had bones. Nuts had shells. Apples had cores. Eating anything, more often than not meant leaving some sort of remains. Anything left behind could signal their location. So that's what she told him and that's all he needed to know. He didn't need to know of her personal concerns.

They could not spare those minutes, minutes that may lead to her continually looming execution.

They didn't have the luxury to get around such simple problems, either. Bread and noodles cost money that they couldn't spend; especially since he had no idea she robbed people just to have the little bit they had. She wasn't about to part with her smokes and booze either, items that long since became familiar lovers along her travels. Uchiha had long since lost his annoyance with those two and even found himself partaking in the affair. Maybe he was right to say she was no good for him.

Even with the rain, she couldn't ignore the sweat dripping down his brow. The ragged breathing and his staggering steps were only confirming his likely fever. He hadn't grown accustomed to this life at all yet, constantly falling ill. But she couldn't stop to pamper him. He'd just have to grow tougher skin and get over it; she stopped getting ill when she was a child much younger than him. If she could live through it then so could he. The strangled cry was the only warning she received before he hit the ground.

With a frustrated sigh, she approached his crumpled form with a full lecture in mind but the words died in her mouth. The boy was grasping at this neck while those curse markings scorched his flesh. It wasn't the first time she had seen it since that day he stabbed her a few short months ago. Since then, she was often a witness to his way of "handling" it. Thus, why he his arms were continually wrapped in bandages. The startling sharp pain he would render upon himself would usually give him enough focus to fight off the curse.

His other hand reached for his kunai but Yanagi absolutely was sick of this. He wasn't going to defeat _anything_ at this rate. Did he have a death wish?

Her foot connected sharply with his jaw and sent him sprawling flat on his back. Pulling himself into a crouching stance, he couldn't hold back the snarl accompanying his Sharingan glare. The seal burned across more of his flesh but she didn't show anything on her features over that.

"This is gonna stop now. What you're doin' to yourself's ridiculous." His lips curled back just like the rabid dog she thought him to be.

His blood boiled with indefinable fury. All he wanted was to defeat his brother yet he somehow managed to get pulled into a world that left him starved, sickly, and always recovering from another fight. Every time he even attempted to fight back against an opponent, the curse seal reacted painfully. It was as if Kakashi never trained him to control it in the first place. But since Yanagi managed to defeat any enemy anyway, it normally didn't matter.

It was every night he could feel her dissatisfaction with him as he dressed her latest injuries, most of which were nothing to be considered serious. But most of which could have been avoided if he were of any use. Being around her was a constant reminder of how utterly weak he was as a shinobi. And right now, his body was just itching to prove itself. Surely he had to be worth _something_. Surely he had the power somewhere locked inside to defeat Itachi.

Yanagi just happened to be the object of his scorn.

But even with the Uchiha blood, even with the Sharingan, even with the curse seal…She was still winning. Blow for blow, she matched him. More importantly, the hits she connected were stronger. Why was she so beyond his reach?

Both completely scuffed up and bleeding, Yanagi could hardly deny she somewhat enjoyed it. A good fight always made her blood sing, especially since it seemed she was the victor. Poor little Uchiha could barely sit up and was now propped up against a tree. She could almost be amused by the sheer idiocy of it all if he didn't have the curse still scrawled across his body. At least his eyes appeared a bit more contented. Taking a seat somewhat gingerly by his side, she gave him a long stare. "Just what the hell am I gonna do with you?"

She raised an eyebrow when he leaned in for a kiss but his lips met with the palm of her hand. Ah, not too shocking. The curse did weird things to him so it shouldn't be a surprise if he felt a tad lusty after a decent fight. God knows she was guilty of that after a good scuffle, as well. Today, however, she was not having any of this.

"Ya want me, Uchiha? Fine, I don't care. But not when ya look like that. Get yourself under control and I'm game."

He didn't look pleased and instead mumbled a request for a cigarette. All the kid needed was a distraction. A good lay or smoke burning his chest. Anything to make his mind find some small focus away from his mental and physical anguish. He never made a pass at her after that, whether under the power of the curse seal or in full control. Though the seal came out less and less now that it had someone there to kick its ass all the time. And she really threw a beating on him sometimes. Other times she'd just hold his hand and talk him through it. Whatever it took to bring him back to his senses.

More importantly, she was teaching him to control his emotions. When he was objective about their work, things always ran smoothly.

The smoking seemed to help, too.

When she decided sleeping with the kid wasn't a bad idea, he lacked the interest. She would make a move on him and he would stare at the ceiling. It really felt like he wasn't there, or maybe that she wasn't. Either way, she never got his attention until she told him to think about that girl he left behind. The girl must have been beautiful. Or at least didn't have her skin cross-stitched together.

* * *

Now that he was crouching before her, she couldn't help but snap back into reality. It's sort of comical how the passage of memory can so easily distort the passage of time. "Kid, if you're tryin' ta pick a fight, you can sleep out in the snow for all I care. I ain't in the mood for it…" His hand was gentle as is caressed her cheek, her hair spilling over his fingers. Her eyebrows arched at him in surprise. He was a lot of things to her and kind wasn't usually one of them. She definitely had a plan in mind to question him on it. But that was before he kissed her.

Well that was a first. He never initiated anything when it came to this sort of stuff so she was justifiably anxious over what he had planned. Was he just lonely? Or maybe he did hold a great deal of fear over facing the Leaf shinobi. There was a certain degree of urgency that she could sense in him as he tugged off her clothing. It also seemed he was going to have her right here against the wall without even uncurling from their crouched positions. Not that she really minded. The grain of the wood clawing at her back wasn't wholly unpleasant. It crossed her mind that maybe this wasn't the best idea since his curse was making a guest appearance. Maybe. It was hard and frantic but it didn't feel like rough sex. The rawness of it, the emotion of it gave it a sweeter edge.

It felt like an apology.

* * *

"He's leaving, Ino. He's really leaving me." Her eyes were blank as she spoke, but Ino knew it was when Sakura _didn't_ cry that she was hurting the most. She didn't know what else she could do, save for rubbing Sakura's back reassuringly. She certainly didn't know how to ease the pain when a loved one suddenly left. All she was capable of now was cursing her stupidity for not asking Shikamaru years ago about how he felt. The mission already sent Hinata back home and straight to the hospital and no one was telling just who exactly did it to her, but it must have been someone immensely powerful. She didn't want Shikamaru facing someone like that.

But none of this answered the riddle as to why Naruto was joining the Hunter-nin. Naruto _hated_ killing people. None of it made any sense!

As if Sakura read her mind, it seemed she was about to try and explain his reasoning. Though Ino was absolutely positive the girl was just as clueless about the whole situation.

"Naruto and I…We haven't had sex yet." Okay, that wasn't what she expected as a reason, at all. "Whenever we get too involved…I can't stop the images from coming into my head—"

"You don't need to say it," Ino knew where this was leading now. Sakura may think she had everyone fooled but it was obvious how much the attack still weighed on her mind, the attack she blamed for being the catalyst leading to Sasuke's death. The death she still blamed herself for.

"I must look so pathetic to him…To Naruto," Sakura mused wryly, trying to pretend it didn't hurt, "Every time he tries to show me he loves me, I start crying and shoving him away."

What could Ino say now? Three years of telling Sakura that none of this was her fault hadn't sunken in at all.

"Naruto may be a little dense, but he knows you've been through a lot. If he didn't care, he never would have stayed with you this long," Ino reminded her.

"Except he's leaving now."

"No, that's not…" That wasn't what Ino meant, at all. It was always another misunderstanding…

"I've tried so hard to become a good shinobi…Kakashi-sensei told me a long time ago that I had a talent for genjutsu. I trained so hard to learn it, even asking Kurenai-san for extra training…"

_I tried so hard to fool everyone. _

_I've tried so hard to learn a counter-justu to the illusions _that man _used against me that night._

"Even with all my work, I'm still only a chuunin."

"So you're a chuunin!" Ino's reprimanding tone took over, "There's no shame in that. Iruka-sensei's 'only a chuunin' and you still respect him, don't you?"

"Yeah, but…"

" 'But' nothing! You're a respectable Leaf ninja. What do I have to do to make that sink into that dense skull of yours?"

_Make everyone stop protecting me._

_Keep them all from dying for me._

"He's probably going to chase after _him_…Naruto is going after _that man_ just like Sasuke-kun had…"

Sasuke.

It was known as a taboo word when it came to Sakura. Everyone knew she visited the memorial often, even if she never mentioned his name. Ino felt a little sorry for Naruto, who like Sakura said, was probably running off to be heroic and tragically stupid for her sake. And if Naruto was chasing Sakura's attacker, then it was likely that he wouldn't be coming home again. Ino couldn't help but wonder if Hinata's attacker had been the same man. Then again, if it had been then Hinata would likely be dead by now. It was a miracle in and of itself that Sakura survived that night three years ago.

What if Shikamaru was ordered to find that man?

"Sakura, I don't know what I can do to make you pain any easier. Saying 'I'm here' probably won't cut it—"

"Will you be?" Ino hadn't expected that answer, either. "Will you stay here?"

Ino was always stronger than her and always could stand on her own two feet. She could forget her love for Sasuke, grit her teeth, and her hard work made her a jounin. Yet she still found the time to mind Sakura, as well.

By now, Sakura couldn't tell if it was herself or Ino that she hated more.

* * *

Sasuke had been deceiving everyone all these years.

Days later and Naruto was still fuming over it. He regretted having to leave Sakura behind but after that bastard made her suffer so much, it was all for the best. It would break her heart to hear what Sasuke had become. When he told her of his plans, it hadn't been easy. Of course the tears came along with her questions. Why was he joining the Hunter-nin all of a sudden? Naruto told her it was to find the man who left her feeling so sad all the time.

Naturally, both had a different man in mind but it couldn't be helped. It's not like he could go after a "dead" man. Even though it hurt to make Sakura think he was going after her attacker, even though it hurt to make her think he was facing the one who "killed" Sasuke…There was no way in hell he could tell her the truth. It was better to let her think Sasuke died a hero. God knows he wished the jerk had gotten himself killed years ago.

But Naruto was still left with more immediate questions. Sasuke was easily able to disarm an Anbu soldier so he had to know what to expect when fighting him. And there was only one person he could ask about it: Hinata Hyuga.

It felt a little weird walking towards her hospital room. He saw her now and then in the village but had barely said a word to her in three years, not since the day he made her cry. The same day they received the news about Sasuke…Damn it! He wasn't going to think about that right now. He had to think about facing Hinata and getting important information for his mission.

Facing Hinata wasn't going to be easy. Watching her from afar, it was impossible not to notice that she changed over these last three years. Just like everybody else. Of all the people in the village that became great assassins, he didn't like that she was one of them. It left a sour feeling in his stomach to think that a shy girl like Hinata would become an expert killer. She may have struck him as a little odd when she stuttered and blushed every time he used to talk to her, but he was sure he didn't like the new Hinata either. She had been good with all her herbal remedies…She probably should have become a doctor or something. Why did she need to do this to herself?

Naruto knew it was time to push these thoughts away, as well. He couldn't think about these sorts of things right now. With his hand on the door, it suddenly opened and left Naruto face-to-face with Kiba. Naruto opened his mouth to say hello but instead took a fist to the jaw. "What the _hell_ was that for!?" he shouted. He was about to be nice to the ass!

"You son of a bitch," Kiba mumbled, "All this time, she…Fuck it. Forget it." Naruto was about to go storming after him but a cold look from the nurse on duty made him think otherwise. Besides, Naruto didn't have time to waste on that jerk. He needed to leave on his mission soon. But that certainly didn't mean he wouldn't bitch about this first.

"Geez, why are you dating a jerk like that?" Naruto griped as soon as he entered the room. Nothing like a good distraction to ease his way into meeting with her.

"He's not my boyfriend," came Hinata's curt response while she stared out the window. Why? Why was Naruto showing up now?

The puzzled look he was giving her meant he probably didn't know she and Kiba broke up. Thus, he didn't understand that they broke up over him. If only she hadn't said his name…

"So what brings you here?" Hinata's voice was bland, like unpolished steel. Naruto was right to think the new Hinata would be hard to accept. "I know who hurt you," Naruto was amazed how stable his own voice sounded under the scrutiny of her eyes, "I joined the Hunter-nin to go after him."

"Then what are you doing here? Shouldn't you already be leaving?"

She couldn't help but be cold to him. Three years swimming in a sea of blood just for him to even say hello, but he comes to her now. He came to her because she happened to be the one who found Sasuke. She was still unimportant to him.

"I was wondering if you could tell me some stuff to expect. I don't wanna face him unprepared." Her eyes hardened and he felt pretty foolish. Words wouldn't prepare him for anything. Hinata was Anbu, making her prepared for anything. Maybe he insulted her somehow by making it sound she wasn't ready to face Sasuke.

"I already gave my report. I'm sure that should be sufficient." She didn't want to talk to him anymore. How was it that someone who hadn't even been a part of her life for these past years still made her heart ache? The more she spoke to him, the more she could feel her tongue struggling over her words. The more she could feel her cheeks heat up. She supposed it was pretty admirable that he, too, would become something he hated in order to meet with his long lost teammate. So that he could protect the woman he loved…

That thought was enough to pour ice in her veins.

"Are you really going to leave Sakura-san behind over this?" Naruto flinched over hearing it out loud. It somehow sounded harsher aloud than in his head. "He might kill you."

"No way! I've trained so hard…hard enough that I even got the permission to go on this mission! There's no way that bastard could defeat me!"

"I only lived because he _let_ me. Against a full-fledged hunt, he'll grow desperate—"

"Nothing you say can change my mind," Naruto cut her off. How could Hinata even argue with him about this? After what that jerk did to her…This wasn't going to get an answer out of her. It was better to just get out of here. Halfway out the door, her voice hit his ear much like her style of attack. It was soft and he barely noticed it but it left him hurting all over. "Can you kill your friend?"

"We were never friends."

_I hated you…_

Naruto tried to suppress the memory. Sasuke had risked his life to save him that day, without even giving it a second thought. He never once admitted it, but some part of Sasuke must have cared about his team even a little bit. He never would have been willing to throw it all away that day against Haku otherwise. He never would have held Sakura close that day at the hospital.

If he hated this place as much as it seemed, he would have killed Hinata immediately and spared himself the trouble of being hunted by the Leaf.

"Why did he let you live?" Naruto asked, approaching the bed again.

"He didn't."

What? Hinata was obviously alive. Plus she just said she live because he let her so what the hell did she mean? Sensing his confusion, she continued.

"He's traveling with a young woman. She convinced him to spare me."

"A woman?" Naruto hadn't heard about this part at all. Why would Sasuke have a woman with him? "Is she a shinobi?" Hinata nodded. She wondered how Naruto would handle all the observations Hinata made about the two.

"Yes…Her build is very misleading but she was quite strong," Hinata was still amazed how much force the woman put behind simply blocking an attack. But now to finish her analysis… "But it seems they are also lovers." Telling Naruto she found them practically undressing each other while intoxicated at a bar would be a bit much.

Naruto couldn't choke back the bitter laugh. So Sasuke finally found a girl…Would she be like Sakura? That hug at the hospital all those years ago proved to Naruto Sasuke must have cared about Sakura a great deal. The bastard was never one to show emotion to people. A normal response from him to Sakura would have been something along the lines of saying she was fortunate not to have died and that would have been the end of it. It was forgivable if Sasuke had died like the hero they all thought he was. Why did he hug her and then never come back?

Why didn't he just come home?

Hinata was rolling up her shirt and peeling away her bandages, despite Naruto's protests. He had doubts all along but she wanted to wipe them away before he left on this mission. It would get him killed otherwise. "This is what he's capable of." Even with the sutures, it was an ugly puncture through her gut. It must have been painful. Naruto's fingers unconsciously reached out to touch it but her pained gasp left his fingertips brushing against the skin around it.

"It was a powerful hit," Naruto murmured, not feeling completely compelled to move his hand. Sasuke really did plan on killing her. There was a chance that Naruto wouldn't be standing her with his hand on Hinata's stomach, talking to her in this room. She could have become a hero. He didn't like the thought of never again watching Hinata from afar, something he did more often than he realized. He had run the words over and over his head to apologize for making her cry all those years ago but never knew how to give them to her. She became so hard from all her years serving as a shinobi, something heartfelt and stupid like that probably wouldn't make a difference to her anymore.

"When you face him, that woman might not be there."

Your chance at being spared might not be there.

"I'm sorry," Naruto stated flatly, surprising Hinata, "I never apologized for making you cry."

Just as quickly as he said it, he was gone and Hinata couldn't help but respond.

She cried.

* * *

They caught up fast.

Perhaps he shouldn't have listened to Yanagi that time and just killed Hinata. It didn't matter how much he didn't like the idea of killing her, but it couldn't be worth this. Even if Yanagi's judgment was usually right, they would now have no choice but to kill the ninja chasing them. There were too many for them to run from and get out of it alive.

"I thought being in the Aohi meant they couldn't kill me as a missing-nin—" Yanagi's hand clamped over his mouth, her eyes telling him they would have this discussion later. If they even had a later. Of course, it decided to rain again now that they ran back to Cloud Country. Obviously, Fire Country was not one of their options to flee into.

The Leaf were certainly adamant in making sure he was terminated. After dodging some Anbu, they found themselves now running from the Hunter-nin. Sasuke couldn't quell his uneasiness in being reacquainted with those needles again and had so far steered clear of them. Just as he and Yangai prepared to move on, an ambush struck. She jumped one way, he in the other and in less than two minutes he had no idea where she was. Just friggin great.

His Sharingan brought out, he was able to locate where the Hunter pursuing him was located and drew the attacker out into the open. Something gave him the feeling that the person wasn't all that against being seen here in the clearing, either. More unsettling was how familiar this person's chakra felt. Well, the person was from Konoha so he probably had met whoever it was at some point. Though with the face concealed behind a mask and a hood pulled over the head, this person remained a complete mystery.

This one didn't seem very interested in wasting time, either, and was also very good. But it would be best just to get this over with as quickly as possible. Drawing out the curse seal while remaining objective had become easier, thanks to Yanagi. He couldn't think about defeating Itachi since Itachi wasn't there. The Hunter-nin was and that was whom he needed to concentrate on.

A few quick hits sent his opponent flying backwards until his back slammed into a tree. Despite his curse craving this one's blood, Yanagi would be furious if he killed a Leaf. He didn't want to bring any problems to the Aohi; everyone in it already had enough to deal with.

"Stay down. If you get up, I will kill you." Sasuke turned away. He needed to find Yanagi now. That had been the plan until a needle whizzed by and grazed his arm.

"Sasuke, you bastard!"

He froze in place. That voice…there was no way...Ignoring the cut on his arm, he whirled around to face the figure slowly climbing to his feet. Pulling the mask away, Naruto glared at him with furious eyes.

"Naruto…?" The curse seal faded away from the shock. _Naruto's__ a Hunter-nin?_

"Why the fuck did you become a missing-nin!?"

"What business is it of yours?" Sasuke replied bluntly. There's no way Naruto could begin to understand what any of this was about. He wasn't about to drop his guard no matter how long they knew each other or for being teammates.

"You arrogant ass…" Naruto mumbled, barely able to contain his rage, "We thought you were dead!"

"I think I was." That's what it felt like three years ago, waking up to meet Yanagi for the first time. Leaving everything he ever knew, suffering that horrible defeat…yeah, it felt an awful lot like dying.

Naruto couldn't _believe_ this guy! He was just so fucking cool about everything. And he had those weird marks again! Sakura explained to him that those were because of something that creepy snake guy Orochimaru did to him. Naruto didn't get it too much but he knew those markings were no good. Maybe that's why the bastard was so damn skinny. The guy had lost a lot of weight over the time they knew each other, but he really was just all bones now.

And now the bastard was lighting a cigarette!? When the hell did that start!?

"If you're gonna kill me, then try and kill me," Sasuke stated as the flame took to the tobacco. Naruto seemed pissed enough to try just that, even though his hands were trembling enough to make the needles clang together. He was morbidly curious to see it the dead last idiot had it in him.

A scream ripped through the air and both partied lost momentary interest in each other. Moments later, Yanagi arrived helping along a Hunter-nin while both carried fresh injuries. Catching her glance, Sasuke could read "Akatsuki" in her eyes. Laying the injured Hunter near Naruto, she looked up at the two standing with a grave expression on her face.

"We got trouble."

To be continued…


	10. Ch 10: Bargaining

**Wasted Years**

by Mizerable

Ch. 10: Bargaining

They had trouble, all right. That Hunter-nin Yanagi dragged back here looked like he was on the way out while she had her usual amount of scrapes. The problem wasn't her injuries though; it was the fact that Naruto wasn't going to buy the idea of a third party killing a member of his squad.

"Uchiha, ya best be gettin' them markings out and about. We's about ta get some unsavory company," she ordered coolly. Leave it to Yanagi to remain under control in a situation like this.

"Like hell I'm just gonna let him do that!" Naruto snapped, "That seal makes him even more of a threat." The outburst earned an appraising glance from her crouching form. From the fury in his voice, she imagined he must have known her boy long ago. It didn't sound like things between the two were friendly, either.

"I know you's here ta do your job," Yanagi spoke up, "But we ain't got time ta play. We got us possibly multiple Akatsuki assassins on our tail—"

"Bullshit," he snarled, "What makes you think I believe _you_ didn't wound my teammate?"

"What proof you got I'm lyin'?" she retorted. His eyes narrowed and a strange sort of chakra was starting to flow from him. It was an older power, more primitive. More dangerous. It felt a tad like the curse.

"We're leaving now," Sasuke announced, his eyes locked on Naruto's. This was not good. He had seen what this energy was capable of, his memory recalling the long-since past fight with Gaara. Naruto had been positively ferocious in that battle and, to be quite honest, he wasn't so sure he wanted Yanagi to face something like that. If anyone could mach her in fighting stamina, it was Naruto.

"Let's go, Yanagi." Sasuke extended a hand to her, sending a wave of confusion through Naruto. This woman was pretty important to him, after all. What the hell was so special about her? What had she done to make Sasuke abandon his home and stay with her? Why was she better than his fellow shinobi he used to fight side by side with!?

Why the hell did he leave!?

Just as her fingertips brushed against Sasuke's palm, Naruto sharply yanked her back by the hair and immediately pressed a needle against her jugular.

"I'm not fucking around here, Sasuke."

Shit. _Shit! **Shit!**_

Yanagi never got herself caught like this. Then again, maybe some part of Sasuke didn't believe Naruto would take a hostage. Naruto was a lot of things but cowardly was never one of them. Why was he using her as a bargaining chip?

"You complete idiot," Sasuke growled, "She's got nothing to do with this."

Fiery.

Naruto's eyes were a fiery blend of crimson and orange, rather than their standard shade of blue. Often times Sasuke thought his own eyes were playing tricks on him when Naruto's changed color. Hallucination or not, any time his eyes shifted color meant he would be a lot stronger than before.

"Uchiha, what the hell're you doin'? Get outta here!" Yangai shouted, ignoring the increased pressure against her flesh, "I'll catch up later!"

"Give up," Naruto ordered. Sasuke could feel the seal burning again and gladly welcomed the pain. This idiot had no idea what he was getting involved with.

"I have no intention of doing any such thing." Yanagi was hurling curses at him now, though he supposed he couldn't blame her for being angry. It was rare that she was taken by surprise and she probably didn't have a plan for this scenario. If he didn't know any better, he could swear she was concerned about him.

"Did you know that if only the esophagus is cut open, it takes about twenty minutes for a person to choke to death on their own blood?" Naruto drew a trickle of crimson for added effect, ignoring his urge to vomit.

_Show me, you son of a bitch. How much is she worth to you? Was this one woman worth turning your back on everything?_

He wouldn't die here. Yanagi wouldn't die here. Sasuke would make sure of that. The curse seal painted its way across his body and it hungered madly for Naruto's blood. They had to survive this and he wasn't about to let this dead last moron take away their lives here. He just had to stay calm and in control, otherwise the curse seal would take over mentally and then they all might end up dead. He just needed to remain calm.

"Surrender or I slit her throat."

"Quit hiding behind a woman and come fight me for real."

Those words played on the desires of the Nine Tails that lusted for battle. The craving for Sasuke's blood was drowning out all rational thought and the fight was all that mattered. He shoved Yanagi back hard against the tree trunk and as her fist swung towards his face, he secured both her palms above her head before his needles drilled straight through flesh and bone to pin them against the bark. Yanagi didn't scream at him, too surprised that her strength didn't surmount his. The rawness of his power left her feeling a little nauseous, though. Feeling Sasuke's curse drawn out in full coupled with his bitterness was overwhelming her as well. There was just so much hurt on both sides.

Yanagi spent most of her life without people. She couldn't understand how a person leaving would bring out such disturbing emotions, emotions that held no place in a fight. It was beyond her as to how these two young men were able to transform into monsters when facing each other.

* * *

"Are you sure of this?" Jiraiya sounded incredulous over the whole situation.

"There's no doubt, sir," Anko replied flatly, her voice devoid of humor, "The Akatsuki have set their plans in motion to wipe out every single hidden village."

"Do they even have enough men to complete such a task?"

"How many do you think they even need? Looking at the inner circle alone, almost every last one of them is listed in the books as S-Class criminals."

"They're probably just arrogant enough to succeed…Call back all the shinobi who aren't already in range to kill important Akatsuki members. We're going to need everyone we can get to protect our village," Jiraiya ordered. Maybe now would be a good time to locate Tsunade…

"And what about the Aohi? They've put up decent numbers against the Akatsuki."

The Aohi…It would be difficult to trust a bunch of criminals-turned-mercenaries. He was certain they were fine when it came to fighting but that was the problem. Desperate people like that might take advantage of being taken into a hidden village and attempt to bring down those in charge. No leadership meant no execution orders. But there was…

"Bring the Uchiha boy and his traveling partner here. I hear she's the leader of the whole lot."

"Uchiha? Are you joking?" Anko was stunned. After the kid went missing for three years and then deliberately attacked an Anbu, Jiraiya wanted to bring him back to Konoha? "He's a dangerous threat to the village. The Hunter-nin may have even killed him already--"

"That's highly unlikely," Jiraiya retorted, "And if he is as dangerous as you say, that Hyuga girl would be dead...Besides, we don't have much of a choice. We'll have to risk it for the sake of the village."

"So we're just going to let that boy walk away when it's all over?"

Jiraiya sighed heavily. He knew damn well Anko didn't want to end up killing the kid. Being a bearer of the curse seal, she likely felt an affinity towards the kid. But she was also a very dedicated shinobi and would take his life, given the order. Sasuke Uchiha was probably just a lost cat far too wound up in his own world of misery, not a criminal like his brother. That day he left, he probably thought he was going to die rather than completely abandon his home like this. But there was no denying Sasuke attacked a Leaf shinobi. According to Hinata's story, she survived because that young woman with Sasuke persuaded him to let her live. Plus Hinata described what sounded like the curse seal being used in his attack. Anko was right to think he was dangerous.

"If he gives us the slightest reason, Sasuke Uchiha will be executed on sight."

Anko nodded once before turning to leave and carry out her orders.

* * *

After three years, it was as if she was watching Sasuke fight for the first time. This was a great becoming, a change into something a little less than human. Or perhaps, a little more human. It was difficult to tell what was man's true face.

She knew he was able to perform fire jutsu but his power was bordering on obscene. The fact that it wasn't fazing the young man he fought was even more unsettling. The hits they were landing on each other possessed a force to shatter bones and rupture organs…They were really going to kill each other. Yanagi continually tugged her hands forward, desperate to free herself from the bindings. Despite the fact that she wasn't making any progress. Those Akatsuki bastards were close. She could feel it. They didn't have time to waste here fighting over some grudge.

Watching the bluish chakra forming in Sasuke's hand almost filled her with an unfamiliar sense of betrayal. He had been hiding such a powerful attack all this time? She never once witnessed his "Chidori" after three years of surviving together. All this time, she had been led to believe he gave her his everything. She had no idea that just one of these attacks ate up about half his energy. Or such had been the case when he was younger. Considering he never connected this grand attack when fighting Itachi, Sasuke didn't have a lot of faith in it since then. The fact that he sometimes couldn't muster the energy to walk some days also played an important role in its lack of use.

If Sasuke was going in for the kill, then Naruto decided it was his time as well. Over these last three years, he had managed to bother that pervert-sennin Jiraiya enough to learn an important technique. After all, how could anyone say no to the kid who needed to learn techniques that also taught chakra control when he was the holder of the Nine Tails? One never knew what would happen if Naruto could no longer control the monster within. It was sort of ironic, that while he let the wisps of energy spiral and weave together into a ball in his hand, he was losing his grip on that tremendous "red" chakra.

Both launched forward with battle cries as their energy slammed hard against one another, pushing and burning and agonizing.

* * *

This was for never saying goodbye.

This was for never moving on.

This was for forgetting and not forgetting.

This was for always being a fool.

_This was for not being there._

* * *

The heat given off by the explosion felt searing against Yanagi's skin and she could do nothing but clamp her eyes shut to protect herself from the flying debris. Waiting for the smoke to clear was excruciating. Was that Hunter dead? Did Uchiha—did they both--?

A figure approached through the haze and her heart was screaming in her ears with anticipation. Who was it? Who survived!?

Her eyes came into focus enough to see an outstretched hand gripping a kunai, a ring in plain sight on his finger.

_Akatsuki!_

No time to think about the pain. With a bend of her arms and a turn of her hands, Yanagi lifted herself for enough leverage to land a powerful kick to his hand and sent his weapon flying. It didn't matter that the needles were scraping at the back of her neck now. Using her momentum to pull her body horizontal despite her protesting wrists, her feet locked around either side of his head and brought him down with a mighty twist. Almost there now…Yanagi grit her teeth as she kept her feet planted on the shoulders of her kneeling opponent and let the bark dig into her own shoulders. Throwing her hands forward with as much force as she could muster, she freed them from their restraints and planted them palms down against the tree. Flipping herself up the trunk, she stared down the vertical path to the ground and wrenched the needles free from the wood as she somersaulted into a freefall. Of course, the needles left her fingertips and hit the two other hidden assassins before her feet connected to her already dead attacker's chest with a thud.

Now where was Uchiha?

The blast made his whole body ring and above all else hurt. His hearing was a little messed up and the smell of blood and burned ozone around him was repugnant. Well he and Sasuke always wanted to fight each other for real, though somehow it wasn't as fulfilling as he imagined it would be. At least, not for his human side. Nine Tails, on the other hand, was in ecstasy. Stupid fucking fox…The tightening in his stomach was telling him something dangerous was about to hit and instinctively his kunai came up to block it. Expecting to see enraged Sharingan eyes, he could only find an unfamiliar face staring back at him. However, this person's intent to kill wasn't any less and it was putting Naruto on the defensive.

He vaguely recalled that woman saying something about Akatsuki assassins…

No time to worry about who said what when someone is trying to cut your heart out. Still wielding the kunai in one hand, his other hand came up with a set of needles to add to his arsenal. The fight seemed to be at a stalemate and, despite how tired that damn attack earlier made him, it seemed he would have to draw out more of the Nine Tails. He didn't have time to waste on these guys.

Concentrating heavily on his opponent, Naruto was startled when his back hit the warm body of another person. Sasuke glared over his shoulder, his eyes saying "later" before returning attention to his own attacker. Back to back in a fight against unrelenting opponents after a three-year absence seemed almost surreal. So caught up in the here and now, it nearly appeared as if no time had ever passed between the two as they finished off the pack of enemies together.

Leaning against each other facing opposite directions, both waited for the other to make the first move. Would they wait it out and see if there were more Akatsuki? Would they continue their own fight? Their fingers danced with anticipation as they gripped their weapons tighter. Whoever took the next critical hit would probably lose this.

"Stop this fight immediately!"

Naruto perked up, recognizing the voice of his squad leader. Why the hell would he stop? He had orders to kill his target. It didn't matter if it was Sasuke. It didn't! It didn't matter how well they fought together against those Akatsuki bastards! Sasuke—That bastard! He—

He noticed Naruto let his guard down. Spinning with his blade aimed at the side of Naruto's neck, he never could deliver the finishing blow after his wrist was held in place. As his arm was lowered, he found himself staring into Yanagi's dirt-smudged face. And, for once, her anxiety seemed to be on display. It took him a moment to realize her wounded hand was coating his skin with sticky blood while she held onto him. This poor woman…What she suffered through because of him…

"I'm assuming you must be Captain Yanagi of the Aohi," Naruto's own captain stated and received a curt nod from her. Naruto could barely hide his surprise. He heard a story here and there about the Aohi and its leader. The only was to describe those accounts were "frightening," at best. The Aohi was not home to kind people.

"We have received word that the Akatsuki are planning large-scale attacks against all the hidden villages," the man continued and only Naruto seemed surprised, "Jiraiya-sama of the Leaf would like to make a proposition to you."

"Oh?" Yanagi didn't seem very impressed. What the hell were they wasting her time for? She had more immediate things to worry about, such as getting to these bastards before they hit the villages.

"If you defend our village from this attack, you will avoid execution—"

"That's already been the deal on the table. You came here just ta tell me that?"

"And we will also cancel the execution order on Sasuke Uchiha."

That seemed to catch everyone's attention. Naruto could have seriously hurt someone over this. Why would they let a dangerous missing-nin go, even if it was Sasuke?

"Our village never made any agreement with the Aohi about granting asylum to missing-nin should they join your numbers. If you do not comply, he will be terminated here on sight."

So he was the bargaining chip now? This must be where Naruto gained that tactic. What would Yanagi do in this case? Sasuke knew she hated favoring one village over another and hated taking orders even more. Hopefully she would be a smart girl and just walk away from this. She had bigger fish to fry than protecting some village she had never even seen. Please let her leave.

"Well, guess I ain't got much choice. I've got a few points I'd like ta argue, but I gotta get ta Konoha for that. It's a deal, gentleman."

Sasuke opened his mouth to yell about her stupidity but it wouldn't have made a difference. They were both too damn stubborn to listen to each other. He would ignore the fact that he would make the same decision for her sake if he were in such a situation, just as he had tonight. With a sigh, he let the curse recede.

Naruto was furious. Absolutely fucking furious! It was bad enough he didn't get to finish his fight but of course things had to get worse. Sasuke was coming back to Konoha, the same little village where Sakura was. If she found out…

A Hunter began to clamp handcuffs around Yanagi's wrists and she was not a happy individual about this at all. "Ain't that a bit much?"

"You haven't proven to be at all trustworthy."

"Not like I'm going anywhere. I wanna see your village."

Sasuke rolled his eyes. That was only going to make them more suspicious since they didn't know Yanagi had no intention of attacking it. They had no idea she only wanted to see a place where the sun still shined sometimes. As Naruto fastened Sasuke's handcuffs, he dropped his voice intending only for his prisoner to hear.

"I don't care about the orders. If you go near Sakura-chan, I _will_ kill you."

Sasuke could only respond with a frigid glare. He was not returning to Konoha on a social call. This was strictly business and it was to repay his continually mounting debt owed to Yanagi. He had no intention of seeking out Sakura and was not planning on making any effort to find her. Sasuke would rather not meet anyone else from that place again. As soon as the fight was over, he would take off to wherever Yanagi was heading.

He would not see Sakura again.

* * *

Everything smelled of preservatives, incense, and stale pages.

Restraining the sense of uneasiness as well as the urge to sneeze, she pushed onward through the odd displays to reach the counter in the back. Waiting there was an elderly woman bent with age and ailment. Her whited out eyes had long since lost their sight but the visitor doubted the woman was blind at all.

"Well," the old woman croaked, "It's been quite a long time…Since I had the pleasure of meeting with such a pretty young lady in my shop…"

Her slow speech served both to unsettle her and make her rather irritated. She didn't have time to waste on cheap flattery.

"I don't have a lot of time…"

"Ah yes…Trouble has gripped your village…Has it not?"

She could only nod, though the woman most likely knew that already.

"And you come seeking power…"

"My home is in grave danger—I don't have the strength needed to protect it."

The old shop keeper seemed to contemplate for a good while, making her patron more and more nervous. "What I have to give…requires great risk and responsibility…"

"I—I know. But I—"

The woman raised her hand to signal a need for silence. She unfolded her hunched form from her seat and slowly shuffled over to a shelf. After a moment of perusal, she selected a dust-soaked scroll bound by a crimson ribbon.

"This…should be sufficient…Sakura Haruno."

* * *

Yanagi took a deep breath of Konoha air as they passed through its gates under the first signs of day. It was a cozy looking place, very prosperous. Yanagi was tempted to ask Sasuke if the death of one man was worth giving up such a posh life. Judging by the tired look on his face, she decided against it. Traveling back to this place all while recovering from his fight with that Hunter plus the Akatsuki proved to be a rather draining experience for him. It would be a real test to see how tough her boy became over these three years while back in his hometown.

Every man has his reasons when abandoning his home.

Just as the sun cracked over the mountains, the two in custody were ushered into an office. "So you must be the man in charge," Yanagi drawled.

"That I am," Jiraiya answered gruffly, "Ah, Sasuke Uchiha, how kind of you to join us."

"Popular, ain't you?" Yanagi murmured to him and he restrained the urge to give her a sharp elbow to the ribs.

"It was hard to say no to your kind invitation," Sasuke replied coolly. The scrapes, bruises, and torn bloody clothing filled in the sarcasm. Yanagi was a tad curious to see what injuries lay beneath his clothing, the wounds she would forcibly have to tend to at some point. That Hunter was a powerful young fellow and she couldn't help but be intrigued by him. He would likely prove to be a valuable asset in the fight against the Akatsuki.

"I'm assuming since you actually agreed to come, you must already know why you're here," Jiraiya began, "I'll take it you have no objections to our agreement?"

"Actually, I got quite a few," Yanagi stated flatly, earning incredulous looks from everyone aside from Sasuke, "But I'm gonna keep this short. Say somethin' goes wrong and we don't prevent this Akatsuki attack…you wanna kill me? Go ahead and try. You wouldn't be the first. However, win or lose, I want you to drop all charges against Uchiha."

"What!?" Both Naruto and Sasuke were stunned by her proposal.

"For someone who has no allies here, you're quite a brat to make such a tall order," Jiraiya pointed out, almost amused by her. When he heard they were bringing in the leader of a mercenary group, he hadn't expected her to be some starved, raggedy little girl.

"I don't really give a shit what ya think I be. If we lose in the end, I'll take full responsibility for both myself and Uchiha. Either ya let him walk away when this is all over or the deal's off."

"And what do you think you could even do against us?" a Hunter accused.

"Get in our way and this entire village gets torched before the Akatsuki can even see the smoke risin'." She dropped her unfastened handcuffs to the ground just to strengthen her point. No one controlled her.

She was out of her mind. Yanagi was absolutely out of her fucking mind! She was threatening one of the strongest shinobi forces over his freedom!? Sasuke wanted to shake her until some sense started rattling around in her brain. "Yanagi—" his jaw snapped shut when she raised her hand to cut him off.

"I don't owe this village a damn thing. Ya want our help, you'sgonna play by my rules. Fuck with me and I'll bury you."

So that's how this slip of a girl became queen of the criminals. She wasn't the bluffing type at all. She was arrogant only because she backed her word. If they crossed her path, she wouldn't hesitate to massacre everyone in her way. It may have been a mistake to bring her into Konoha...

"You don't leave us with much choice, do you…Fine, Sasuke Uchiha is yours to keep. But if you should fail, you will lose your life."

"I got no intention of failin'." Yanagi turned quickly on her heels and stalked towards the door, Sasuke following close behind her and discarded his own handcuffs on the way out. Neither felt the need to stick around and listen to Naruto argue with Jiraiya about the decision. Hunter-nin or not, Sasuke knew Naruto thought he'd seen the extent of Yanagi's strength already. He didn't know she felt generous towards the Hunter-nin. She could have very easily killed all of them, rather than choose to run and hope they wouldn't be stupid enough to keep chasing. But they were hunters so they could do nothing but follow their "prey."

Even so, why would she—

"Yanagi," Sasuke's feet refused to carry himself any further. Not until he had answers. "Why did you make that request?"

"You really is an idiot sometimes," Yanagi mumbled while lighting a cigarette, "I just bought your freedom."

"That's not what I asked you."

Yanagi almost wanted to laugh at having her words thrown back at her. Clever little brat. "I removed your restraints. Forget your memories. Forget the people here and focus solely on this fight, otherwise you gonna to get yourself killed."

Sasuke felt a little dizzy. Beyond her barbed tongue and cold heart was a young woman with the compassion of a fucking saint. "You're already in enough trouble. You would go so far as to die for me?"

"I ain't gonna die," she answered indignantly, "Ya owe me for all this."

"How can I repay you for any of this?"

_How can I repay you for continually saving my life?_

Yanagi resisted the urge to snort. She knew the kid felt it was solely her efforts that kept him alive over the past three years. It was kind of sweet, as far as a boy in denial went. If she had anything to do with it, he wouldn't picture a forgotten girl every time they fucked.

"Uchiha, face this without regrets and survive this. Just fuckin' live through it."

To be continued…


	11. Ch 11: I Knew

**Wasted Years**

by Mizerable

Ch. 11: I Knew

His fingers grazed over the inscription with a detached sense of fascination. The etched words painted him in a much more flattering light than he actually deserved.

"What's it say?" Yanagi asked, crouching close to the stare at the markings she couldn't interpret.

"It says I died," Sasuke replied numbly. He had died three years ago, hadn't he? He couldn't deny how much of a struggle his time away had been, making him wonder if he had been in hell all along. That would make Yanagi the devil after all and perhaps that was an accurate description. He did things with her, to her, that he could never have imagined. Stole. Killed. Fucked. For all intents and purposes, she owned his soul and he had no choice but to follow her every order. Coupled with that deal she made with the Leaf, Sasuke was completely hers.

"Does this say "death"?" Yanagi inquired, her fingers echoing his path. Sasuke blinked in surprise, momentarily forgetting she couldn't read. It was in these moments when he would realize none of this was a dream, nor was he dead. If this were hell, the devil would never struggle as much as she did.

"It's my name," he murmured, "This stone is where the names of Leaf shinobi are carved after they die in battle." Yanagi nodded faintly, her eyebrows drawn in concentration. She startled just a tad when Sasuke took hold of her fingers and traced them along each stroke, sounding out each part. Yanagi's eyes focused intently on the characters, her fingertips memorizing the feel of his name against her skin.

Not once had Yanagi ever indicated she actually wanted to learn such things. She had survived this long without it. It certainly didn't seem like something important to know by now. Besides, as long as he was there, she claimed he could do all the reading for her. Sasuke could admit he was somewhat humbled by her interest in his name. For such an unruly and wise woman, it was amazing how easily she could remind him of a child. Not that he would ever tell her such a thing.

"It's a little odd to find you here, don't you think?" Sasuke didn't even bother turning around to face the voice. He already knew who it was. Yanagi glanced over her shoulder only to find one eye looking back, as the rest of the man's face was concealed.

"I guess it is strange to visit my own grave," Sasuke mumbled. Yanagi's hand was reaching for her shuriken but Sasuke put a hand on her shoulder to call her off. "What brings you here, Kakashi?" Sasuke kept his voice even and ignored Yanagi's raised eyebrows. She said once she wanted to meet Kakashi… "I doubt you're here to pay your respects."

"No, I did come here for that. Heroes deserve respect." Sasuke didn't miss out on the sarcasm. Obviously Kakashi wasn't counting him as part of that class.

That was very much the truth. Kakashi unfortunately wanted to believe Sasuke was dead, not a traitor. How a man could turn his back on everything and everyone for so selfish a gain was beyond his understanding. He knew it was impossible to stop a man bent on revenge; he could perhaps even understand it. But the fact that Sasuke most likely fought and survived Itachi and still chose not to return home angered him a great deal. A young man who understood the feelings of abandonment and loneliness better than anyone must have realized how greatly his absence would affect those left behind.

"I told you before that the worst thing a person could do is betray their friends," Kakashi stated flatly.

"I had none to betray," Sasuke answered, eyes narrowed.

Sasuke really had transformed into something terrible. He had always been cold in his younger days, but Kakashi would have thought Sasuke still had some kind feelings for his former team, just as they had of him. Three years later and Kakashi couldn't forget the sound of Naruto's screaming the day he was told Sasuke died. Nor could he forget the amount of times Sakura would start crying and not even realize it. She could be training or eating or walking and the tears would just start flowing but she never noticed after hurting for so long. But by now, Sakura had no tears left. She poured out everything that she was and was just empty inside now. Both of them suffered so greatly over a person that didn't even care.

"I ought to kill you right here."

Kakashi noted the Aohi leader didn't seem too pleased with that statement. He knew he couldn't do a damn thing now that Jiraiya made that deal with her.

"I wouldn't go makin' any threats if I was you," Yanagi declared, her hand reaching for the handle of her sword just in case.

"I'm aware of the situation," Kakashi answered gruffly. Well, no one was lying when they told him how protective she was of Sasuke.

"Why do you defend him so fiercely?" Kakashi doubted she would give a straight answer if he flat-out asked of her feelings for Sasuke. She didn't seem to be the emotional type, though perhaps she had a better sense of loyalty than her companion. She was the leader of the Aohi, after all. They may not be the most savory of folk but even they must share some sort of common bond of camaraderie. She was likely just protective of her crew.

Though right now, his question seemed to have the gears in her mind turning. Perhaps she heard all the other questions that had been spoken within the one he asked. It would be interesting to hear what she had to say.

Why, indeed…

"I protect Uchiha 'cause he's one of my important soldiers," Yanagi stated, not surprising either men who heard her. It was the truth. He was so very valuable to the Aohi and he was a great help to their efforts, but something about her answer felt empty. Like she was missing something important.

"And he's as close to a home as I got."

The words came out though she wasn't even sure that's what she meant to say. They felt real enough, despite her surprising sense of insecurity. Kakashi's visible eye widened slightly, before relaxing into his usual lazy gaze. So these two were probably more than just traveling companions, after all. Even after all this time passed, Kakashi found himself dumbfounded that Sasuke would indulge in such a relationship before he killed Itachi. Whether they loved each other or not was irrelevant. Whatever Sasuke felt for her kept him by her side for three long years and likely built a strong sense of trust between the two. Trust that he never even gave his own teammates.

Now that his immediate anger resided, he could observe how relaxed Sasuke seemed with this woman. Though he got the feeling she could be relaxed no matter who was nearby. It wasn't something he would want to admit, but perhaps the fact that Sasuke got out of this village and away from the place that haunted him so terribly…Maybe he reached some sort of peace within his troubled world. That was all well and good, but it was no wonder Naruto was as upset as he'd been after returning home. The relationship these two possessed was bound to stir up some painful emotions in some cases.

"While I doubt you have intentions of remaining here…When this fight is over, leave Konoha and never return."

"First you get pissed at me for leaving, now you'll be angry if I stay?" Sasuke couldn't help but sound a little irritated. What the hell did these people want from him? "Are you afraid I'll really become like him and destroy your precious home?"

"It'll break her heart if she finds out you're here," Kakashi declared with a somewhat somber tone. He would not stand to see that girl suffer anymore. Sasuke ground his teeth and restrained himself from cursing about this. Just like with Naruto, his former teacher was horribly protective of her. Was it really necessary to bring her up all the time? It's not like they were ever involved…

Yanagi's curiosity was piqued again. It didn't take a genius to figure out what girl Kakashi was talking about. What a shame…She wanted to meet this Sakura.

Approaching footsteps signaled the arrival of another person and everyone's attention was drawn to that direction. "Oh, Kakashi-sensei. I haven't seen you lately," Sakura greeted, incense sticks and flowers nestled comfortably in her hand. With everything that had been going in regards to unearthing the Akatsuki's plans, she hardly had any time to see her teacher.

Kakashi felt what could probably be as close as he could come to panicking. There was no way to distract Sakura long enough for those two to leave. There was nothing he could do to stop this. How had he not sensed her approaching?

"Sensei, what's…wrong…"

The items once clutched by her fingers scattered across the ground. The words she tried to form in her mind and force out of her mouth came out as small, incoherent squeaks. It couldn't be…He was…He…

"Sa…su…ke…kun?"

Her voice trembled. Her body trembled. She felt as if she might faint at any given moment. Was this an Akatsuki trick? Was she hallucinating? Dreaming?

Yet another mysterious arrival. Uchiha sure knew a lot of people. Whoever this girl was, she was rather beautiful. Soft features, expressive green eyes, fair skin. The girl probably came from a rather comfortable home. Judging by the shuriken holster strapped to her thigh, it seemed the girl was also a ninja. Somehow Yanagi found that a bit hard to believe. What was with all the pampered kids in this village?

She looked pretty damn upset right now, too. Her boy wasn't fairing too well when it came to his former villagers, considering how upset they all became as soon as they saw him. It sort of made her wonder what he did that was so wonderful that when he was gone, they were left with such immense pain. Maybe she should ask this girl.

"Sakura," Sasuke murmured, his features completely blank. If he was feeling anything right now, he wasn't letting it show. Yanagi, however, felt something jolt within. This was the girl. This was the girl Sasuke left behind. Every time they fucked, he was seeing this girl's face. Somehow, she felt less intrigued to learn about this Sakura now they were face to face.

"How—How are—" The words simply wouldn't form. She couldn't even ask it.

"Sakura, you need to calm down," Kakashi spoke gently, "There are important things you need to be told." She gave the vaguest of agreements and continued to stare wide-eyed at Sasuke.

"Obviously, Sasuke didn't die as previously thought," her teacher began and she couldn't help but feel her lips begin to form a hopeful smile. He was alive. Sasuke was alive!

"Instead…" This was going to be so painful for her. He really didn't want to be the one to always break bad news to her. But by now, the truth was something she earned. "He chose the path of a missing-nin…abandoning his home."

Her face cracked as her short-lived happiness dropped away. There was no way. There was no way he would do something like that!

"That can't be true…" she whispered, "That can't be true! Sasuke-kun wouldn't just abandon the Leaf like that!"

He knew this wouldn't be easy for her to accept. Sakura was such a gentle and kind girl. She could never imagine the one she held such deep feelings for could become a traitor. In some regards, she was more naïve than Naruto.

"I know it's hard for you to accept…But he's returned not as a Leaf shinobi, but as a member of the mercenary group Aohi."

Sakura's mouth opened to argue with him but she paused. Why wasn't Sasuke defending himself? This was obviously all a lie.

"Sasuke-kun?" She could barely even sound out his name. Her feet felt like lead as she numbly moved closer to him. Her shaking hand reached out to touch him but lost her courage just as her hand hovered above his cheek. It wasn't even until now that she was able to notice the scrapes on his face, the torn clothing. He had been in a fight recently and it must have been a fierce battle. Noting the details, she was able to take in the fact he grew a great deal, as the top of her head now only reached his chin. He was so thin…

How much did he endure since he was last home?

Sasuke felt as if he shouldn't be as amazed as he was. Why the hell was she still so obsessed with him after all these years? He treated her like dirt constantly when he was around and then left her and the entire village behind. Did she spend all this time stupidly grasping to the last time they saw each other. She must have realized it didn't mean anything. She had to.

"I'm only here to fight the Akatsuki. When it's all over, I'll be leaving this place for the last time," Sasuke confirmed.

Sasuke was a traitor.

Sasuke abandoned the Leaf.

Sasuke abandoned her.

The hurt was filling up and overwhelming all her senses. She spent three years mourning him and he most likely hadn't given her a second thought. All she suffered through so unnecessarily was forming into a completely unfamiliar and blinding anger. Instinctively, her hand came up and connected to his cheek with a resounding slap.

Of all the people he expected it from, he never thought the day would come when she would be the one to lash out at him. Not that he hadn't necessarily earned it. He really hadn't expected her to be the one to hit him so hard that his teeth were left rattling, the familiar tang of blood filling his mouth. She had become much stronger since he last saw her.

"You bastard!" she cried, "How could you do this to us!?"

He knew damn well to hear "me" instead of "us."

"I believed—All this time, I believed in you, Sasuke-kun!"

Sakura took off in the other direction, ignoring Kakashi as he called after her. She needed to get as far away from there and him as possible. For all his faults, she never expected Sasuke to betray her. And yet her heart had belonged to him all this time, while he never cared for her.

Why did Naruto ever choose to stay with a girl like her?

Why was she such an idiot!?

Sasuke could sense Kakashi's anger but it really didn't register in his mind. Sakura was a fool to cling to those emotions over these long years, emotions he never returned and never could. He lost control a few times physically and that was it. He was an idiot back then, anyway.

Though somehow after seeing her again, he couldn't help but feel the strangest hint of loss.

* * *

Sakura prayed he received the call-back order and had already returned. Screaming his name, she pounded incessantly at his door. A very exhausted and startled Naruto finally answered and Sakura all but barged into his home. "Sakura-chan?"

"Naruto, he's—he's—"

She knows!

He could feel himself growing more and more angry by the minute. He made it damn clear that Sasuke was a dead man if he went near Sakura. Screw whatever deal Jiraiya made! He'd kill Sasuke for this. That Aohi girl wasn't strong at all, anyway. He had managed to catch her easily enough. The village would survive well enough without the help of those two.

The recognition on Naruto's face was unmistakable. Sakura could barely get her words out but he seemed to already know exactly who she meant. But that was impossible! How would Naruto know Sasuke was alive? If he did, he would have told her immediately.

"You…you already know?"

"You could say that," Naruto said and pointed to the band-aid on his cheek.

Naruto and Sasuke fought? But Naruto was away on a mission. He was chasing the one who hurt her—

"Who was your target?"

Naruto exhaled heavily and leaned against the wall. He hadn't wanted to tell Sakura any of this. It was only going to upset her. But it didn't look like he could hide it anymore. If he didn't tell her, someone else probably would.

Someone like Sasuke.

"You see…I found out that Sasuke was the one who injured Hinata…" Naruto began softly, "He was declared a fugitive and I joined the Hunter-nin to find him."

He could see Sakura had slivers of hope on her face amidst her confusion and hurt. She probably thought he wanted to bring Sasuke home and make everything the way it used to be. God, he didn't want to say it. He didn't want to tell her. But being Naruto, which entailed being hotheaded and speaking before he thought, he just blurted it out.

"I'd gone looking for Sasuke with every intention of killing him."

What?

Sakura was hurt and betrayed over discovering the truth about Sasuke; that much couldn't be denied. His leaving finally forced her to realize he probably never cared about her at all and that hurt more than anything else. She didn't care if he felt the need to leave his duty as a Leaf. Sasuke was troubled enough and maybe serving here was too much of a burden for his weary soul. But not even a letter. No goodbyes. He was just gone and would leave again, regardless of what she felt.

Because she was and would always be nothing to him.

But she didn't wish death upon him by any means. In these three years, it wasn't as if he threatened the Leaf in any way. Her mind instantly recalled Hinata, though. Maybe she was just being foolish and idealistic again. Maybe he had become something horrible, an enemy.

But that didn't explain—

"You would kill him?" she whispered, "You would kill Sasuke-kun?"

"He's a traitor."

"He was our teammate!"

"That never mattered to him, now did it?" Naruto spat, "He's only alive because that pervert sennin made a deal with him and the Aohi. If given the order, I'll be sure to kill him myself."

Who is this?

This is Naruto?

"You hate killing," Sakura reminded him.

"And I hate him a whole lot more. He betrayed the Leaf and his duty as a shinobi. He deserves to die for it."

He deserves to die for hurting you so badly.

"He must have had some reason for leaving. Sasuke-kun wouldn't just abandon us without a purpose," Sakura's hands were balled into fists now. She couldn't tell if she wanted to just start crying or scream now.

"A ninja doesn't get to choose whether or not to leave. We serve the Leaf and what he did goes against everything being a shinobi stands for!"

"Do you hear yourself!? You make it sound like we're just a bunch of tools for the village!" Sakura shouted, "That goes against everything _you_ stand for!"

Naruto couldn't find his voice now. Was he the one saying these things? He never even acknowledged that he believed such things. Somewhere along the way, he lost his freedom in the midst of the lives he took in the name of Konoha. Perhaps now that he had killed at all, he could finally look back and realize how disillusioned he was with his work. He never wanted to be a killer. He never wanted to be a Hunter. He just wanted someone to see him.

Even if meant being acknowledged by an opponent just as each died.

"Sakura-chan, I know he hurt you by leaving…But why are you still defending him?"

"Because I still love him!"

Her hands flew up and covered her mouth, as if she could push those words back inside. But she couldn't. She couldn't take it back. She never wanted to admit it, even to herself. She was sure she loved Naruto and knew she would be devastated if she were to lose him. But no one could ever captivate her so greatly, as Sasuke had. Now the words were said and she couldn't change anything.

She opened her mouth to apologize but Naruto waved her off. He pulled Sakura into a warm embrace and hid his face in her hair so, for once, she couldn't see him. "I know…I've always known." She held him tightly, so tightly, choking back sobs against his neck.

"Sakura-chan…I don't think this is gonna work anymore."

* * *

The dream was over.

It was completely senseless for Sakura and himself to stay together anymore. She tried to love him and some part of him recognized that, the part that wasn't hurting. Sasuke hadn't even been back to Konoha for twenty-four hours and he managed to screw up everything. And, of course, the bastard didn't give a shit.

Either way, Naruto wasn't pleased about being dropped into the cold water of reality again. He supposed that's what brought him to this place. If Leaf ninja knew a cure-all medicine, it came in the form of many overturned shot glasses. Naruto wasn't a drinker. He definitely saw no purpose in eating or drinking anything that tasted that nasty. But he was pretty fucking desperate by now. Anything to help him run away from his crumbled illusion didn't seem like such a bad idea by now. He had a couple shots already but wasn't near being drunk yet. After all, he never figured out how extraordinary his metabolism was because of the Nine Tails energy.

But something was starting to bother him. He kept feeling as if someone was watching him. It was slight at first but he really couldn't ignore it anymore. When he found the person sitting at the end of the bar, he was more than surprised to see Hinata with a drink in her hand. Her eyes dropped away as a remnant of her shyer days and she returned attention to her drink. She never even noticed Naruto moved until his shadow was cast over her.

"They let you out of the hospital?" he asked. It was a simple and easy question.

"Yes…I'm well enough to return to duty now," Hinata answered slowly. Alcohol tended to strip away the iron walls she had so carefully constructed, leaving her a little more vulnerable. And here she thought liquor was supposed to make people bold…

"He's back, you know…Here in Konoha."

Hinata gave a curt nod but chose not to voice her opinion on that. Kiba and Shino had been concerned enough when they both learned this afternoon that Sasuke was not only her attacker, but that he was now in their village. Personally, she wasn't all that worried. When she found Sasuke, he was a man who acted out in desperation. He didn't want word getting back to Konoha of his existence so he attempted to kill her and would have if that woman hadn't intervened. But now that the secret was out and he was even forced to return, whether she lived or not was of little consequence. She doubted she had anything on an individual level to fear from Sasuke. Whether he turned out to be a true threat to the village was another story.

"It looks like you faired better against him in a fight, though," Hinata stated rather humorlessly.

"I guess," Naruto replied with a shrug. Hmm, perhaps the fight didn't go as well as it seemed. Hinata was tempted to use her Byakugan to see how extensive his wounds were. Instead, she chose to—

"Do you want to stay for a few more drinks?"

Naruto took a seat by her side to state his affirmation. He wasn't really sure why he accepted her offer, since he kind of wanted to be alone tonight. But, in all honesty, Naruto hated being alone more than anything. More so than killing. More so than Sasuke. He wasn't too sure what to even talk about with Hinata. That time he visited her in the hospital seemed so surreal now. She was so cold at first, then showed him that painful wound, and even let him rest his hand nearby it on her tummy. He also apologized for upsetting her all those years ago…and of course fled afterward. He couldn't explain it but the whole experience just left his cheeks burning and it was pretty damn embarrassing. He certainly didn't want Hinata to see that.

Hinata could sense Naruto was getting lost in thought and she almost didn't want to bother him. But it was a rare chance for them to even have the opportunity to speak with each other. She wasn't about to let it go to waste, no matter how nervous she felt inside. She kept it simple, only asking about his thoughts on the Akatsuki. It was a neutral subject, a safe subject. He explained how he fought some supposedly "weaker" members, probably mere messengers and informants, and that even they were quite powerful. It made her wonder what the more powerful shinobi of the group would be like. It certainly wasn't a thought she cared to entertain any further.

Perhaps it was the liquor's fault, but the question slipped from her mouth.

"Why are you here instead of with Sakura-san?"

A look mixed partly of regret and partly nostalgia passed over his features. It was a look she could never once recall seeing Naruto display.

"Things…didn't work out with us."

They broke up. Hinata didn't need him to explain the reason why. With Sasuke back in town, old wounds were likely torn open. Hinata almost got angry over it, thinking of how Sakura betrayed Naruto's feelings all these years. Almost. But she was certainly no better. In fact, she did exactly the same with Kiba.

This called for another round.

Tonight she and Naruto shared the bitter drink of longing.

How very ironic.

It was also ironic that tonight was the night where the two of them just talked for a change. Unable to touch the topic of relationships, the conversation was pulled into an introspective light. Fears and flaws and changes that they saw in themselves were drawn out.

"I don't want to be so alone anymore."

"I only wanted to be stronger."

"I killed to be noticed."

It was the same. All their worries had been the same. Naruto wondered how he never noticed this before. Were he and Hinata always this similar? It was just another reason he wished he could take back these past three years. If he had fixed things between them back then, would they be in this same place in life now? Would anything have changed?

Maybe he was actually drunk by now. Otherwise he must have lost his mind to ask such a question.

"Hinata, it's late…" Naruto announced as he stood, noting how she tried to hide her displeasure over his inevitable departure, "Do you…Do you want to come home with me?"

Hinata's head snapped up to look at him with wide, disbelieving eyes. Did Naruto just ask—She nodded her head dumbly and followed him out of the pub.

He had to be drunk. Why the hell was he bringing her home? It was already pretty late and by the time they got to his little apartment…Maybe he should just walk her home. He didn't want the poor girl to stay out all night, especially since she just recovered from that nasty injury. Part of him absently wondered if it left a scar. She had such pale skin so it would be pretty jarring if there were a mark there still. He wondered if she would show him—

He'd lost his mind. He'd completely lost it. He never had thoughts like that except in regards to Sakura. He had to be drunk. That's it. He needed to send her home. Naruto blinked and realized he was already opening the door to his own place. When did they get here?

It was a small apartment but the empty ramen packages and general untidiness definitely placed Naruto's personality throughout. Hinata was amazed she was able to concentrate enough to even form that thought, considering how loudly her heart was pounding in her ears. Unable to find a chair without clutter, Hinata hesitantly took a seat on his bed and wouldn't be at all surprised if her entire body was beet red.

Even if they couldn't completely accept it, both knew that somehow this wasn't just friends spending time together. There was a taut rubber band pulled between the two and no matter how much they pulled on the opposite ends, they were unable to run away from this.

Naruto took his seat by her side and swallowed hard. He was being a complete idiot, unable to push away that funny feeling that was usually devoted to Sakura. Something was compelling him to act on it with Hinata and if he were the thinking type, he might have analyzed this. But he was Naruto. He acted on his feelings.

"Sorry," he murmured and Hinata looked at him inquisitively before his lips brushed against hers. After all these years, after all this time, Naruto finally showed her some form of affection. It felt different than Kiba, less desperate. There was confusion and surprise and realization in the kiss. After all, Naruto didn't understand at all how attraction worked and had no clue that the reason he had been watching Hinata from afar these last few years was exactly that reason.

He felt almost overwhelmed when Hinata responded to his kiss, her hands now gripping his arms gently. It was a strange and rather pleasant feeling to be kissing her, a different kind of nice from Sakura. It felt new and rather exhilarating that when he pushed her back against the mattress, she was looking at him and only him. She could see no one else but Naruto Uzumaki. It made him wonder just when Hinata had first truly "seen" him. With her tonight in this bed, he didn't feel like he was second to anything in her world. That in itself was somewhat humbling.

Now able to see her belly again, his hand ghosted over her puckered wound.

"Does it hurt?"

"Everything is fine," she replied with a gentle smile and softened eyes, something most people never saw from Hinata anymore. Tugging Naruto's shirt over his head, he grimaced slightly over his aggravated bruises. That fight with Sasuke earned him a fair amount of damage. He was fortunate to have the Nine Tails energy to speed up his healing.

"Are you okay?"

"It doesn't take me long to recover from anything."

Hinata gave a slight nod and signaled for Naruto to continue. Lips presses to lips, skin against skin, eyes seeing only the person before them. This felt a lot less like forgetting the pain and a lot more like learning something new. Impatience was starting to dominate every action, tossing cloth carelessly aside. Naruto tugged his buckle loose and froze, trying to force down the lump in his throat. He wasn't very knowledgeable when it came to this stuff but he was certain enough this was a big deal. This was something special but with Hinata stripped beneath him, her hands curled near her head, it was hard to pause and figure out just what was really happening. Naruto, after all, wasn't one for thinking.

It was the sort of awe that could almost be akin to a child's surprise upon seeing the beauty of their first full moon. Splendid and a little startling to discover just how small one was in the world. Maybe it was the distant moon, the smallness, that left people filled with a loneliness, why they had to fill each other. Finding his way inside, both stared back each other with the same wide-eyed amazement. Hinata moved beneath and around Naruto and he gave up remembering how to breathe.

* * *

Something jolted him from the haze of sleep. Staring at his ceiling, it took him a moment to collect his memories and remember why there was a warm body pressed flush against his this morning. With a drowsy smile, he smoothed Hinata's hair as she stirred and clung to him. But it was the precise and deliberate knocking that reminded him why he woke up in the first place. Slipping from the bed, he didn't bother searching for his shirt and stumbled towards the door. When the hell did people start visiting him all the time? He secretly wished it wouldn't be Sakura. She was a wound that would he would always wear proudly on his heart but he could never lie to himself. He was resigned to the fact that her heart was always Sasuke's. Perhaps that's why he was able to bring Hinata home last night. It was an old injury that only had the band-aid ripped off. It stung but he could survive this. Hinata always had been a fantastic healer.

"Yeah?" he opened the door to discover who his visitors were.

Sasuke?

No. It wasn't Sasuke. The man had Sharingan eyes but there was something harder and colder in his gaze, something that told Naruto this person was dangerous.

"So this is the Nine Tails child?" Itachi murmured.

Her instincts were screaming danger and she was immediately awake now, charging towards the open door with a kunai in hand.

"Naruto-kun!"

Silence and empty spaces were all that screamed in response.

All Hinata found of him was a pool of blood in the doorway.

To be continued…


	12. Ch 12: Unforgettable

**Wasted Years**

by Mizerable

Ch. 12: Unforgettable

This may have been a mistake.

Arriving home last night, or what she assumed was last night, her mind had been reeling. One might even say it was disturbed, unstable. But that being the case, she didn't think when she tore away the scarlet ribbon and unraveled the scroll. Time froze and raced and spun all about her and she probably couldn't recall even how to spell her name. All she could recognize was each character painted on the scroll being burned into her mind.

She knew she was a great deal more powerful than she had been, though waking up on her bedroom floor left her feeling less than splendid. Her body was stiff and aching, her mind disoriented. It took a great amount of effort to even begin collecting her thoughts as she tried to accept the truth of what she had brought upon herself. Meanwhile her hand came up to absently wipe away the drying blood from under her nose. Even though she now had a great deal of new chakra churning inside, it mostly was making her feel sick more than anything else. Perhaps that old gypsy woman had chosen the wrong scroll for her. If it was too powerful for the limits of her body to sustain…

The sudden knock at her door startled her from her thoughts. "Sakura? Your teacher is here," her mother said from the other side.

There was no time to think about this now. Hopefully Kakashi wouldn't notice her change. She wasn't ready to reveal it yet.

She wasn't ready to accept the consequences yet.

Sakura came down the stairs and Kakashi wasn't surprised to see her in such a disheveled state. Though something felt very off about her. There was a suffering that went beyond the usual with her. Granted he expected she would be broken up over yesterday, but there was a new burden that he just couldn't place.

And once again, he had bad news to give her. Though he got the feeling if he told her right at this moment, she would be absolutely devastated. It would be best to ease her into this mission, since she would have to see him again…Kakashi decided to at least be upfront about that.

"Sakura, a mission has come up…I know it will be difficult for you but it will require Sasuke's help. Will you be able to handle that?"

"It's a mission, right? Of course I can't turn away from it," her voice fell like dull metal against his ears.

So she was finally shutting off her emotions in order to perform as a shinobi…Kakashi never thought he would see the day when that happened. Though given the circumstances, it would be suicide if she didn't start now on this mission while with that person. Neither exchanged a word after that and traveled to Sasuke's old home in complete silence.

Just as Kakashi raised his hand to knock, he instead placed his hand on the door and slid it open. The door was unlocked? Both he and Sakura drew their kunai before entering. Room after room, they found nothing amiss but found no Sasuke either. Finally arriving at the bedroom, Kakashi carefully pushed it open.

"What the hell are you doing?" A somewhat drowsy response called out to him. Sasuke was still in bed? Kakashi seemed to recall he was always the one up by dawn and now he was still in bed well after sunrise?

"You left the door unlocked," Kakashi explained and entered the room, hazy light finding its way through the rice paper windows. Sasuke was on his back, propped up on his elbows and staring at his former teacher with mild irritation. He couldn't help but raise an eyebrow though when Sakura appeared in the doorway. He certainly didn't think she would have her act together enough to face him after yesterday. He supposed he shouldn't have been too surprised, since she took any opportunity she could to see him back then. It's not like she changed…

He couldn't exactly say that now. Something was very different about her in comparison to yesterday and he wasn't sure he liked it, either. She didn't look any different from yesterday. Soft features, slim body, all rather feminine. He could easily enough admit to himself that she was easy on the eyes, just as she had always been. Though no one but Yanagi could probably get that fact out of him. Still, something about Sakura was telling him she probably did something rather stupid after they met again.

Sasuke was staring at her rather intensely and it was making her feel rather uncomfortable. Why did he have to do this to her? Her cheeks were burning and maybe another time she would have been flattered. But she still wasn't feeling so great and Kakashi's silence was making her nervous. Why did he need both her and Sasuke for this mission?

"Sensei, you said there was a mission," Sakura stated, avoiding eye contact with Sasuke. The idea of fighting seemed much more appealing than catching Sasuke's eye, and some part of her recognized it was the result of the scroll. Not her heart.

"Yeah, there is one," Kakashi answered gravely, "And we need you for it as well, Sasuke."

Sasuke got out of bed now, making no argument over participating. Sakura couldn't help but let her eyes wander now. It was rude of her to do so, but she had rarely ever seen Sasuke with his shirt off back then—

"Oh my god…" she whispered, her hands covering her mouth to hide her shock. There was such a horrible scar in his side, about the size of a small fist with one long gnarled finger splayed out over his belly. What gave him such an awful wound!?

Sasuke picked up his shirt and realized both Sakura and Kakashi were staring at him. Hard.

"…What?"

"Where did you get that scar?" Kakashi asked coolly.

"Where did you get the scar on you face?" Sasuke countered. He knew his teacher wouldn't pursue it now. Kakashi never wanted to talk about where he got his Sharingan eye and the scar that came with having it implanted. He wasn't about to start talking now. It was none of their fucking business how Sasuke earned his injury anyway. Nobody ever likes talking about how they messed up and got wounded, unless they were Yanagi.

Which reminded him—

"Will she be needed as well?"

"Ah? No…Details are still sketchy and we haven't been able to confirm yet if the Akatsuki is even involved in this matter," Kakashi replied. Sasuke's eyes narrowed at this. Why was he needed then? He wasn't a Leaf shinobi any longer and was only here to fight the Akatsuki, not to take on other asinine missions.

"Why am I necessary then?" he inquired.

"Early this morning, without a sound…Somehow Naruto was abducted."

"What?" Sakura gasped. Naruto was…? But he's so powerful. Who could be strong enough to subdue him? And furthermore, why him?

"And you're sure of this?" Sasuke asked humorlessly. After fighting Naruto, it didn't seem possible that he would just be taken so easily. And there was no way that loud-mouthed idiot would go about anything quietly, especially getting kidnapped. God that sounded so ridiculous…

"There was…blood in his apartment," Kakashi explained, noting Sakura's pained expression.

_No! I swore I'd protect everyone! I wasn't going to let the people I care about be taken away from me anymore!!_

"So you want us to find him," Sasuke stated blandly, "In case you haven't noticed, I don't really have time to go looking for him."

"Oh, I guess I should clarify things a bit," Kakashi announced rather dryly, "You're just going to escort Sakura. She's the one who will look for him. After all, if you do get any trouble from people strong enough to take down Naruto, I'm sure they'll keep things interesting for you."

"Sensei—" Sakura felt a little insulted that Kakashi didn't think she could handle whatever it was on her own. If it was this kind of mission, shouldn't they just send out the Anbu anyway? This seemed incredibly stupid. But Kakashi waved her off. End of discussion.

Sasuke was about to voice his own protests but the steel of Kakashi's glare made him pause. "You aren't in any position to argue. If this is how the village wishes to use the Aohi in order to defend itself, you have no choice but to follow our orders." He scowled at that but chose not to fight it. If Kakashi wanted to force inane duties on him, including fighting someone apparently stronger than Naruto…

Perhaps this wouldn't be a complete waste of time.

Crouching down, Sasuke shook the lump of blankets rolled up on one side of the futon. "I'm leaving," he stated. Moments later, a rather disoriented Yanagi sat up and she stared rather dumbly at him.

"Wha…?" She rubbed her eyes with the back of her hand, slowly gaining consciousness.

"You sleep like the dead, Captain," he pointed out mildly, receiving a couple blinks in response, "And cover up."

Yanagi finally acknowledged that there were other people in the room through her grogginess. This was the nicest bed she'd ever slept in, inside the nicest room she'd ever slept in. Luckily those two visitors weren't trouble. Both she and Sasuke knew that if they had been a threat, Yanagi would have likely killed them at the front door. But since she slept through their arrival, they weren't strong enough to even show up on her radar. No worries, then. At least a couple people wouldn't be a bother here. Though that Sakura girl's face looked as if it were about to fall to pieces while watching her. It sort of made her wonder why.

"You got a problem, girl?" Yanagi asked, lighting up a drag. Hmm, that seemed to startle the poor little thing. It was just a simple question.

"N-no, ma'am," she replied quickly.

"Well, shit…You're callin' me 'ma'am', too? I dunno who's worse: you or Uchiha," Yanagi stated flatly before giving her arms a good stretch above her head. Now where did she leave her clothes…

Kakashi hadn't been very surprised by this. He knew something had to be going on between the two. But that wasn't what was standing out right now. He admittedly had been caught off-guard by Sasuke's horrible scar. He really hadn't expected the girl's body to be so badly damaged. Anyone who fought as a shinobi was bound to earn a few scars along the way, some even as bad as Sasuke's. But it was rare to ever see something as terrible as Yanagi's body. And now that Sakura's initial shock over Sasuke's relationship was wearing off, it seemed she, too, noticed the scars. If those weren't enough, being able to visibly see all the bones beneath her skin completed the image of a troubled woman.

"So where ya headed?" Yanagi asked, tugging her netting on.

"Naruto got kidnapped," Sasuke replied more gravely than he expected to.

"Naruto…That Hunter-nin kid? Damn, he's pretty strong though," Yanagi declared aloud, "Hell, he's gotta be if he survived fightin' a psycho like you."

"You always have a way with words," Sasuke mused, almost sincerely.

"What? It's true. Ain't everyday a guy's able ta crucify me, ya know," she answered, holding up her bandaged hands for emphasis. Sakura blanched at that. She didn't know Naruto had done something like that to another person. She didn't know Naruto was capable of doing something like that to another person.

"You let him," he retorted blandly.

"…Aa."

Sakura felt jealousy burning in the pit of her stomach while watching the two. They were just so casual with each other, so open. And from the look and sound of it, the Aohi captain was incredibly powerful. Would Sakura's new strength be enough to compete with a woman like that?

Who was she kidding? Nothing she did would matter now. Sasuke obviously had a deep relationship with this woman.

"How much time got before y'all gotta bail?"

"We don't really have any time to spare, for obvious reasons," Kakashi answered bluntly.

"Not even time for a drink?"

A drink? As in liquor?

"It's not even ten in the morning yet," Sakura grumbled. How the hell could anyone even think about drinking during the day like this, especially at a time like this?

Yanagi raised her flask to Sasuke. "For your nerves," she clarified. He rolled his eyes but didn't refuse the quick drink, surprising Kakashi and Sakura alike.

"I won't be able to keep an eye on you for a while, Captain. Try and keep the body count at a minimum for once," Sasuke reprimanded and hoisted his gear bag over his shoulder.

"You givin' me orders now, boy?" Yanagi drawled, sounding a bit suspicious.

"Wouldn't dream of it," he answered nonchalantly and headed for the door.

"If your hands start shakin', ya better just keep your cool."

Otherwise you won't be able to use your curse seal without killing yourself. I won't be able to watch over you today, either.

He gave a curt nod and was about to depart but Yanagi wasn't finished just yet.

"And Uchiha?" All eyes were on her now, huh? Well wasn't that just friggin' flattering… "We ain't got a lotta time. Don't screw around out there."

The three left silently afterwards and Yanagi flopped back down on the futon, her unbound hair fanning around her. She doubted those two Leaf shinobi noticed at all, but the tension between herself and Sasuke was almost sickening. He'd been so withdrawn since yesterday and she couldn't exactly blame him for it. No matter how much he let go of himself or how much stronger he became during their time together, he hadn't yet mended the wounds surrounding this place. She imagined it must be pretty damn hard for him and egging him on about it wasn't going to fix things. Last night only served to confirm the suspicions she held over the last three years.

* * *

After an extensive amount of silence that afternoon, Sasuke quietly insisted she be fed. They had a silent supper at a small restaurant that was actually willing to serve them, unlike most other places that refused to do so. Then he brought her to his former home, which no one had touched over the years. Maybe everyone feared that they, too, would succumb to the tragic curse of the Uchiha clan if they stayed in such a place. Regardless, Yanagi hadn't anticipated being brought to such a splendid place. She had never been to such a nice house before.

It was all well and good in spite of how somber he seemed. After being with him for so long, surely she could find away to keep his mind from such negative thoughts. Not being the type of woman that knew a thing about words, she could only take action. A few hard kisses seemed to do the trick at first. But the distance was growing and she could feel it more acutely now. Not sure what else to do, she let him have control. Whatever kept his head sane. Well, sane enough.

Sasuke's kisses became soft, almost timid, as he gently laid her down against the futon. Things were slow and mild, something they never bothered with before. It was pleasant, too pleasant in her opinion. They helped each other survive but they were not exactly kind to each other. But the only word she could find for last night was "tender." He'd been tender to her and it aggravated her a great deal after it was all over.

When they finished, he lied against her while she cradled his head against her chest. His breath was warm against her, his damp skin held a silver sheen beneath the creeping moonlight. Her fingers idly swept his hair aside while her mind mildly craved for liquor to dull the pain in her hands. In the silence, he tensed against her suddenly before recomposing himself and drifting into sleep. Yanagi didn't need to know what he was thinking and for once she didn't care to.

She would never know that three years ago, Sasuke had woken once in this very bed with another girl secured safely in his arms. It was a memory he repressed a great deal of time ago but after seeing her again, and then finding himself back in this old room in his old bed, she crept like summer breeze across his mind. Unexpected and quietly. He hadn't wanted to see her again.

He didn't want to remember.

He tried to forget her again tonight, just as he had tried three years ago. But it wasn't of any use. What he'd done was futile, if not a little foolish. He was pretty sure Yanagi realized it as well.

"Idiot."

Still staring at the beams of sunlight painted across the ceiling, Yanagi ran a hand through her hair in disgust. Even though she had the best night's sleep of her life, even though she woke up for the first time without the stabbing pain of hunger in her belly, something within was filled with a profound ache that she was certain no physical comfort could quell.

This had been a last time.

* * *

"That's pretty bold of you to say," Jiraiya was rather incredulous

"I hardly doubt my feelings on this matter are out of line," Hinata replied, "It makes no sense to send anyone but the Anbu on this mission."

"I have every intention of sending as many squads as necessary, though if Kakashi feels the extra help will be useful—"

"They will only hinder our work. Tell Kakashi to call them off. I, of all people, know that Sasuke Uchiha is not to be trusted with such a mission," Hinata declared, her voice cool and even.

Jiraiya knew Hinata wasn't the type of shinobi to hold a grudge. If she was getting a bad feeling about Sasuke, perhaps she was onto something. After all, he saw the shape the Sasuke and Naruto were in when they returned to Konoha. They had fought hard against one another, even willing to kill each other. Maybe…

"Are you sure you're up to the task? You are recovering from a pretty bad injury."

"I can function perfectly well in my task. Furthermore, as I was the one who discovered his disappearance, I feel it would be best if I saw this mission through to the end."

Hinata wasn't about to admit to anyone that she only knew because she and Naruto got drunk, had a fling, and that she had been unable to wake up in time to save him because of a strong genjutsu used against her. She also didn't want to add that she knew Sasuke could likely rise to the occasion and help save Naruto. But it would be worse than killing Naruto by having his pride so badly injured through needing Sasuke to help him.

Furthermore, the pain between Naruto and Sakura needed time to fade. There would be tremendous hurt and guilt on both sides if they met under such circumstances. Also, Naruto being as honest as he is, might blurt out what happened last night. Hinata herself needed to sort things out still. The last thing anyone needed was for this tangled web to be filled with even more pain.

With a sigh, Jiraiya realized he wasn't going to win an argument with a hardened Anbu soldier like Hinata Hyuga.

"Fine, you're on the job. Though if that Uchiha punk became anything like his captain, telling him 'no' probably won't keep him from doing a damn thing."

"Probably not," she remarked dryly, "Thank you, sir."

With that, Hinata was gone from his office and off to find Naruto.

Jiraiya almost felt sorry for whoever took the kid.

Almost.

* * *

Water dove down the wall before hitting the floor over and over again with a resounding splash. It was a miracle he could focus enough to notice it though. Though if there were ever such a thing as mercy, he would be fortunate enough to pass out and wake up in a warm bed when this was all over. Another spasm of shivers ravaged his body, making the metal that bound his wrists behind the chair bite into his sensitive flesh again. His eyes started to drift shut and he gladly embraced the sleep before something hard caught him across the temple, snapping him back into delayed alertness. Only now did any warmth present itself as it raced sticky down the side of his face before splattering against his bare chest.

"Regrettably, I need for you to stay awake." It was a cold voice that commanded him. Naruto decided he didn't like that voice.

"For…what?" Naruto choked out.

"There is something inside you that is very precious. I need you to give it to me."

"You don't have…a very nice way of asking…"

With that statement, something burned strongly against his stomach. Against his seal. He bit his lip with a substantial amount of blood now dripping down his chin just to keep himself from crying out. It felt as if something were being ripped out of him, as if everything inside him was floating up to just beneath the skin and was about to boil over. Everything inside felt scalding hot and he just wanted this over with. He didn't know how much longer he could keep the damn fox at bay if things continued like this.

His head was suddenly yanked back by the hair, forcing him to only look up. In the pitch- blackness, it was hard not to focus on the crimson glowing in the dark. He couldn't avoid the Tsukiyomi Sharingan.

"For the next 48 hours, you will experience all the loneliness and rejection this village heaped upon you."

_Monster!_

_It's your fault so many died!_

_He has no family. It's no wonder he's such a freak._

_Go away!_

_You're so annoying…_

_Who would ever acknowledge you!_

All the pain he'd known in life was inflicted all at once, that horrid feeling then dragged out over two days. Two days that in reality was less than two minutes.

Naruto couldn't hold back his cries this time.

* * *

"I've gotta have the worst luck in the world," Shikamaru muttered as he adjusted the fasteners on his vest. First he gets sent on an insane mission, then he has to trek all the way back here to fight a terrorist group, and now he was getting sent out to find that idiot Naruto. "This is such a pain in the ass."

"You better come right back after you find him. Otherwise I'll be hunting you."

She didn't sound too happy, not that he could blame her. Staring into the mirror, he was obviously watching her reflection instead of his while she got dressed. There were no words when he came back, not that it would have mattered. Ino wasn't the type of girl to ever take "no" for an answer.

Not that he would have ever said no.

Deep down inside, Shikamaru knew she wasn't really angry. But she was never any good at showing her worries. So she covered it up with irritation. If he called her on it though, then she really would get pissed. Ah, the irony…

"I'm gonna come back, you know," he stated, turning to face her.

"Of course you are!" she answered in her typical haughty fashion, crossing her arms over her chest for added effect.

"Wanna walk with me to headquarters?" Obviously she was going to say yes. Hell, she would have probably invited herself anyway. Though it still sent shivers up his spine when she took his hand, her features softening.

* * *

This was awkward.

What was Kakashi thinking? Putting the two of them together like this…

He barely gave them any information before he took off to handle his own work and so far, they hadn't turned up much about anything. Though as soon as most people saw Sasuke, they refused to be of any help at all. On top of it all, Sasuke had barely spoken a word anyway. Now standing on the bridge where Team Seven would meet everyday all those years ago, Sakura fought hard to ignore the stab of nostalgia. But she really couldn't take this anymore. Even if it hurt, she had to end this bitter silence.

"What is Captain Yanagi like?" her voice came out a little softer than she intended, "Is she a nice person?"

"Hardly," Sasuke answered dryly as he fished through his pockets for his cigarettes, ignoring her startled reaction. Why the hell did Sakura have to try and spark a conversation? About Yanagi, no less…

"She didn't seem so terrible," Sakura's voice was small.

"She's a murderer. A gruesome one, at that," Sasuke replied and took a generous drag.

"Why do you stay with her then?"

"She's not a nice woman. I never said she was a bad one."

"Do you love her?"

She hadn't meant to blurt out such a personal question. That was horribly rude of her. She couldn't say she knew Sasuke anymore, especially after seeing him so comfortable with that woman today. She had no right to ask him.

"I'm sorry," she added hastily, "It's none of my business."

Sasuke silently observed her, letting the tobacco burn his throat. Now that she accepted the reality of his return, he could notice while her feelings were evidently still quite strong for him, she had become rather subdued as a person. Back in their younger days, he imagined she would have immediately seen Yanagi as a rival and would probably try to bicker with her just as she had with Ino. Her maturity and his absence left her personality rather bittersweet it seemed.

As he pondered her question, his mind was drawn to last night with Yanagi. Beneath the filtered moonlight, he watched her beneath him. Sometimes she could really be quite appealing. To look at. It was a slow, quite evening with slow, quiet sex with Yanagi; the sort of things they wrote about in idiotic books. They were things Yanagi could never read about. Even in a place that was so familiar, even with the woman he trusted so dearly…

"No…I don't think I'm even capable of such feelings."

"Eh?"

Sakura hadn't expected an answer, least of all one so honest.

"Does—does she know?"

Sasuke could feel the smallest of smiles itching to form. Sakura should have been happy to know he wasn't in love with that woman, yet she was suddenly concerned for that very woman's own heart. Presuming Yanagi hadn't killed that, as well.

Sakura really was too sweet for her own damn good sometimes…

"There's no delusions between us. It's just sex," he replied, taking note in Sakura's dissatisfaction with his somewhat crass answer, "She's hasn't had the easiest of times. You could say she's a bit of a comfort creature these days."

It seemed like Yanagi led a rather excruciating life. Judging from those wounds, she obviously did. It was sad to know people had to suffer so greatly, and most likely, alone most of the time. A woman like that probably needed Sasuke more than she did, whether they loved each other or not.

"You must have learned a lot from her, about the world…"

"Yeah," Sasuke answered, stubbing out his cigarette against the grain of the bridge. Sakura could tell he obviously didn't want to talk about her anymore. They should probably get going, even though they had absolutely no clue yet as to where Naruto might be. It was gnawing at her, adding to an anxiety she tried to hide with stupid questions.

Sakura was a nervous, flighty girl it seemed. God knows what she was thinking happened to Naruto. Though knowing that idiot, he was probably just fine even if he got roughed up a bit. Though now that she was upset again, he couldn't see any but it felt as if she were emitting some sort of bizarre and powerful chakra. What did that stupid girl end up doing yesterday?

"I'm not sure what you did to yourself but you better be able to handle it."

"What makes you think I did anything?" she had to play it cool. She didn't want him being suspicious.

How could Sasuke know?

What could he see that was so different about her?

"I could never forget the way you feel."

Sakura's face flushed and she had no words for him. There were no words to describe what she felt at this moment, the way her heart was swelling.

"Sasuke-kun," she whispered. With everything going on inside because of him, coupled with the effects of the scroll, it felt as if she might faint at any time.

Why did he have to leave again?

"When this is all over, why can't you stay?"

He shouldn't have kept talking to her. It was just making things more complicated. She wouldn't understand why he had to leave with Yanagi again, anyway.

"I owe Yanagi a great deal," came his reply, "For all the trouble I caused her, I can't just abandon her now."

"Did she save your life?"

Sasuke nodded as the memory of waking up on that stiff mattress while she bound his wound cycled through his mind.

"She taught me to control the curse," Sakura's face brightened when she heard that. She had always been dreadfully afraid of the curse seal. But considering what it made him do to her back then…

"Because of her, I was able to survive so that I may exact my revenge against that man."

"Itachi," she murmured with a shudder. With Sasuke's return, it was hard not to recall the times surrounding his departure three years ago.

Sasuke blanched now. Sakura knew. After what happened to her back then…She probably knew everything about his past now and he wasn't happy about that at all.

"Is he the one…Is he the one that gave you that scar?" her hand trembled as she reached towards his side.

"…Aa."

"I'm sorry," she whispered while she rested her hand over fabric and wound, "If I'd been strong enough back then, I could have helped you defeat--"

_Not that you ever would have accepted my help._

"It wouldn't have made a difference. The gap between myself and him…" He knew the truth but it was a lot harder to admit his weaknesses to her than to Yanagi, "I wasn't able to win then. If Yanagi hadn't shown up when she had, I would have died. Because she was strong enough to fight him then, she made me strong enough to face him now."

"Yanagi-san is that powerful?" Sakura asked in amazement. How could Sasuke not love a woman who could defend herself against someone like Itachi?

"She's just stubborn," Sasuke mumbled, his hand now resting on top of Sakura's. He stared off into the distance for a long while, apparently lost in thought, still pressing Sakura's hand against his body.

"Sasuke-kun?"

"We should get going."

* * *

"Do we have confirmation?"

"That's an affirmative."

"Roger. Prepare to infiltrate," Hinata tugged her mask down as she and her fellow Anbu circled the long since abandoned building carefully hidden among the trees.

To be continued…


	13. Ch 13: We've All Our Demons

**Wasted Years**

by Mizerable

Ch.13: We've All Our Demons

The rank smell of bile and blood bit into her senses more overwhelmingly with every step. This building was a goddamn slaughterhouse. She could only pray they weren't too late. But surely Naruto had to be okay. If anyone could endure this, it would be him. Though the entire situation surrounding his disappearance seemed so irrational. Why only Naruto? Was this just an Akatsuki plan to pull the Anbu away? That thought was what surely kept Jiraiya from sending more help. But if it wasn't that terrorist group and yet were still strong enough to disarm Naruto, the Akatsuki might be of little consequence by now.

Could it be Orochimaru?

Hinata was getting a terrible feeling about this. It was time to just find Naruto and get out. She would definitely save him now to make up for being unable to protect him earlier. Hopefully she could get through this unnoticed.

"Byakugan."

She could see through the infested wood; through the dust and debris and the decrepit. Above and a little off to the left was a figure bound to a chair. The light of the room was too dim for even her eyes to make out everything but the person was injured.

_Hang in there, Naruto-kun. I'm coming._

Signaling to her fellow squad member, they proceeded with caution in the direction of the room. The sporadic creak of the floor boards above were filling her with the anxiety that they were by no means alone. Things were going to get rough from here. A horrid shriek that didn't even hold a completely human quality ripped through the building and caution was thrown to the wind. Naruto was in grave danger and they didn't have time to play it safe. They would not fail the mission.

She would not fail him.

Making it to the room seemed far too simple. There were no guards and no opposition. This had set-up written all over it, but they were Anbu. They could handle whatever was waiting. Her failure against Sasuke would not affect today's mission. Hinata entered the room while two other team members flanked the door. It appeared the pitch room was empty aside from its prisoner. It wasn't a genjutsu this time, either. This was the real Naruto and even the darkness could not hide the heady scent of blood richly saturating the air.

"Naruto-kun," Hinata spoke in a whisper just in case someone managed to escape her eyes in the dark. He was visibly shaking, his breath coming out in harsh gasps.

"Get…out…"

She blinked beneath her mask in surprise. He must have been worried that she, too, would be caught. Or maybe he was even being foolish and wanted to be able to escape without depending on another person. "Don't worry. I'm here with the Anbu. We'll take it from here." She began cracking open the lock of his handcuffs, suspicious that no one was here with the captive. Moreover, the terrible chakra that this building was drenched in only seemed to grow more powerful with every second.

Naruto was muttering protests but Hinata finally wrenched the bindings open. They had best get Naruto to a doctor now. The state of shock he reached from the beating he took must have given him a fever. His skin was burning to the touch. "You're free now, Naruto-kun—"

"Get away from me!!"

Hinata jumped as his voice reverberated through the empty spaces. He was hunched over in his seat, his arms hugging his quivering form. Her hand gingerly reached out and rested between his shoulder blades. She barely had time to hear his snarl before he whipped around and sent the chair toppling over, his hand clamped firmly around her throat.

Immediately, the two other Anbu members charged in with weapons drawn. It must have been a trick, after all. It couldn't be the real Naruto. He would never--With a sweep of his arm, Naruto's chakra sent them both into the darkness with sickening crunches as they hit the wall somewhere across the room. Hinata ripped her mask off, her lungs burning for air and her spine begging for the pressure to be released. In the swirling blackness, she found copper eyes staring back at her filled with an immeasurable amount of contempt and hatred.

"N-Naru—to-kun," she gasped. It was getting harder and harder to ponder what they had done to him as it became harder and harder to breathe. Even as she struggled to press the chakra points in his arm, there was no change. This was it. There was no one to stop her killer this time. She still lacked the power to win on her own. She was still weak.

Suddenly, she was roughly thrown aside and bounced over the rot and broken glass. Naruto was gone before she rolled to a stop, leaving her coughing, confused, and feeling betrayed in a room soaked in the smell of his blood.

* * *

It sounded like things were getting pretty bad upstairs. It looks like he would have to fight after all. What a pain in the ass…

This place was pretty dark. Without a sliver of light, it would be hard to pull off his attacks in surroundings like this. The odds weren't looking too good. A pained gasp to his right followed by a thump left the hairs on the back of his neck standing. Someone was moving around so closely and they couldn't even sense another person there. Though it was hard to sense much of anything with that strange chakra permeating through everything.

A groan from the wood signaled the movement but when he saw his opponent's eyes, he couldn't move. He couldn't defend the sword as it pierced through belly to back. He hit the floor with his eyes still fixated on the crimson eyes coolly regarding him.

_Sasuke…!?_

He couldn't get out any questions for his attacker as his body snapped with spasms on the ground. How was it possible? Sasuke died three years ago. Even if he were somehow alive, why would he attack?

Itachi could sense the recognition. This Anbu soldier wasn't all that old. Perhaps this one, too, knew of his younger brother. Perhaps here in the dark, this boy questioned how a dead ninja could attack him.

He hadn't been ignorant of the rumors over the years, though. Talks of a boy with dark hair and Sharingan eyes now traveling with Captain Yanagi of the Aohi reached his ears some time ago. She was just the type to take in that child, too. If the rumors were true, it would be interesting to see what she was capable of transforming him into.

Perhaps his brother would become all he dreamed him to be. And perhaps, she too…

Shikamaru couldn't call after the retreating form as it slipped away into the black again. He couldn't help but realize rather bitterly how angry Ino was going to be now that he couldn't keep his promise. He couldn't come home to her again. He couldn't return to her bed again.

No regrets, huh…

* * *

"Sensei, there's a weird lady staring through the window," Konohamaru announced, which quickly earned murmurs questioning if she was an Akatsuki spy. She was so unobtrusive, even Iruka hadn't sensed her until she was right before the glass. Perhaps they should have kept the Academy closed after all, until matter passed. It had been hard enough for him to get through the lessons with his mind worrying endlessly over Naruto on top of everything else. But his class was set to graduate soon. They couldn't call off school when they were about to earn a new set of shinobi to help protect the village.

"Stay calm, kids. I'll take care of this," Iruka announced. If this were an Akatsuki assassin, even his chuunin level skill would probably not be enough. He opened the window to call out to her regardless. He could hope his voice would signal other shinobi in the nearby vicinity.

"Identify yourself and state what business you have in this village."

Yanagi, of course, was never very good at doing what anyone said and walked up to the window before perching herself on the sill. Iruka immediately drew his shuriken but Yanagi took firm hold of his arm to keep him from attacking. She already had enough scars, after all.

"That ain't a real nice way a greetin' somebody," she pointed out with mild irritation.

"Sensei!" Moegi cried out. This lady was stronger than the teacher? They were in big trouble now.

"Wha? This a school or somethin'?"

"Yes, it's a school!" Konohamaru shouted, trying to hide his fear, "Didn't you see the sign outside?" Yanagi shrugged and released Iruka before coolly sauntering past him.

"I ain't never been ta one before," she stated, pulling out her trusty cigarettes, "It don't matter if I saw any signs. Can't read 'em, anyway."

She relished the tobacco as it burned strong in her throat. It was a simple pleasure she allowed herself, one of the only things she kept by her side tried and true over the years. It was a feeling that never changed, so much like herself.

So much unlike him.

"Are you gonna kill us?"

She blinked in lingering surprise after the voice of a frightened kid reached her ears.

"Shit, ain't your village leaders good for nothin'? Ain't y'all been told they hired me?"

"Yanagi," Iruka realized, "You're Captain Yanagi."

Well, at least the man in charge heard about her. That was slightly more gratifying to know.

"Sensei? You know who she is?" The class was now buzzing with questions.

"Uh…Yes, she's the leader of the Aohi, a strong group of ninja who are going to help defend the village from the Akatsuki."

From the sound of it, this teacher didn't know much outside of that. Though Yanagi was sure he heard of her reputation. The poor bastard probably thought she planned on gutting every last one of his students despite her "protection" orders. Well, she did threaten to burn down the village earlier, didn't she…This whole ordeal was starting to annoy her more and more.

Iruka was, in fact, terrified. Putting aside how easily she countered his attack minutes ago, he had heard the stories about the Aohi. Before this group made a name for itself, its captain was infamous for committing absolutely heinous murders. Always to survive, was what she told a shinobi who managed to escape her blade. She killed in unimaginable ways for the sake of her own survival.

"Hey Teacher," Yanagi called, "You ever have a kid named Uchiha for a student?"

_Uchiha?_

"You mean Sasuke-niichan?" Konohamaru piped up, eyes bright and shiny. Someone from far away remembered a Konoha hero! Yanagi gave a vague nod. She came to this place not really sure what she was looking for, maybe question a couple of kids if they had seen anything weird going on lately. A bunch of brats like these kids might have seen an Akatsuki soldier and not even realized it. But somehow this was turning less into work and more of something else.

"Yes, he was one of my students. He graduated at the top of his class, even," Iruka answered cautiously, "Though I must admit I find it strange that you asked. I'm afraid Sasuke Uchiha died three years ago."

What was she getting at? Perhaps she was only curious, as it was Sasuke's elder brother that was an important member of the Akatsuki. She likely just wanted as best of an understanding of the situation as she could gain.

"He ain't dead, you know," Yanagi took a seat on the corner of a desk, "Little Uchiha."

Even if that memorial stone said otherwise.

Judging from the sheer surprise on the teacher's face, as well as the students, everyone must have been kept in the dark on this matter. One could suppose it was for the best. Sasuke never received attention very warmly. It was likely a wise decision to keep his return out of the spotlight. Though she supposed they somewhat should be warned just to avoid another round of startled reactions, should they see him. But if she had anything to do with it, they would be leaving soon enough so that none of these people would get a chance to bother the kid.

"But how?" Iruka asked, rather incredulous to the news. He didn't need to ask aloud why the boy never returned for her to hear it.

"You could say he's in my care these days," Yanagi replied plainly.

Funny, wording it that way almost made her feel responsible for him somehow. She couldn't recall ever describing such a sentiment in regards to her other soldiers. Everyone would take care of their own person and just concentrate on surviving through the hell of continual war and poverty. You kept an eye on your traveling partner, as their help kept you that much further from your own execution, but you couldn't quite ever say there was an affinity on a personal level. They were all mercenaries, being paid with the freedom of life, and this was business. It had nothing to do with feelings. She didn't even have those.

Though somehow he became her charge, of sorts. Yanagi took care of him over these years--trained and scrounged with him. Even became a bizarre sort of teacher to him. Though that's how everything started, didn't it? She had looked after him.

* * *

It was a bold move on her part to enter a clearing, especially in such a miserable state. But through her crimson haze, the stream's voice still reached her ears. The fight held a scrap of success, considering he'd fainted. It would have been a little easier to sleep if he were dead but that time would come soon enough. There was no pain that could be inflicted upon her that whiskey could not fix and there was no person in this world that she could not outlive. Next chance, she would remember to take out his traveling companion first. Itachi would fall easily enough to her once all other obstacles were cleared from her path.

The blood gripped sticky, weighing down her clothing against her skin. The water would likely alleviate some of her discomfort. Afterwards, she was to meet with some of her fellow troops and head in the direction of Cloud Country. It was a gray place, an unchanging place and it felt more welcoming than this one. She was only a few days away from a Hidden Village and that would not bode well for her. She was in no mood to slaughter whatever assassins from there that might pick up her trail.

Though this sun was a tad more forgiving this time of year than all the rain of that place.

Shuffling towards the riverbed, something off to the side caught her attention. Gleaming white under the sun and stinking of death, her curiosity tugged her towards the prone form. What made such high level Akatsuki bother killing this one? They usually didn't waste their time if it was someone unimportant. Especially since they must have known she was nearby--today was far from the first time she and Itachi danced together. He should have felt her deep in his bones, and yet...

Whatever the reason, she could only wonder if perhaps this corpse had once been one of her own while still alive. Though a less likely possibility from Itachi, Kisame was likely to cut down any Aohi member he spotted as if this were a deranged gang war. She doubted he saw the situation as it really was: survival of the fittest.

And she **always** survived.

She imagined surprise must have had the rare misfortune of showing upon her features when her eyes fell upon the pitiful looking creature. The terrible splash of crimson across his belly robbed the rest of his form of all its color--a monochrome and empty shape. He'd bled out from an expansive puncture in his side and it now clung velvet and cooling from the bowing blades. The arm that wasn't bent so awkwardly still had its fingers grasped tightly around the grass even in death. This boy had lied here suffering tremendously before his body finally quit.

Dark strands curtained colorless features, almost urging her to brush them aside to see this child's face. There were no traces of pain there, no trauma from injuries save for the red that had spilled over his lips. It was a gruesome death and while it certainly wasn't the first or even the worst she'd ever seen, it somehow felt unjustified. How did killing this boy grant the Akatsuki any gain? He certainly couldn't have been a threat to them. If he had been, he would have likely had even more injuries than he did now.

Idly wiping away the blood from his chin, she felt it. Almost confusing it with the wind, she was certain she felt his breath against her fingers. This kid was alive?? Pressing her ear flush against his chest the weakest and most erratic of heartbeats rattled beneath the bones. Somehow this boy was still clinging desperately to his life. Perhaps there was something more to this battle, something she didn't comprehend. Revenge. Anger. Despair. They weren't things she could grasp so easily. They weren't sensations the sting of a blade or the chill of raindrops could translate for her mind.

This child was important somehow. If she could get information about Itachi and Kisame from this kid, he would be a wonderfully useful find. She would only need him to live long enough to unravel the mystery. If he proved to be a problem, she could just as easily finish the job the Akatsuki started.

When he finally woke, she found an embittered man waiting behind those closed eyes. In some ways, he was hardly the child she always called him. But he was a pampered boy so far as material comforts went and it had been fun for a time watching him rather indignantly learn to do without. To live on her level.

Somehow, it became a little disgraceful to view after a while.

The boy held a terrible passion within his eyes, an urge to hurt the one he fully believed put him in this very situation. Sometimes he saw that person as being his brother, other moments it was her for all the hell she put him through. Even after swearing he would give his trust, he lashed out at her. Hated her. Gradually, just as all things did at some point, that too slipped away from him. All his passions and furies bled away and left behind…Nothing. There was nothing left but an emptiness that she had no words for. Yanagi was never very good with words.

He wasn't accustomed to hiding the right things emotionally to the point that even she could see them, almost as if he wanted his secrets to be discovered. So she played on that. She tried physical things. She understood physical things. Anything to make him react, anything to make him move past it and forget. He'd be of no use to her if he couldn't function to the best of his abilities. She needed a soldier that could wake up in the morning and face it without a thought about the night before and all of its previous nights.

Somewhere along the way, it all changed. Just as he had.

It was autumn, if she remembered correctly. He was sick again and her body had more aches than she'd ever admit so they stopped at a desolate inn for shelter. After leaving him in order to replenish the cigarette stash, she returned to find him sitting on the floor with his head tilted against the window glass. His eyes were glancing outside but likely didn't see a thing that was out there. He probably hadn't even heard her come inside and if she'd been in a more enthused mood, she might have yelled about his inattention.

He'd left his features exposed and she could drink of his thousand regrets. Things he should have done, things he shouldn't have. All his wishes and failures in vivid colors, as he dreamt of a life where he didn't do everything wrong for the sake of that second chance.

His eyes drifted shut as he let all the darker elements eat away at his mind but she could only stand by and watch. She didn't understand what regret meant, having never done anything she felt required such. Her life was filled with too much chaos to stop and think about all she'd done with her time in this place.

Somehow she wondered if her lack of words was what left him enough silence to hear the agony in his head. Though she never could find her voice.

* * *

Things had been much simpler in the beginning.

Somehow breaking down his walls and stripping away everything he was left things all the more complex. The truth of the matter was perhaps those walls weren't meant to be taken. The truth was he was young man with nothing left to give when she found him. His family, his home, his ambitions. Everything he had was taken or thrown away by the time she met him. The barriers he'd built kept him a little more human. She wasn't an educated woman but she somehow figured out later that, physical endurance aside, he was not a man that could survive without his precious defenses. Those walls were armor that she robbed him of. Perhaps in that regard she did in fact earn every bit of his scorn.

Though of all the people he hated, he despised himself the most.

There was a whole room of people staring at her now and she inwardly cursed for getting lost in thought here. Thus, proving nothing good ever did come of thinking. She also got the feeling that no one here was bound to be particularly helpful.

"Well, guess I'll be leavin' now," she decided and got back on her feet.

"Where are you gonna go now?" some kid asked her, watching her every movement with impossibly large eyes.

"I need ta look after someone."

* * *

The energy was suffocating. Sasuke was getting the feeling that Kakashi hadn't sent him so much as an escort but most likely wanted him to conduct the damn mission in place of Sakura. However strong she might have become, there was no way she could handle whatever was radiating such a powerful chakra.

"It feels like…" Sakura didn't finish her statement. She didn't have to. They both knew it felt similar in a lot of ways to Naruto, but there was a malignance spun within it that Naruto simply didn't possess. Furthermore, he was powerful but there was no way he could have been hiding this level of chakra. Either way, having Sakura with him would only slow him down. After going through all the shit he witnessed over the last three years, he was confident he could hold his own against whatever was waiting. He doubted she could say the same.

"You son of a bitch."

Both froze upon hearing the voice. The heavy energy soaked through everything and made it all the more difficult to pinpoint anyone's location. Damn it, where the hell were the Anbu?

"I thought I told you to stay away from Sakura-chan."

"Naruto?" Sakura called into the dark. Naruto was the only person that called her "Sakura-chan" but that voice certainly didn't sound like him. It was something a little more primitive, a little more feral. Creeping into the faint light, copper eyes gazed back at them with bone white fangs snarling in accompaniment. His body held a predatory stance, crouched with claws poised as he readied to strike at any given moment. Though more than anything, in the poor lighting all eyes were drawn to the glowing mark on Naruto's stomach. Neither knew the Nine Tails was sealed within him; a burden he carried alone for all these years. More importantly, neither knew its seal was rapidly unraveling.

"What did they do to him?" Sakura whispered. Sasuke shook his head slightly, too focused on Naruto's desire to kill. This went beyond all the anger and hate he sensed when he and Naruto last fought. This was another breed of bloodlust.

"Sakura, leave," Sasuke ordered flatly. This was going to get ugly and she would just get in the way. Especially since Naruto would probably try to kill both of them if given the chance. What had these people done to him anyway?

"What?" Sakura couldn't believe it. They found Naruto and obviously something was wrong with him. He needed their help. There was no way she was leaving him behind in such a state. "I'm not going."

He should have figured she would be this damn stupid. She thought she could "save" Naruto, just as she thought she could save him. And that certainly turned out wonderfully. He was a goddamn murderer no matter how long or hard she tried to prevent that.

Then there was Naruto. All that power he kept locked inside all these years must have been pouring out right here and now. It was a dark power, lethal and it was going to tear them apart. He should have known.

"Naruto," he mumbled, "You always were a complete idiot."

The familiar burning sensation blossomed at his neck and wound over his skin, earning a horrified look from Sakura.

"But—But—" she stumbled, "You said Yanagi-san helped you control it!"

"Don't worry. I'm in control."

"Why are you using the curse seal though!? It's Naruto—"

"—Who is about to kill us both. Just shut up and stay out of this," he growled. He couldn't think about how upset she looked right now. She was a tough enough girl. She'd deal well enough, whatever the outcome.

Naruto was far less patient with his prey and launched the first wave. But if he wanted to spill some blood, Sasuke had no qualms with doing the same. After all, they never did get to finish their fight. Whatever had been unleashed in Naruto gave him speed that even the Sharingan had difficulty following. But if he couldn't dodge it, the curse seal could take the brunt of anything. More importantly, his body was beyond the pain. That completely earned Yanagi's thanks.

Yanagi, who never felt the pain.

Yanagi, who wasn't here today.

Instead, there stood the girl who had been by his side no matter how deeply the pain was driven into her bleeding heart. She knew his ugliness and though she couldn't protect herself from it the way Yanagi could, she always gave him the softest of smiles. No matter how badly he abused her. To be frank, he was quite a bit pleased that she slapped him when they met again. Maybe she, too, could overcome the pain and then stop caring so damn much for him. Please let her heart be hardened. He couldn't watch over her like he had when they had all once been teammates a lifetime ago.

Naruto hadn't always been like this, had he…He wasn't an educated boy. He had been the laughingstock of the Academy and even after his skills became more refined, he was still a dense and silly little idiot who needed to have information beaten into his head for him to get it. Always smiling, though. Even when he was hurting. He would never be a graceful fighter or the smartest man, but he always gave everything he had. It was funny to think about how similar he was to Yanagi in some ways.

He had made for a good rival, as far as rivalries went. At the time, it pissed him off to see this moron surpass him. But for a time, it drove him to become stronger. At least, until he began hating Naruto a lot less and hated himself a lot more. At that point, Naruto was only an object in his path. A measuring stick of sorts to test how much stronger he needed to—

_They were just a measuring stick to test myself._

_You killed everyone for that…?_

His body jerked at the recollection. Ten years had passed since the Uchiha clan had been wiped out and he hadn't managed to change anything. He hadn't avenged anyone. He only became a little more similar to the man who stole his world. Yanagi warned him of this change, didn't she? She stopped him from killing Hinata for solely that reason. The more he fought against it, the closer he found himself walking in his brother's footsteps. He became a murderer and was prepared to take the life of someone he once saved. Amidst the ice and fog, he hadn't wanted Naruto to die that time…

A fist cracked hard against his jaw and sent his body skidding across the wood and further into the blackness.

"Sasuke-kun!" Sakura's voice cracked and trailed of into a bitten scream as she clutched her head. Something tremendous was churning inside of her and it felt as if she might explode if she didn't release it. Her trembling hands moved against her will, drawn to one another by the magnetism of desperation. More than anything, she never dreamed she would unleash the power of the scroll against Naruto. It was he, more than anyone, that she wished to have been her dearest. Wonderful, devoted Naruto whom she hurt over and over again. She prayed that someday, maybe even a little, his heart could forgive her pitiful treatment of him.

"I'm sorry."

* * *

"That should be everything," Jiraiya stated as he placed the last scroll in his bag before hoisting it over his shoulder.

"You better get a move on it. It doesn't feel like things are going too well there."

No, it certainly didn't seem that way at all. Perhaps it had been a mistake to listen to that brat Kakashi after all. It seemed those three kids were oil and water. Things just felt like they were getting worse and worse when that team mixed together.

"I'm counting on you to take care of things here without me," Jiraiya stated casually.

"Not a problem!" Tsunade answered with a self-satisfied grin, "There was no way I'd miss out when the stakes are this high."

* * *

She couldn't even leave the kid alone for a couple of hours without her having to come to the rescue. This whole place screamed deathtrap. She couldn't sense chakra, per say, but she knew what danger felt like and she recognized the scent of blood more so than her favorite brand of smoke. Every now and then, she would come across a corpse of some poor Anbu who had met an unfortunate end. If it wasn't the Akatsuki, whoever it turned out to be would at least be a little bit interesting.

She paused for a moment. There was a wheezing and troubled breath coming from nearby while trying not to get caught. After all, they'd have no idea if she were friend or foe. From the sound of it, even the best of shinobi wouldn't be able to hide it. Must be a dying man. Without much trouble, she found the wounded soldier crumpled on the floor.

She crouched down and pulled out her matchbook, striking one to get a good look at this one's status. His mask had already been pulled away and he stared back at her with bleary eyes. Through his tummy was the puncture while the puddle he was lying in indicated he was skewered straight through. "Boy, you got enough breath to tell me who did this?"

"Sharingan—He had Sharingan eyes," Shikamaru choked out, "Only guy I…knew who had those…died a while ago."

Yanagi waved out the match after it burned her fingertips. Sharingan, huh? Well, she figured this battle would be interesting…

"It ain't Sasuke who stabbed ya," Yanagi stated coolly as she took hold of the kid's trembling hand, "If he decided to kill you, he wouldn't 'a let you survive long enough ta suffer."

Another man, however, wouldn't care if he left you in agony. Wouldn't even care if you died, so long as you never got in his way again. She couldn't think of anyone else who that might have sounded like…

Yanagi pulled off her shirt, left now only with the netting, and rendered it into strips. "You got somethin' ta hang in there for, kid?"

"There…there's a girl back home—" he got out between his coughs, "She'd be pissed…if I didn't come back."

So some Konoha shinobi actually return to their women? How refreshing to hear.

"Heh, you're pretty smart, kid," Yanagi wrapped and bound the cloth around the wound, "Your lady better take good care of you."

The wound was pretty bad so it was hard to say whether or not he'd pull through. But so long as he had that drive, she could tell him he had a chance. She was meant to protect this village now. All their lives would be on her head. Even this boy and his simple wish were her responsibility now. Just what she needed…more responsibility.

Sword unsheathed, she walked away from the boy with a cigarette dangling from her mouth. With the smallest of smirks, she idly realized things wouldn't go quite according to plan after all.

"It's been a while, Captain."

"Have you missed me, Itachi?"

* * *

Violent and blistering waves of the purest energy, angry and red, rippled out of control. Even Naruto was shoved backwards as Sasuke shielded himself against the torrent of debris and heat. A portion of the wall gave way in a sizable chunk, letting light stream through in blinding white. Grateful to have the time to let his eyes adjust, they immediately located the source of the new and overwhelming chakra.

Wrapped in a cocoon of crimson light, Sakura's being pulsed with full fury the bizarre energy he sensed from her before. Opening her eyes, they gazed back at him golden and completely inhuman. What had she done?

What the fuck had she done to herself!?

His feet carelessly pulled him towards her, Naruto now momentarily forgotten. "You idiot!" he shouted at her, "Do you have any idea what you've done!?" His feet skidded to a halt when he realized he was likely too close, should she deem him to be an enemy while in this state.

Her hand was warm against his cheek, maybe even hotter than the curse seal. Her surrounding energy unfolded into wings, wispy and graceful as its crimson feathers fluttered about her.

"See, Sasuke-kun?" her voice seemed sweet yet somehow unrecognizably cold, "We're not so different, after all."

_We've all our demons._

To be continued…


	14. Ch 14: In the Company of Ghosts

**Wasted Years**

by Mizerable

Ch. 14: In the Company of Ghosts

He had no one to love him.

He lost everything he loved.

She loved all too much.

Beyond the love, beyond the loneliness, all the pain broke free and let the demons come out to play. Little children not so long ago, it was their own blood weighing down each other's hands.

The stains were the only way they could still find each other through the dark.

* * *

Sasuke could still feel her fingers caressing his skin even after her hand dropped away. It had been years since he last registered the sensation of fear and not once was she ever one to draw out such innate terror from him. Sometimes he used to feel panicked over Naruto's often-monstrous strength. But Sakura…

"Get out of the way, Sasuke-kun."

The growl echoing somewhere from behind alerted him to Naruto's presence. Shit…He had to wrap things up right now, then he could figure out what to do about Sakura's transformation.

"It's time to settle things once and for all, dead last. I don't really care what the hell happened to you but if you fuck with me, I'll kill you."

Sasuke could almost hear Yanagi's voice echo through the air. She said almost the exact same words to Jiraiya, hadn't she?

"He can't hear you," Sakura said flatly.

"Fine enough," Sasuke cracked his neck. He could tell Naruto was itching for a fight. If they didn't keep him here and somehow subdue him, he just might turn his attention towards the village. Sasuke wasn't sure what was telling him that but he wasn't going to ignore his instincts on that point. But from the gleam in Naruto's eyes, it seemed the "upgraded" Sakura caused enough of a disruption to hold him at bay for the time being.

Sasuke, however, had no interest in finding out what she was capable of with that power.

With cool regard, Sakura gazed past Sasuke. Perhaps if she held a mind with more clarity at the time, she could have found the irony. When she had Naruto, she could only look beyond him for Sasuke. With Sasuke before her, her sights were set on Naruto. Albeit, her motivations changed dramatically when it came to seeing either one. Women often are said to be difficult to please.

_I promised I would defend my home and my loved ones—_

_I never wanted to fight them._

_Even if it's them, for my home,_

_For their own sake, I will…_

"Naruto, I want you to know I've always cared for you."

Sasuke's focus changed from Naruto to her direction as he watched her hand form a series of seals--a fire attack. While he easily moved out of harm's way, Naruto remained watching the flames encroach on his position. His chakra, strong as always, kept the blaze at a comfortable distance. He even had enough time to deflect the shuriken before her kunai jammed itself into his bicep. Her weight hurled against him was powerful enough to topple them both through the wall and into the adjoining room.

_Naruto would never want to become such a terrifying creature. I know he'll be happy to know I stopped the change. I can save him, even if it means I must…_

* * *

"The kids are getting' rowdy up there," Yanagi drawled between pants, giving Itachi time to spit out a dislodged tooth.

"Is it of any consequence to you?"

"…Not really," she replied, twirling a kunai by the handle around her finger, "Though you mind tellin' me what'cha need that Hunter-nin for?"

"The Nine Tails fox demon is sealed within him. It would be a useful tool to use against the Leaf," Itachi's grip tightened about the handle of his sword, "Though I suppose you don't have the capabilities of sensing such things."

"Can't say I do," Yanagi's palm came to rest at the small of her back with a slight frown pulling at her lips. He got her good in the kidneys. Looks like she'd be pissing blood for a while. "Though I can't say it fits your style. Why the hell do ya care 'bout what happens to the place anyway? Ya could'a taken out a lot more than your clan back then, probably the whole damn village. But ya didn't. Why bother now?"

"The fate of the Leaf matters very little to me."

He considered searching for an opportunity to make eye contact with her, though it would feel like hitting a brick wall more than anything else. The always cool and under control Captain Yanagi, a woman whose will could not be so easily bent with mere cheap suggestion and hypnotism. Itachi didn't often meet an opponent who required imagery burned into their minds in order for him to gain control. The visions his eyes could imprint were most often reserved for those he knew well enough to know just what would break them. There was no sense wasting such a powerful attack on the weak, though. For them, a much more standard death was in order.

Then there was Sasuke. The extra push by showing him the death of his family over and over again sealed the path for his brother. He had been nowhere near the level Itachi was at but the images were necessary. If Sasuke were, in fact, alive, it would be intriguing to know if those memories drove him to finding his strength over these past years.

Dealing with Naruto had been rather simple. Itachi had witnessed enough of the boy's neglect during his time in the village. Broken as he already was, it took little effort to bend the boy's mind and convince him to free his inner demon.

When fighting with an opponent like Yanagi, however, there was no image that could ever faze her. She had seen and done things just as unspeakable as he. She was not a coddled schoolgirl. Yanagi fought nearly every single day in her life and that made her perfect when it came to surviving. She had no jutsus for him to learn. There was no real style to her fighting. But she transformed herself into something beyond his knowledge every time he stared at her across the battlefield. Even now.

He managed to catch her across the ribs with his blade, though not deep enough to earn the immediate kill. She bled enough for it to possibly warrant greater concern later, if she were anyone else. But to a hardened woman like her, it was no more than a pin prick. Her will to live was just so tremendously overwhelming.

"Is your desire to live still so strong?"

"Prob'ly ain't as strong as how much ya wanna die."

Itachi's eyes were slits of burning coal. Yanagi was just as presumptuous as always, it seemed.

"It's awfully bold of you to make such conclusions. You're hardly capable of declaring yourself the victor yet."

"Why didn't ya kill your brother the day ya wiped out the Uchiha clan?" Yanagi's question came as a bit of a surprise. Ten years ago, a young man brutally butchered his entire family, his entire clan. Men, women, babies. They were all murdered, except for the killer's little brother. All this leaves behind one glaring question: why?

"I never imagined he would have survived our last meeting," Itachi stated coolly. If she were asking about Sasuke now, it confirmed that his brother lived after their encounter by the riverbank. Moreover, it seemed Yanagi had taken care of him these past years. How interesting… "The hatred in his heart wasn't enough to defeat me."

It was sort of funny. When she met the boy, all he'd had was hatred. Deep and completely consuming--eating him alive. How could he ever hope to be a successfully shinobi if he relied on such a useless power like emotion. Had Itachi always been so stupid as to push his brother towards gaining power by means of hatred?

"I thought a ninja wasn't supposed ta rely on emotions."

Itachi felt compelled to comment on her knowledge of "textbook" shinobi code. It was a rule every ninja had drilled into their brains from the Academy, if not at an even younger age. Though with her lack of family or formal education to teach her such core rules, it was a tad intriguing to venture guesses as to how she learned such. Itachi had such virtue scored upon his heart from the times in his youth he could no longer recall. The first-born son within a family bearing the name of Uchiha with all the makings of the perfect solider; his mind memorized each rule with the photographic clarity just as his Sharingan recorded jutsu.

Even so, that night…Yes.

He had been angry.

* * *

It was a dark place, a damp place. He visited here before, hadn't he? Things were different from that time. He had been on the other side of the bars, while the beast thrashed about inside its confines. But now his arm extended right to the shoulder, clawing at air hoping almost that the bars would somehow grow further apart or that his body would grow a little thinner. Anything to get out of this damn cage!

It was cold here and quieter than he'd care for it to be. He always hated the silence. It was unrelenting and uncomforting and sometimes he would scream just to remind himself he was still there. He certainly had no one else to do that for him. A cage wasn't very different from the four walls of his tiny apartment, not in principle. There was still no one to fill the silences.

And if he got out of here, what would it change?

* * *

An agonized cry was wrenched from Naruto's throat as his foot lashed out at his latest attacker. Sakura took the brunt of the hit with her crossed arms, forcing some space between the two. Though all in all, she didn't seem to be in any pain. One would think that perhaps she was even stronger than Naruto.

The light pulsing off her gave Sasuke enough of a chance to look her over and confirm her strength. And froze. The bones of her forearm peaked and fell from the flesh; a gushing volcano. She set herself into a fighting stance right before Sasuke yanked her to the side.

"Are you out of your mind? He just broke your arm."

"If you were fighting Itachi, would you stop if he broke your arm?"

No, he wouldn't. He hadn't, in fact. It still hurt every now and then, which was a helpful reminder that Yanagi wasn't a fabulous healer. Another injury like that and he may as well forget about using his left arm ever again. It was usually these reminders that compelled him to buy another round at the bar.

However…

"But you're fighting Naruto. Hardly worth getting your arm broken over."

Naruto was, in fact, stirring again and likely scheming up a lovely plan to eviscerate them both. And to be honest, Sasuke would rather hang himself by his own entrails before losing to the idiot. Especially when it seemed like something else was in the driver's seat of Naruto's body.

He'd seen those eyes before; those crimson slits. A long time ago, Sasuke might have panicked over it or felt threatened over possibly being surpassed by a moron that had a lot more going on than he let on. Hell, Naruto had surpassed him back then. Though in those days, Sasuke hadn't held much appreciation in himself, to the point that it no longer mattered who surpassed him. The end of the narrowing tunnel let his goal slip further and further away, as it took more energy just to wake up in the morning than to formulate plans for vengeance.

It sort of made him wonder how he could change so much when he still struggled to get out of bed everyday. He still chased after Itachi and had every intention of killing him, though he was different now. His body still ached and his ambition still thrived, but he changed somewhere along the way. Now that he actually was scrounging just to survive out in the big, bad world, life was tinted a different shade. Even so, it was only new light, same old hell.

* * *

"Fancy meeting you here."

Anko skidded to a halt as the words reached her ear. Kakashi looked as casual as ever leaning against a tree, hand in his pocket. "I had been under the impression you'd been assigned to a different mission," she replied briskly.

"Plans got changed," Kakashi vaguely gestured to the dilapidated building just ahead.

"You came alone?" Anko observed, "If you were so interested in stopping the Nine Tails, I imagined you would have brought more support."

"It would be dangerous to pull away so many ninja from the village, since this may well be a diversion," Kakashi replied blandly, "Though I assume your being a special Elite Jounin gave you the confidence to come alone."

"I'm sure you know why I'm here."

"…Yes."

The crack of tension snapped the air taut. With no more than a few crisp words, the challenge had been cast.

"A few years ago…you had asked me that if this ever were to happen—"

"I know what I said," Kakashi muttered, "However—"

"It's all through him like cancer!" she shouted, "Do you have any idea how dangerous Sasuke is like that!?"

Kakashi knew. The curse seal was horrid business to deal with. He also couldn't deny that Sasuke had likely committed some terrible acts in his absence from Konoha. Leaving him alive had been a huge liability back when the boy was younger. To ignore it now when they also had the Nine Tails to contend with would be suicide. Also resting in the back of his mind was the anger he still held towards Sasuke over his long absence and everything it entailed.

And yet—

"You're forgetting one of the core fundamentals of being a shinobi," Kakashi stated flatly, "You're letting your emotions make this decision."

"And you're not? Why are you protecting him!?"

"Not so long ago, it was you the Leaf granted mercy."

Anko balked. In those days, she'd been a trusting fool. Following her teacher's every wish, she eagerly donned the perfume of blood. She unknowingly assisted Orochimaru commit atrocities while the curse seal robbed her of all logic. Once she realized what she had become, it was too late to turn back. They were obviously going to kill her for her crimes. Not that she could blame them.

She woke up in a holding cell a great while later with Morino Ibiki sternly observing her. She learned later that the Third Hokage ordered for her life to be spared. But before that news ever reached her ears, Anko, still a child, cried for her mother.

Ibiki informed her that Orochimaru had killed her mother.

"Trying to make up for your mistakes now won't change anything. You must have realized that."

"Of course I know," she muttered, "But if I let him live, who knows how many lives will be lost because of it!"

Kakashi wanted to argue with her but the words didn't come. Sasuke didn't care much for the Leaf either way, at least not outside his own head. He left once and would do exactly that when this was over. Kakashi might have even assumed Sasuke, like his traveling companion, would kill whoever crossed his path on the way out, especially in this state.

But after seeing him this morning with that same haunted look in his eyes from so long ago, Kakashi felt somewhat more compelled to just leave him be. Sasuke had earned a place to rest his head when all this was over. Even if the boy had made his fair share of mistakes, couldn't he be allowed to start living again at some point in his life?

"Killing Sasuke would leave us with something more fearful than the Nine Tails."

It was a viable excuse. Captain Yanagi was fiercely protective of Sasuke for whatever her reasons may be. Knowing how dangerous that young woman was could be something that just might lead Anko to waver in her decision. He certainly didn't want to fight her when they should be stopping Naruto and worrying about the Akatsuki, among other things.

"She's nowhere to be found in the village," Anko announced, her temper quickly fading, "And I doubt she has any knowledge about the Nine Tails."

Kakashi should have anticipated that Yanagi would follow Sasuke here. Perhaps she was the source of that dreadfully powerful chakra challenging Naruto's. Though after viewing her body, he sincerely doubted Yanagi could cram that much energy into her slight frame. While his next conclusion should have been that the chakra belonged to the one who took Naruto in the first place, that wasn't what his gut was telling him. Somehow, just a little, it felt like Sakura.

"What the hell are you two idiots doing?"

The loud gruffness of the voice could only belong to none other than Jiraiya. It wasn't too much of a shock, considering the Nine Tails was about ready to explode against the village. Who else but Jiraiya could come and try to seal the demon back up? Even so…

"Jiraiya-sama!" Anko called in surprise. She didn't think he would leave behind the entire village at a time like this. What if this was part of the Akatsuki's plan? "The village—"

"—Is in good hands," Jiraiya answered with a grin, "Though it seems like your students have gotten out of hand, Kakashi. You certainly haven't been doing a good job at keeping them in line."

"One of them is no long my student."

"He'll always be your student, you know," Jiraiya's attitude sobered to a degree, "He wouldn't have taken this mission at all if the orders came from anyone else but you."

Kakashi begged to differ. The only person Sasuke listened to was Yanagi. But that was a matter for another time. "That second powerful chakra," he began.

"If you think it's coming from your female student…You're absolutely right," Jiraiya explained rather humorlessly, "I think she has gotten herself into quite a bit of trouble."

Kakashi could feel guilt and bile rising in his throat. He sensed earlier today that something wasn't right with Sakura. He knew—still he sent her into combat zone with no idea how dangerous the mission might become and her only help was a traitor shinobi who barely cared about keeping himself safe, never mind anyone else. He let her walk right into hell again.

"Oh, quit sulking already!" Jiraiya demanded, "We've got work to do. I sure hope you're well-versed in gypsy jutsu."

"Gypsy?" Anko was a bit puzzled. She had heard bits and pieces over the years of ancient practices of gypsy clans that predated many hidden villages, though no one knew much of anything about what these techniques actually were.

"They say," Jiraiya started his explanation, "That in the old days, there was a great abundance of knowledge beyond what we possess now. Almost everything was lost in the Great Wars and before there ever was a Konoha. One thing that was lost was the ability to bind demons."

"There was a known way? How come we never sought that information when the Nine Tails appeared?" Kakashi had never heard of this before, which was a rarity in and of itself.

"We had. The Fourth came up empty-handed, though, and we were out of time. The gypsies don't like being found unless they want to be," he answered, "But anything that can be sealed always runs the risk of being released. It looks like the Haruno girl took on a sealed demon of her own."

"Are you saying she's become like Naruto?" Anko asked in shock. Why would anyone willingly choose to take on such responsibility? Her fingers brushed against the mark that wasn't there. Like most things in human nature, it was always there right beneath the skin biding its time until the body chose instinct over reason.

"There's no more time to think about the what-ifs. From the feel of it, the Anbu obviously didn't succeed so there's nothing in the way of the Nine Tails except another demon and a bearer of the curse seal. We need to act now," Jiraiya announced and was pleased that he was met with no opposition.

* * *

She didn't feel so well. Not that she was ever of sparkling health but she had her good days, and then her less-good ones. This one seemed to quite wholly fall in the latter category. Perhaps she should have stayed in that nice bed today, after all. That place was a pleasant dream, though she would always have to wake up at some point. Always she remembered only that life was bleak and usually colder than hell.

The point of her sword bit into the ground as she swayed heavy against it for support. With so much of her splattered about the room, she almost wondered why she didn't feel any lighter.

"Why do you struggle with such earnest?" Itachi's voice seemed more muted to her ears, farther away.

"If I don't kill ya…I'll be executed."

"Wouldn't death be a relief after living as you have?"

Yanagi shook her head and let the doubts tumble from her mind. He was trying to mess with her; she knew him well enough in battle to sense his tricks. Sure, he had all the physical strength one would expect him to possess, but he relied heavily on illusions and trickery. Such attacks would be devastating to most other shinobi, as few, if any were like Yanagi. She was beyond his words and imagery. What could he ever say or show to her that she hadn't experienced or even done to someone else? Even the most horrid of injuries did very little to deter her.

She had no attachments. She never had a home or a family to feel loyalty towards. She made sure her fellow Aohi were alive, as it insured her own safety. If Itachi burned down a village and killed everyone in it, she would hardly care on a humanitarian level. Yanagi cared only about her own well being and nothing else. She possessed the same disposition to commit the same acts as Itachi, should it be necessary for her own survival. She even threatened the Leaf that she would do just that.

If they hurt Uchiha.

Some part of her couldn't lie to herself any longer. Truthfully, she had been stalling in this fight. At first. She had wanted him to be here to see Itachi die. He struggled through three years of hell with her for no other reason than to see that man dead. If it wasn't for Itachi still being alive, Little Uchiha would never have left his home and traveled with her. Though after living the first sixteen alone, she supposed three more years wouldn't have really mattered for much. But all things considered, she realized her foolishness for not ending things sooner.

But there lied her problem. Since when did she care if Little Uchiha was there to witness her murders? She certainly didn't care very much for his revenge or whatever it was. If anything, they would all be better off if she ended things swift and efficiently. She offered to train him and now to even keep him alive. She never swore to let him have any other selfish requests. Selfishness and pride didn't keep a person breathing. Taking action did.

She only offered to train him, wanting him only to not die in return.

She never—

"He was happy once," Itachi spoke blandly, "In those days…"

Yanagi was what she supposed could be called startled, now unable to tear her eyes away from the Sharingan. As if she were standing in that same place during that very moment quite some years ago, she watched him. Excitedly talking at the supper table with a gleeful smile, young Sasuke was at peace with everything around him.

"Such a weak child could not amount to very much. Take everything away from him…and he still could not hate me enough to become stronger."

The bones in his arm easily splintered, the blood gushed thick from his side and he was left by the river to rot. Alone.

"Whatever strength you believe to have imparted upon that child will not suffice. My foolish brother will not survive a second fight."

"What the hell's you talkin' about?" Yanagi growled. She kept her eyes fixated on the floor as she willed herself not to be so shaken up over some damn images. She knew how bad those injuries had been. Seeing how the kid got them was of little consequence. She ended up being stuck with him afterwards and that was that. But she paused a moment, remembering Sasuke at the dinner table. The person he was before becoming Sasuke dying by the river.

"He died ten years ago."

Her eyes the color of angry bruises matched Itachi's gaze again and even he could not mask his surprise completely.

"That kid--That little bastard Uchiha…He used ta smile and enjoy tellin' his mama about his days at school. He liked the way his pop's pipe smoke smelled," Yanagi continued, advancing step by step towards Itachi as the memories she was given of Sasuke's childhood spiraled through her brain, "He was a goddamn different person 'cause of what'cha did! Ya never left a survivor behind that night. You killed that poor kid and left a ghost trailin' in his place. He ain't gonna be able ta rest 'til he gets vengeance for the life ya stole from him."

"And yet he still couldn't stop me…" Itachi murmured, his eyes cooling for only a moment.

The realization hit Yanagi just as hard as the dagger that was driven into her chest. Why hadn't she ever noticed before? Was this something only taught in schools?

Did Little Uchiha know?

Itachi…

Itachi had wanted…

* * *

There was no more room for reason or compassion. Because, more than anything else, none of them wanted to die here. There was such confusion and betrayal and bitterness on all sides and those feelings simply wouldn't fade beneath the stains of time and blood.

His control had all but completely collapsed and it was a struggle to hold onto himself. But it would be a far more hasty suicide if he fought without the curse seal. The other two were far beyond "gone," having given into whatever burden they each carried. Sasuke with his Sharingan observed the crimson eyes of Naruto and the golden ones of Sakura and felt slightly more unwell. Is this how they felt whenever they saw him covered in the black markings?

This was getting ridiculous and he needed to think of some way to stop it. How the hell did he end up fighting these two, anyway? Though the images were aged and faded in his mind, he could still find them. The last time the three, as a team, held a peaceful moment together. Though his mind hadn't been, in his catalog of memories, that night at the ramen shop before hell broke loose had been his last hour of calm. Sakura worried terribly for him that day, as she had all days. And Naruto had been glancing at him inquisitively that evening, never quite figuring out what was wrong with his rival.

In a matter of days, he wound up half-dead halfway from home. If he never left after his brother, his life would have been drastically different. In all likelihood, he wouldn't have survived those three years. He would have been in a coma before he even challenged Itachi. He hadn't been strong enough to live on his own. Not yet, anyway. If he had chosen his quiet and drawn out death within Konoha, how would Yanagi have passed the hours?

He let that thought fall from his mind. He couldn't think about how he had no one here to save his ass this time. Somehow he needed to find a way to end this and find out who the real enemy was. He didn't have time to settle his score with Naruto and Sakura…Or whatever it was, when it came to her.

In a lot of ways, it was greatly his own fault that it happened, her transformation. He had all the sincerity in planning to avoid her, yet his luck was never so fortunate. Their reunion somehow managed to surpass all his expectations when it came to disastrous results. Of all the horribly idiotic things he imagined she would do out of…out of whatever she felt, he didn't expect her to be so damn stupid.

Would she have made the same choices, if he never kissed her back then?

Stumbling back a few steps with a shudder, Sasuke forced down the steady impulses of the curse seal. Naruto, as he was, lost interest in pursuing and chose to resume his fight with the closer opponent, Sakura. She took no notice of her injured arm and even used it again in battle. But as she drove Naruto back, she swayed on her feet once given a moment to breathe. She was likely injured in other places now besides her arm. Her hand wound itself in her hair, palm against her temple.

A tiny angered whimper escaped her throat, her feathers glistening in the dark as they began dropping off in large clumps and floating away to leave behind skeleton wings.

It was killing her.

"Sakura, do you wanna die!?" Sasuke shouted at her, "Stop using that jutsu!"

Her eyes glared with feverish intensity over her shoulder at him, wild and murderous. "Would you care?"

Her voice didn't have the soft ring it normally possessed. Nor its warmth. Nor her. In a matter of moments, Sasuke was in front of her. "If you want to fight anyone, fight me. I doubt that you want to wake up tomorrow and realize you killed that idiot."

"We dated for a while," Sakura murmured, "Naruto and I did…"

Sasuke wasn't sure what he was supposed to say in response to that. It shouldn't have really come as a surprise. Once he had left, Sakura could finally stop wasting all her time and realize there was already someone ready, able, and willing to care for her.

"I was awful then," she continued, her voice sounding hollow, "Even now, all I can do to save him is to take his life--"

Of all people, he surprised himself the most. Her head snapped sharply to the side after his hand connected to her cheek. Her shoulders were shaking, her chest heaving. Somehow, Sasuke never envisioned there would come a point in his life where he would ever physically lash out at Sakura so violently. Just as before, she always managed to pull out the darkest of elements from within him.

She keened forward and Sasuke instinctively caught her shoulders, her body sagging against his.

"I did the best I could," she whispered, "Even so…"

"Why did you learn this jutsu?"

"Was I strong?"

"Too much for your own good."

"Was I like her?"

Sasuke's brows furrowed. He knew Sakura was talking about Yanagi, someone he could never compare her with. If Yanagi was the power, then Sakura was all the grace. Both strong in their own right.

"I never asked you to change."

Back when they were kids, he told her once that when it came to physical combat, she was the worst of their team. So wrapped up in his own mess, he never once thought about the impact that might have had on her. Sakura wanted the elusive strength her teammates had and finally acted out in desperation. Perhaps this, too, was his doing.

"Why did you stop me?"

"I wanted to see your eyes again."

He wished he had thought over that line again, not even sure if he meant it. Though if he were going to be honest with himself, he couldn't deny gold didn't much suit her.

Whatever she said after that was fuzzy and indistinct in his ears. White hot pain seared through his body as Naruto's claws buried themselves deep into the flesh of his back. Sakura was leaning against him as he staggered forward against her. As his vision tunneled, his eyes found hers.

He was sure they were green.

To be continued…


	15. Ch 15: Death Wish

**Wasted Years**

by Mizerable

Ch. 15: Death Wish

She wasn't much for superstitions. She believed in black and white facts--and nothing should have been telling her anything was wrong. She hadn't heard there was a problem. It was just a search-and-rescue mission. They just sent the Anbu as an extra precaution due to current events and rumors. _He_ was just fine.

But she couldn't ignore that feeling, the one that reminded her most of having ice poured inside her stomach. It was an uneasy chill that made her wholeheartedly consider it to be a sign that something was terribly wrong. Walking through abandoned streets usually lined with life only made that feeling swell. Everyone knew trouble was coming and the wait was a killer in its own right. Biding your time quietly knowing you just might be dead by day's end was greatly unsettling, just as much as the actual death in and of itself.

She wished it would just come already. If she were fighting, she wouldn't have to think about him and if he was okay. He was a smart man. Of course he would survive everything just fine, though he'd probably bitch the whole damn time. She allowed herself a wary smile at the thought before sobering again. Maybe she was a little careless to have let herself get so close to him in what was, for lack of a prettier word, wartime. She never could shake that horrible lost and empty sensation from when Sasuke died, and that was someone she hadn't been in love with.

What if that last time she saw him really was the last?

With a sigh, she attempted to shake away the sadness slipping through cracks in her defenses. If anything, it seemed Sakura's habit of assuming the worse was rubbing off on her. Then again, Sakura thought that way since many things in her life did take the harder roads. But this was different. She was different and he was going to come home to her again. He _promised_ he would.

Turning the corner, Ino understood why she was not a superstitious woman. All her panicking and so-called intuition was interpreted in her mind as Shikamaru's trouble. She never anticipated that she would be the one in danger.

His cloak billowed in the gentle breeze, pitch and scarlet. A large sword was secured across his back, suggesting immense physical prowess. Gil-like marks and a sharp grin, along with a scratched-out Hidden Mist headband, were a dead giveaway to his origins. Ino swallowed away her terror as she felt the ice spread through her veins. Calling upon her most confident of smiles, she squared her shoulders and spoke up.

"Identify yourself and state your reason for trespassing in Konoha."

"The reign of the Hidden Villages has come to an end," Kisame replied proudly.

* * *

The blood was cooling on his fingertips, still splattering at his feet while his arm hung limply at his side. He could still move it if he wanted to, unlike the other arm. The puncture had been deep and powerful and the wound wasn't closing itself rapidly as it normally would. But that wasn't at all what concerned Naruto right now. Finishing what he started was more important, both arms capable or not.

But one couldn't quite say Naruto was finishing anything, as he didn't quite start this either. The Nine Tails, on the other hand, was still running the show and it did not believe in taking prisoners. Driven by the most primitive of interests, it would not be sated until it confirmed there were no longer traces of life in any creature that crossed its path; the ultimate of predators. And while the loss of function in one arm was survivable, it was most assuredly not forgettable. It was the woman that injured him so tremendously and she would wholly pay for it, just as the rest of the village would.

She was beneath the crumpled, gushing mess on the floor. His claws had easily sunken through the soft fleshy tissue and corded muscle, leaving behind a gaping wound in the victim's back. The male bled considerably already and smelled of death. The woman was still alive, hands gripped at the fabric of his shirt, tufts of her pastel hair still visible despite the body above concealing most of her in the dark. She was no longer radiating.

His head weighed heavily against her chest just as the rest of his body pinned her down. "Did you die?" she murmured, her voice void of any emotion she may have been feeling. Her eyes continuously cycled in color, jade to gold and back again, though she could barely raise her head to see him. Her limbs felt numbed and fuzzy. The energy bottled up within was surging to burst free but her body simply would not obey its demands.

A choked gasp answered her question and soon wild Sharingan eyes were gazing back at her. The tattooed markings had crossed the whole of his face, down his torso, and around his limbs. Corrosive and laced with spite, not much of him could stare out pass the curse. It wanted to put an end to this fight, this long-standing rivalry—obstacle—and claim a proper victory after suffering so harshly for all these years. Despite its body's shrill protests.

"Goddamn idiot…always fucks up everything," Sasuke growled. Crimson dripped from his lips and splashed against Sakura's pale cheek. Her own insides were being ravaged by the demon growing restless beneath her skin, stealing away all her color. Demons never settled for being confined and human bodies didn't make for the most durable of containers. She was bone white and the heat rolling off her in waves was a fine indicator that she couldn't keep such energy inside much longer. She may have been known for her heightened ability to control chakra, but it was also known that she always possessed substandard stamina no matter how hard she worked. She wasn't going to last.

Though it didn't matter much, either way. Naruto wasn't planning on waiting. He'd lost interest here and wanted to move onto grander things. Just as the villagers hadn't forgotten the Nine Tails, it hadn't forgotten them either. After these two deaths, nothing would stand in its way.

Sasuke struggled to push himself up, or at least his body started moving. He didn't have much say in any of it at all. The curse was in control and he could feel himself die a little more with each breath. With grit teeth, he tried his damnedest to shove the seal away. There was no way this side of hell he would die at the hands of Naruto, not when he was so close to his goal. Maybe when it was all over, he could lay down and—

He made a promise though, hadn't he? He swore he'd survive as payment to Yanagi.

Her words echoed through his mind, grounding him in some small degree. He was getting out of here alive. He'd survive and kill Itachi and follow Yanagi to the ends of the earth. And _nothing_ was going to stand in his way. Not Naruto. Not Saku—

Even looking through the lens of the curse seal, even looking at her shifting eyes, that twinge stirred within him again. That same sense of loss he felt after there initial reunion plagued some part of his mind. He hadn't wanted to see her again and it didn't occur to him until now as to why it was her, more than anyone else, he wanted to avoid.

He didn't want to see how much she changed.

He didn't want to know how much she changed in his absence. It was easy enough to contemplate his own transformation and what that all meant in the grand scheme of things. Now that he was forced to see what three years meant to someone else, he couldn't avoid feeling as if, perhaps, he'd forgotten something important along his journey. But with everything and everyone all as different as they were now, he could never recover what he had lost. He could never return to that time, when he'd so blatantly taken for granted what a comfortable life he truly had before he left Konoha and found Yanagi.

Sakura's eyes grew unexpectedly wide as one hand gripped all the harder on his shirt, the other reaching for the ground so that she might push herself up—arm splintered or not. Even in the hazy light cast from her eyes, Sasuke caught the gleam of a blade reflected in her vision.

Naruto was fully aware of his opponents' disorientation and planned on making full use of it. She saw him coming and clung onto the dying man, both dragging one another away in slow motion inevitability.

_I still love him!_

_I know…I've always known._

The hesitation was unexpected. The excruciating memory should have motivated him further, reminding him once again of just how unneeded he was by everyone. If they were gone, he wouldn't have to be reminded of just how useless he was to them, the ones he used to call teammates. He could forget how terrified he'd been when Sakura was put in the hospital all those years ago. He could forget how much he screamed when he was told Sasuke died. All it took was—

His kunai hit the floor with a heavy thud just before his two opponents met with weakened floorboards and the bottom dropped out beneath them. He could not even attempt a pursuit. His eyes could only stare down at the stained blade piercing through his chest. Overwhelmingly dizzy, he sagged backwards against his unseen attacker, barely able to raise his cooling blue eyes in hopes of discovering his killer's identity.

"You're…still here," he murmured, a bitter ghost of a smile tracing his bloodstained lips. With a wrenched cry, Hinata ripped the sword out and cast it aside. Clutching Naruto to her chest, her body guided his descent as he crumpled to the floor.

"Sorry," he whispered softly, "…made you cry again…"

His body went slack in her arms and she was stunned frozen, tears dripping down her chin and splattering against his cheek. The initial shock slipped away with his breath; her trembling hand smoothed his hair as her iron walls crumbled. After being locked away for so long, she could not suppress the agonizing sob.

* * *

He wasn't going to die here.

Despite all the times he had played through his mind the unavoidable truth that he would be killed in battle, he just couldn't roll over and die like this. Even though it took a blinding moment for his eyes to readjust to the light, he pushed off from the supportive wall and staggered through the trees. He couldn't wait for help to come to him now; he was fortunate enough that he was taken care of enough to make it this far. He just had to get back home.

If there was such a thing as god, he prayed his body would last long enough to deliver him back into her arms one more time.

Just one more time.

* * *

The hideous cry that rang out gave them a clear signal as to where the fighting was. Rushing over the rotten boards and climbing through the sizable hole in the wall, the three paused in unequivocal shock upon arriving on the scene.

Hinata shook with tears as she clutched Naruto's wounded body to hers. The faint light from the seal on Naruto's stomach showed over half the mark had vanished, unraveled. Even in the poor lighting, the grotesque hole in his chest was bubbling over sticky red. The standard Anbu-issued sword lay off to the side, stained in the same color.

Numbly, Kakashi moved forward, vaguely noting the hole in the floor. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he realized he could no longer sense that second powerful chakra. Sakura's chakra. What if she, too…

Coming to their senses, Jiraiya and Anko also made their approach. Anko carefully unwound Hinata from Naruto's form, the girl being too stunned to protest. Jiraiya shook off his vest and pressed it against the gaping wound in Naruto's chest. A glance in Kakashi's direction immediately alerted the jounin to take over in applying pressure in attempts to quell the blood flow. "We still have to seal the Nine Tails," he stated gravely.

"But in his condition that might kill him," Anko retorted in a hissed whisper.

"The wound isn't closing as it normally would, anyway," Kakashi answered, somehow managing to keep his voice even, "We don't have a choice."

"If left alone, the Nine Tails still might break free, which would kill him regardless. We'll have to risk it," Jiraiya stated and took out the necessary scroll.

Perhaps if she'd been of a clearer state of mind, Hinata might have questioned what was happening. Most of the conversation breezed by and she couldn't comprehend a word of it. Though all she could do now was stare and cling numbly to Anko.

A series of hand seals later, Jiraiya pressed his hand against Naruto's stomach. In a flash of light, the Five Finger Seal reactivated its control over the Nine Tails all while Naruto grew colder. It was all he could do against the fox for now. Rendering his blood soaked vest into strips, Jiraiya bound Naruto's chest before scooping him up. "I've got to get him back to the village," he announced rather grimly, "It's up to the two of you to find Sasuke and Sakura as well as perform the proper sealing jutsu on each if need be." Kakashi and Anko nodded as they accepted the mission.

"C'mon, Hinata. You'll be traveling with me."

"Yes, sir," she replied shakily and followed Jiraiya out.

* * *

With a groan, it took full conscious effort to hold back from vomiting as the wave of nausea and agonizing pain rolled through his system. He likely broke a couple of ribs after the unexpected fall. How he was even still alive with that stab wound in his back was anyone's guess.

A long time ago, he asked Yanagi how she could get up time and again everyday after receiving one serious injury after another. After living as she had during these last three years, he was fairly certain he understood her a little better. Just how much did he really want to live? Probably not more than she did but certainly enough to keep his heart pumping. The curse seal, doing what it did best, drew even more chakra from the drying well and pulled him up onto his knees with a shudder.

Slightly more oriented within his surroundings now, he could make note of Sakura. She was blinking away the haze in her brain as blood clouded her vision from a gash on her forehead. She struggled to sit up but he eased her back with the push of his hand against her shoulder, which was incidentally dislocated. "You're in no condition to do anything."

"It won't let me rest," she murmured, eyeing her wounded shoulder. She knew it was injured but somehow the pain wasn't registering. "Don't move," was all the warning Sasuke gave before jerking the joint back into place. She barely flinched.

"I must say I'm impressed," a voice rang out from across the way, "I hadn't expected you to have survived this long."

Chills ran down Sasuke's spine. That voice! It had to be—

His head snapped over in that direction just as that person emerged from the shadows. His face was bloodied and his cloak was torn in places but it was undeniably Itachi Uchiha.

Why now!?

Sasuke could barely breathe because of his injuries. If he fought Itachi in such a state, there was even less of a guarantee he would win. All that was obvious now was that he would likely die right here. Even so, Itachi might kill him now whether he fought back or not. He had no choice but to attempt his vengeance. This is what he suffered for. He left and returned to Konoha because of this man. It was time he ended things once and for all, now matter how little life he had left in his bones.

As he rose to his feet, a small whimper accompanied the hand gripping his sleeve. Sakura had pure terror written across her face as she stared wide-eyed at Itachi. It just couldn't be happening. Not again! The face that haunted her nightmares and plagued even her waking moments was standing in the same room as her again. And this was the same man Sasuke was destined to chase. He'd never make it; not like this.

"Run," she pleaded, though her voice somehow sounded muted to his ears. "He'll kill you!"

"He'll probably kill us either way. There's no way I'm turning tail now."

"But—"A glare stifled her words and she knew she couldn't reach him. He was always just beyond her words.

Itachi was somewhat surprised to realize who the girl was. It had taken him a moment to recognize her as the girl Kisame had captured a few years ago when they were last in the region. It was amazing she was still alive. And it seemed he had been right to assume she knew Sasuke.

"You seem to be rather inept at protecting those around you," Itachi announced, earning a glare along with a snarl from his brother. He supposed it wasn't much of a surprise to see the curse seal covering the boy's body in such a way. At this rate, there wasn't going to be anything left of him. Pathetic.

"You did not heed my warning, little brother," he continued, "Such attachments will only hinder you."

"Don't act like you know everything," Sasuke growled, "She's nothing important to me."

He ignored Sakura's pained gasp. Though she was not bothered so much by his cold words as by Itachi's. He called Sasuke "brother" just now, hadn't he? Was it true? Were Sasuke and Itachi siblings? She was always suspicious of that man's Sharingan, but…

"Is that so…"

Sasuke was caught. No matter how much he tried to avoid it, somehow his eyes would be drawn in by Itachi's, drawn into his twisted genjutsu. He was no longer in the hollowed out building but in a hopeless hotel room. The moon hung bloated and red-tinged beyond the window, casting the room in terrible shadow.

"She is nothing to you?" Itachi's words voiced over the image, the memory, "This does not upset you?" Sasuke wasn't really listening though, too fixated on the display being burned into his mind. Sakura in Itachi's lap, as he moved deeply inside. Her lips against his. Her voice crying out for Itachi, and Itachi alone. Her eyes didn't lie though. They never lie.

Just as quickly as the images came, they suddenly cut off. Snapped back into reality, Sasuke couldn't keep himself on his feet any longer and sank back to his knees gasping. He managed to once again stave off another attack of nausea that threatened his abused senses.

"How the hell—How could you do that to another person?" he snarled. It could have been anyone and that wouldn't have changed how he felt. There were certain things you just didn't do to another human being and what Itachi did to Sakura was one of them. Sasuke wasn't feeling any extra anger because it was Sakura. He didn't. She never meant a damn thing to him. It was just…

"How?" Itachi's voice was even, somehow mocking, "This girl is an acquaintance of yours, is she not? I wondered how much I could destroy around you before it broke you."

Something inside him cracked, his body grew stiff. The attack on Sakura hadn't been as random as he once assumed. It may have been coincidence she was the one girl taken by that other Akatsuki member, but Itachi attacked her solely because she knew him. For all the times his guilt may have led him to believe a lot of things were his fault, now he truly earned the blame. Someone who wasn't involved and had done nothing wrong was attacked so brutally because of him. Because he was too weak to have changed anything then.

If she hadn't been outside his home that night…

If she hadn't…

"It wasn't your fault…Sasuke-kun," her small voice made him flinch, "It wasn't your fault."

Her breath grew more labored, her skin slick with sweat and grime. All the while, her eyes continually cycled between the warring colors. When he last saw her three years ago, she'd been terribly injured at that time, as well. Laid out in that stark hospital bed only because she knew his face…That day, she'd made such sweet sounds for him, too, hadn't she. Maybe Yanagi was right to say he would end up just like his brother.

He really needed a cigarette now.

Suddenly, Sakura struggled to sit up again. "Idiot," he muttered, "Quit pushing yourself."

Her uninjured arm was reaching inside her scroll pouch for something and Sasuke took hold of her wrist. "Your fight is over. Stay out of this."

Gold eyes regarded him coldly, reminding him. He called himself an avenger, seeking to bring down Itachi Uchiha. But considering what that same man had put her through, perhaps vengeance was just as much hers as it was his own.

"This became my most prized possession," she murmured, "Please fight with it." She pressed the object into his palm and he recognized its familiar feel: a Leaf forehead protector. He was sure she lost hers in the fight upstairs. Had she retrieved it at some point?

"Why are you giving me this?"

"It was yours."

Sasuke, even with the curse seal screaming, managed to go pale in stunned shock. She'd held onto this after all these years, kept it close by her side. She really was an idiot for clinging onto whatever she could of him.

Though he didn't hesitate to bind it securely in place before raising crazed Sharingan eyes to his opponent.

* * *

It's always said that the coward is the one who lives longer. She should have known she would pay for being courageous one of these days. Her back connected with a post that splintered on impact. All she could do was curse herself for ever being a headstrong and independent and stupidly brash little girl. What the hell had she been thinking!? Challenging who was obviously not only a stronger opponent, but an Akatsuki shinobi! This man was more likely than not an S-Class criminal and completely out of her capabilities.

More importantly, he was beyond the capabilities of the friends who came to bail her out of the mess she made. Not Chouji, not Kiba with Akamaru. They all held at least chuunin ranking, if not higher, but it was nothing in comparison to what this man could do. Even with all the mechanics down, they quite frankly didn't have the experience needed for such a fight. They weren't the extreme elites like Hinata or…No, she wouldn't think about him. Surely more shinobi were on the way. Shino just showed up, hadn't he? Maybe he would make the difference.

"Ino, get outta there!" Kiba screamed.

She heard him. But with her brain so fuzzy, all she could do was stare up at the descending blade. Flinching in anticipation for her death, she felt the sweep of air but none of the pain. The sword landed in a swirl of dust against the dirt while Kisame's movements jerked to a stop, his hand now pressed against his stomach.

_Shadow-binding…!!_

Not one to waste this opportunity, Ino drew her kunai and with a yell lunged forward. His throat gave way smoothly to her blade and bubbled over before his body hit the ground. With a relieved sigh, Ino expected to see Mr. Nara at the mouth of the street and not Shikamaru himself. Her smile bloomed and withered just as quickly. Even with the cloth wrapped around it and his hand pressed against it, the blood seeped through his fingers and stained the earth below.

Ignoring the others that were rushing to his aid, she sped towards him as his eyes rolled back and his frame fell in a crumpled heap. Hurriedly gathering him into her arms, she willed herself to calm down as she pressed her hand against his wound. The wetness against her thigh spoke for his wounded back. He'd been skewered straight through. Kiba took off in search of a doctor and Chouji handed Ino his scarf to apply to the wound.

"Shika—" she choked back a sob, "Shikamaru, wake up. You need to keep your eyes open."

His eyes slipped back open halfway and a bitter smile tugged at his lips. "Hey," he murmured, "…made it back."

Ino nodded and took his hand, not caring who saw her crying by now. "Yeah," she whispered, "Welcome home."

* * *

Somehow he managed to climb to his feet and not pass out. He knew the curse seal had destroyed much of his body by now, not even counting the severity of his other injuries. Just as he thought all along, he was never meant to survive facing Itachi. But so long as that man died, as well…

He was about to launch his first attack when Sakura called him to a halt. He really didn't need her distracting him right now. "What?" he growled. Didn't she realize he didn't have time for her?

"…feet," her voice was raspy, "There's another set of feet…"

Sasuke could think of a colorful string of curses right now, a habit he picked up from Yanagi. What the hell was Sakura babbling about—

How did he miss it before?

Dangling from beneath Itachi's cloak was a pair of feet. He had someone with him, another victim.

"What did you do…?" Sasuke's voice was failing him. Even in the dim light, he knew those tattered sandals looked familiar. It couldn't be—She wouldn't—She—

Itachi let his cloak drop to the floor to reveal his hidden secret. Letting her dangle by the neck, the unmistakable body of Yanagi hung lifeless from his fingertips with his knife still embedded in her chest.

Sasuke's mouth opened several times but only an undignified crack of his voice came out. There was no way. There was no way Yanagi could be killed when she was so close to freedom. This had to be genjutsu, another one of his tricks. She was too strong.

"You were a fool," Itachi declared blandly, "To depend on this woman so much. And now she, too, lost her life because you couldn't stop me."

It wasn't fair. How much did Sasuke have to suffer? The only thing—The only person Sakura had ever seen Sasuke feel at ease around was now lost because of one man's sick ambitions. What did he want? Why was he putting Sasuke through so much agony?

"How much more capable of hating me are you now, little brother?" Itachi's voice almost seemed accusatory, "Was this one pathetic woman's death enough to make you kill me?"

" 'Pathetic'? That's one hell of thing ta say about your rival."

She was alive! But there had been no chakra emitted by her body. No breath. How was she still living!?

Itachi didn't care to find out how she managed to surprise him again and attempted to toss her aside. She reached her arm behind and held his wrist stiffly in place. In a fluid sweep, Yanagi swung herself around, yanked the knife from her chest, and brought the blade down. Itachi howled after the point punctured his eye before succeeding in sending Yanagi skidding across the floor. Staggering backwards, he wrenched the weapon from his socket with a splattering sound reminiscent of a knife scooping the innards of a pumpkin.

Sasuke wasn't about to let this chance slip away and charged forward with Chidori. Even in his haze, Itachi managed to hold off the fatal blow. But Sasuke wasn't one to make the same mistake twice. The attack fizzled out unexpectedly, revealing the dagger firmly in his grip. He shoved forward and managed a shallow gash but Itachi, whose body was in shock from the injury Yanagi dealt him, could not keep his grip on Sasuke's arm.

With a final scream, Sasuke plunged the blade deep into Itachi's abdomen--a critical hit. Itachi choked and sputtered a moment before teetering over. It wasn't just this wound; Yanagi had done considerable damage even before she took out his eye. He foolishly used Tsukiyomi in great excess today. That last attack…

Sasuke didn't seem convinced. It had been too damn easy. He was well aware that he must have improved over these last three years, but there was no way he could have defeated Itachi so simply. There had to be more to this. "Get up," he snarled, teeth bared, "I said _get up!_"

" 'Don't think he's…goin' nowhere, Uchiha," Yanagi mumbled off to the side, trying to pull herself off the floor, "…kicked his ass pretty good…before you got here."

Sasuke shot an incredulous glare in her direction, staggering slightly from a wave of dizziness. Itachi hadn't gotten up, his good eye a sooty coal staring at the ceiling. Sasuke may have doubted the possibility of it coming to pass, but that final blow hit the liver. Itachi knew he would not be getting up again.

"It seems…your hatred was sufficient…"

"So that's it?" Sasuke sneered, "You killed--You had me chase you around ten years for this?"

It was a pathetic death, most of which wasn't even his doing. It certainly hadn't gone as he always envisioned it would. He never thought he and his brother would meet in such terrible shape even before fighting one another.

"It was very important…" Itachi murmured, "Otherwise, it would have…truly broken you, little brother."

"What the hell are you talking about?" he snapped.

"You don't know…what the Mangekyo Sharingan does…" Itachi could sense his brother's rage even if his vision was too dimmed to see it, "It _changes_ a person."

Sasuke could not deny his confusion now, though he supposed perhaps the curse seal had taken his logic. He had to be missing something right now. And, truth be told, he was. Itachi had been younger than Sasuke was now when he learned the final piece of the Sharingan; horrible images that left him screaming at night. Or they would have, if he could get the emotions past his skin. So perfected a soldier at such a young age, he had no one to tell "it hurts". He surpassed even his father's skill before he ever became a teenager and exceeded in staining his hands with even more blood. But to show he was just a scared child on the inside would have been a grave insult to the integrity of the Uchiha clan.

He was fine enough keeping his mouth shut and suffering in silence just as he was taught. Bound by a code of honor that even preceded shinobi law, he held the honor of his family in his dirty hands. But his brother grew older. How long before he, too, would have to become like him? Would the Sharingan eat away at Sasuke's mind the way it had at his own?

He'd heard the talks. They were going to start preparing his little brother for the rigorous training necessary to draw out the Sharingan. At least they were kind enough to wait until he grew a little older after they probably realized the "mistake" they'd made in pushing the burden on Itachi so young. Soon the brother who smiled so freely would be an emotionless zombie just like all the other respectable Uchiha shinobi. And no one seemed to care, not even their own parents could see what was bound to happen.

So he killed them. He killed all of them with the only thing he had left: his anger, his hatred. His rage for them making him what his was, his rage for their plans to do the same to his brother. He passed that hate on to Sasuke and left Konoha with absolutely nothing but a tremendous power that was useful for nothing more than destroying. And so he destroyed, for what other purpose did he have?

"It would have…destroyed you…" Itachi's voice grew faint, "The hideous power of our family…"

"Why are you telling me this _now_?" his voice sounding almost…betrayed, "_Why now!?_ You stole everything from me!"

"You still have your hatred…" Itachi replied, "If you can feel enough to hate me…it means you're still human."

Sasuke's wobbling legs gave out from under him, sending a sharp jolt of pain through his system after his several injuries were aggravated. Itachi was well aware of how much Sasuke must have suffered on account of him. But to still have so much passion left—no, he had no regrets. It was painful for his brother to transform himself into such a creature, enough so to attract Orochimaru's attention and be given a curse seal. But when this was over, Sasuke could rest a little easier. Sasuke only needed to become a monster to hunt him; he didn't need to remain one like Itachi had.

"You've grown strong, Sasuke."

"Don't—Don't you dare--"

"They say only a…true Sharingan master can defeat another one. It would have been nice…for there to be an easier way…" Itachi's head listed to the side. He wouldn't be able to keep his eye open for much longer. There was still so much he wished he could say. "I'm sorry…"

"Don't say it!" his shoulders were trembling, his lips began to quiver, "Don't fucking say that to me now!"

Itachi became very still, the spasms racing through his body halted. Sasuke's eyes grew impossibly wide as he reached out a trembling hand. "Ita…" he gripped the man's shoulder and shook hesitantly. He drew out no reaction and jerked the body more harshly. "Itachi…_Itachi!!_"

He was suddenly yanked backwards, his body shaking uncontrollably while Yanagi kept firm hold of him.

"Easy…easy," she murmured in his ear, "This's what you wanted, ain't it?"

He couldn't pull his eyes away from the body before him. This was it. Ten years of hunting, sacrificing, and suffering were all for this moment. He avenged his clan and the personal hell their deaths had drawn him into. Itachi Uchiha was dead. Sasuke had always pictured this moment in his mind but it somehow seemed so much grander than what he was experiencing right now. It was all over. Simply…over.

It had been so long since he knew of a life without his ambition, without his vengeance. Strangely, he could barely even remember the details anymore. What did his mother's perfume smell like? What did his father's laughter sound like? Stealing one life didn't replace the loss of the others. He could never return to that time. He knew that all along. He knew. And yet—

"Oh my god…" the murmured voice brought his head snapping up to see Anko standing nearby. She hadn't anticipated this at all. They heard the fighting, the yelling and came rushing in but had been too frozen to move. They could only watch Itachi's life quietly slip away, just like any other dying man.

She shook her head and focused on the task at hand. Sasuke had been terribly injured on top of the fact that the curse seal covered his skin. He really fought with more than everything he had today, just as Sakura had. She left the girl for Kakashi to take care of, as she would take charge of the curse seal. It also seemed that Aohi captain wasn't fairing much better, to the point that she wasn't spitting acid at Anko for walking too close to them.

"Sasuke, you've got to stop using the curse seal. With your injuries, you won't last much longer."

He focused his eyes enough to look at her face and she didn't find madness in his gaze. Only an emptiness that made even her heart twinge in sorrow for him. He didn't say anything to her, nor did he fight off the seal.

"I'm leaving," Kakashi announced, unable to hide the graveness of his tone. The others looked over in his direction to see him carrying Sakura in his arms. He didn't need to say it. Her bleached skin stained with blood spoke volumes. She probably wouldn't make it. And Sasuke could not stop staring.

_Sakura…_

_Will she, too…?_

His thoughts cut short as Yanagi leaned heavily against him. He was too numb to feel the pain in his back from her added weight.

"We had a deal, Uchiha," she mumbled softly against his shoulder, "Don't break your promise."

"…I won't," he replied softly, eyes glued on Kakashi's retreating form. Or rather, Sakura's hand limply dangling as he carried her away.

_I won't die._

To be continued…


	16. Ch 16: The Value of Freedom

**Wasted Years**

by Mizerable

Ch. 16: The Value of Freedom

With a sigh, Tsunade brushed aside the loose strands of hair falling in her face as she leaned back in her chair. It had been a long day.

"Tsunade-sama?" Shizune approached, nearly causing the other woman to jump in surprise, "Your coffee." She nodded graciously and accepted the cup with both hands, enjoying the aroma. Shizune waited a moment to let Tsunade indulge in its warmth before pursuing any further questions.

"How does it look for everyone?"

"Hmm…Some are better off than others," Tsunade replied evenly, "We're just lucky more people didn't get caught up in this mess."

Yes, the explosion set off near the front gates injured only a few. Luckily, those members of the Akatsuki responsible had only been mere underlings and were quickly disposed of by a few jounin. Those Leaf shinobi could be sent home after a quick visit with her. However, it seemed the big brass had only meant for those weaker ninja to be cannon fodder, a diversion. Or so they tried. That explosion went off assuming the higher-ups would be alive to do their jobs. Regardless of the Akatsuki's failure, it still managed to put some of Konoha's shinobi against some less-than-promising odds.

Tsunade's day had nowhere else to go but down from there. Of the shinobi that were brought to her with critical injuries, it was a sheer miracle she brought any of them to stable condition. Which wasn't much. She wished she had enough energy to heal them completely but those kids were all in such miserable shape that she barely had enough chakra to keep any of them from going into cardiac arrest. Even with the wounds closed, it was difficult to say if they would all make it. For her to have this much difficulty in medical treatment was a small sign of how intensely each had fought out there.

It had been a long day.

* * *

Sounds came back first, almost like listening underwater. Then came light, blinding and blurry. It took several moments and much blinking to discern the shapes hovering about. Finally, voice was found and made itself known.

"Iruka-sensei?"

Iruka was startled by the sudden noise and found Naruto's tired eyes looking up at him. With a relieved sigh, he took a seat at the edge of the bed by the boy's side. "How long've I been out?" he sounded drowsy, medicated.

"It's been a couple of days."

"Oh." Naruto stared out the window for a moment, trying to sort out everything in his mind. He knew a lot of things happened, though most of it wasn't so clear. He got the impression, however, that none of it was pleasant.

"Sensei…I think I did some bad things."

Iruka frowned at that. He should have known Naruto would think everything was his fault. "They managed to crack the seal…You're hardly to blame for any of this."

"It's hardly gonna look like that to anybody else. The blood's on my hands," Naruto could barely contain his self-loathing as he gripped the sheets in tight bunches, "Especially now that Sakura-chan and that jerk Sasuke are—"

"They're alive, Naruto."

His eyes widened in absolute shock. There was no way they could have survived.

"But—but they fell! And Sasuke was bleeding pretty bad--!!"

"It's true they were in bad shape but you're not the one who did it. It was the Nine Tails. And those two know better than anyone that you wouldn't do such things to another person."

Naruto didn't look so convinced; his guilt was threatening to swallow him whole. No matter what Iruka said, even if they were alive they would never believe him. Why didn't Hinata finish him off when she had the chance?

_Hinata!_

What the hell had he been thinking with her the other night? It probably wouldn't be worth trying to sort it all out now, not after everything that happened. She was the one who ran him through with the sword. It was safe to say that things with her, like with everyone else, was destroyed. He'd burned all his bridges this time.

"It doesn't matter if it wasn't 'me.' The only thing they'll remember from the fight is my face."

"Perhaps the time has come to tell them the truth."

Naruto gave him a look of sheer disbelief. All the people from his past, the ones he grew up with through his academy days right until now…Everything between them was so horribly tense. If he were to tell them his horrible secret, if they knew of the demon he carried…He'd rather die than face the rejection.

"Sakura isn't so different now…" Iruka spoke uneasily; he never thought a bright student like her would have willingly done such a terrible thing to herself, "Kakashi thinks it was a phoenix."

"Sakura-chan's a demon, too?"

"Sakura _has_ a demon. Neither of you actually are ones," Iruka paused. It pained him to even think of the other one, what had happened to him, "Only Sasuke transformed himself into something terrible."

"Was it really worth that much? His mission…"

"Hmm…I suppose that's something Sasuke will have to decide for himself, now that he achieved his vengeance."

Naruto shot up in bed, his face drained white. Sasuke got his revenge? His only goal in life was complete??

That meant…

The man who hurt Sakura had been there at the fight and he never even knew. Yet Sasuke was still able to fight and kill that man, despite how horribly Naruto had wounded him.

Iruka wasn't even able to call after him as Naruto bolted out of the room.

* * *

Sasuke watched her. He'd been watching her for a while now. It wasn't out of any great admiration or infatuation, only an almost unsettling fit of curiosity. Of necessity. Somehow he felt if he looked away, the image of her in his mind would slip away forgotten and irredeemable. Perched upon the windowsill, the choppy sunlight cast golden slivers through the blinds and distorted her features. Though it made her face harder to place, something about the light made her appealing. Just a little.

"There a reason you starin' at me that hard?" Yanagi puffed away on her tobacco.

"I don't think I'll remember who you are if I look away."

Yanagi finally climbed down to face him, to face Sasuke. Or rather, to face what should have been Sasuke. Even after his wounds were mostly closed up, he held all the color of a corpse lying stiffly on the hospital bed. Perhaps that, too, was somewhat of a false statement. Half of his face was not bleached, but was covered in the scrawled tattoos of the curse seal. The markings drew down along the left side of his body and were concealed beneath fresh bandages. Hidden.

"Guess it's just a matter a' time…"

_…Before it eats away at you completely._

"Probably," Sasuke murmured, testing the phantom sensations in his consumed hand, "Do you know what's next, Captain?"

Yanagi raised an eyebrow, analyzing his words carefully. She grimly hoped he was being general. She couldn't say what would actually happen to Sasuke. She didn't have much knowledge at all when it came to this sort of thing. He really could make her feel very foolish.

"Grass Village," came her clipped response, "Ya gonna be able ta fight, with your arm like that?"

"I don't know."

The creases on her weathered face became more defined as she observed him. It was strange, really. Through the course of three years she had managed to take a wounded child, make him something akin to greatness, only to find everything back the way it had been at the beginning of their journey.

"You need painkillers?" she asked coolly, not at all concerned. She was never concerned.

"Being like this," he eyes the left side, eyed his flexing fingers that moved without his knowledge of their moving, "It feels like…paralysis."

Yanagi said nothing to that. She busied herself with disconnecting his limbs from the strange beeping machines and confusing tubes. Yanagi had never been treated at a hospital for any of her wounds. It was always locals that she took advantage of to help with her injuries, until she was old enough to take care of herself. An environment like this only gave her a sense of unease and mistrust. Even when Tsunade treated and bound the stab wound in her chest, it had made her uncomfortable. Yanagi had been left to her own devices afterwards, mostly consisting of keeping watch over that idiot Uchiha.

She could do without this place.

"You knew my broth—Itachi. Before," Sasuke trailed off and received a vague affirmation, "You used to be friends?"

"He used to be a lot of things."

"Why did everything change?"

She heard his other questions. Of course she was just like Itachi in many ways. She was a murderer and had no reason to feel upset or remorseful about that. Naturally, they were both intrigued by the other. However—

"He was a man waitin' his entire life for his killer. Was only a matter of time before he tried to make me that person," Yanagi exhaled heavily, smoke curling around her hazy features, "Somehow, I just couldn't be."

She pointed at a particularly ugly scar between ribs. It was an older scar, stretched out from signs of growth and age.

"It ain't much of a surprise though. I think it was fairly obvious he'd chosen his death long ago. Before this wound."

_You've grown strong, Sasuke._

"I guess so…" he croaked, "There was no avoiding it."

"Ya shouldn't sound so bleak," Yanagi chided, though her voice sounded somewhat distant to him, "You've had your vengeance. Ain't ya a little bit happy 'bout that?"

Sasuke sat up; his movements were somewhat rigid. Somewhat mechanical. When his eyes focused on her form again, she finally found a part of him staring back. Something more than the emptiness – a deep sense of resignation. She did not find it to be at all welcoming.

"I don't feel anything."

"At least you's still alive," Yanagi spoke in a rushed murmur as she made way to the door. All without looking back. Never turning back.

" 'Still alive'…huh?"

Sasuke vaguely recognized someone else was with Yanagi at the threshold, someone who was watching him. He stared for a moment. And then another. He felt something pull at the muddled fragments of memory as he tried to piece everything together in his mind.

"…Naruto?"

"Iruka-sensei told me you were alive, so I—He said you avenged your family—I, um—"

"Idiot," Sasuke mumbled, "Since when did you have so much trouble speaking?" The simple banter seemed familiar and put him at ease. They used to speak to each other more fluidly, without the strange stiffness of formality that seemed to be floating over them now. This was just theater now. They no longer knew how to relate as they once had. A lack of connection, a lack of remembrance. The bonds were snapped.

"What will you do now?"

"I'm leaving," Sasuke answered, more interested in seeing if he would be steady on his feet than answering questions.

"You completed your goal!" Naruto shot back, "Why the hell would you leave now?"

"I gave my word," he replied, remembered. She had left the room, but he could still remember. "Nothing binds me to this place, anyway. There's no point in staying."

"But this is your home!"

"There's no one waiting for me at home," Sasuke's voice bordered on a growl as he pushed past Naruto, "I won't return to this place again."

Sasuke stepped out into the hallway with full intent of stalking straight from this hellhole through the gates of this village. Never turning back. His senses were fuzzy and his mind was numb and his insides felt twisted but at least he could leave on his own.

And for Yanagi.

Perhaps not so much "on his own" as he'd like to believe.

"She would wait for you!" Naruto shouted down the hall, catching the attention of bystanders, "Sakura-chan would…"

Sasuke jolted to a halt and remained rooted in place, without motion. Without sound. Quietly feeling out the words, quietly recollecting her face. There was something stark and honest about those memories, something even the curse seal hadn't yet the chance to strip away from his mind.

"…I know."

Naruto couldn't find anything to say to that. What _could_ he say to something like that? In all his life, he never once heard Sasuke acknowledge Sakura's feelings. The bastard knew she was sincere and he was still going to leave her behind regardless. He really could be cruel.

"We still haven't settled things between us," Naruto mumbled, "I didn't want it this way."

"You really are an idiot," Sasuke glanced over his shoulder, the pale half of his face showing, "There's no need to drag out this rivalry. You surpassed me years ago."

Naruto wholeheartedly refused to believe it. Sure, he could hold his own against Sasuke back when they were kids. Back, before he left. But there was no way the genius from the most prestigious clan--

That no longer exists.

--Lost to him. To Naruto, the village idiot--

_Who holds the unfathomable power of the Nine Tails._

"So you're just gonna let it drop?" Naruto retorted, feeling his desperation swell, "You're not even gonna bother chasing me?"

"There's no reason. I was strong enough to…" There was no need to say the rest. Even Naruto could understand that. That's why he kept quiet when Sasuke turned away.

"Sasuke-kun…?"

He couldn't help but sigh. With the light pouring through the doors ahead, he almost thought he could be free. But Sakura always had been a terribly stubborn girl. It was sort of funny that he could recall her so much more clearly than Naruto. Even more so than Yanagi. What a ruthless woman she could be.

"So…you're leaving now?" her voice was a sturdy brick house built on quicksand.

_I thought you could use more rest._

"Aa."

"To where?"

_How far will this take you from here?_

"Grass Village."

"Oh."

_This really is goodbye._

"Sasuke-kun…I'm really glad I got to see you again," she fidgeted at the hem of her hospital smock. She kept her eyes averted. She knew the seal had stolen some of him and that wasn't how she wished to remember him. "And—And I'm glad that you're free."

Sasuke visibly flinched at that word. Free? Was that what this was?

"Am I?" he spoke blandly, softly, "Am I free?"

He didn't need to look at her to know she was nodding fervently. Somehow he could sense her every movement, even if she was wrong about this. With the curse seal taking over, he knew there would be not even a bittersweet celebration for his so-called victory. He couldn't enjoy a drink due to his lost sense of taste. Every sound he heard echoed muffled and every color muted. He couldn't really feel half of his body anymore. He lost it somewhere along the way.

Though some part of his mind believed it could register the perfume Sakura used to like still clinging to her somehow—a phantom sensation.

"I won't forget any of this, Sasuke-kun," Sakura continued, "None of us were perfect but we survived. I swear I won't forget it. And I won't forget you."

"It would be better if you did," Sasuke answered, never turning back, "There's no longer reason to remember me, or what happened to you because of me. You've been avenged. That should be enough."

"This wasn't just about you," Sakura kept her voice composed despite her shaking hands, "We all made mistakes and endured a lot for our choices. But we learned and grew from it. Together…Like old times."

" 'Old times'…?" Naruto echoed softly. It had been a long time since the glory days of Team Seven. And those times were coming to an end, as soon as Sasuke walked through those doors and out of their lives forever.

And, as always, Kakashi kept watch over his students in the distance. He could even see across the hall as Ino cooed over the resting Shikamaru. At least there was some measure of happiness to be found in this lousy place.

"Is it really a good idea to let him go like that?" he asked the person leaning against the wall with him.

"Would you tell him 'no'?" Yanagi replied, exhaling her smoke.

"He's going to die out there."

"I know."

Kakashi raised an eyebrow. Only a little while ago, she'd chase off anyone who tried to give Sasuke a paper cut. Now she was cold and uninterested as he was heading towards his death.

"It's gonna kill him anyhow, ya know. At least if he leaves now, it gives those other kids some hope that Uchiha might be alive years from now…If they don't see it happen," Yanagi explained, "It'd be pathetic ta watch him waste his last days in a place like this, anyway."

She was compassionate, more so than he ever expected of her. He shouldn't have been so surprised, really. Beneath the dirt and damaged skin was a woman who, above all things, was merely rather unfortunate. Kakashi wondered what sort of woman she might have been if raised under the care of this village.

"If he goes, then at least it's his own choice now."

There's no road laid out by Itachi.

Yanagi kept her face even. She killed the chill in her bones before it ran its course through her body.

_His own choice…_

"I—I guess nothing I say really matters to you, right?" Sakura faked an air of nonchalant humor, "But I hope you've found your peace."

"Maybe," Sasuke began unexpectedly, "Maybe you can sleep a little easier at night now."

_Because I never will._

"I'm surprised you could tell," Sakura admitted. She knew that between her meticulous care to hide her insomnia and Sasuke's apathy, it was highly unlikely he would have noticed. But she supposed she should have expected it from the "Uchiha Genius." Somehow now that she was on the same level with the boys, she was sure she understood the isolation a little more. She wouldn't have enjoyed being called a genius for what she did with her power, either.

"Of course I noticed," Sasuke replied plainly, glancing back at her, "Your eyes never lie to me."

It was the Sharingan eye watching her, the possessed eye. The lost eye. The lost part of Sasuke he let go of for his ambition. The part that, in some way, was lost for her sake as well. She couldn't run away from this. She couldn't forget this sacrifice. She had to remember him this way, the true way. She steeled her hand and rested it against his bandaged arm. Cursed arm. Sasuke's arm.

"Good luck, Sasuke-kun," Sakura smiled warmly, making her own sacrifice.

"Sakura," he looked towards the door. Towards freedom. Never looking back. His other hand, the untainted one, covered her fingers absently. "Thank you."

Her bewilderment gave Sasuke opportunity to unfasten her fingers from his arm and perhaps their hands lingered together longer than necessary before he slipped out beyond the light. Perhaps.

* * *

Yanagi strolled past Sakura, ignoring her prettiness, before disappearing outside and came up along side Sasuke. She didn't need to say anything. Silence spoke volumes for them, or at least it had when Sasuke was Sasuke. But things were different now. He was different now. Nothing held him to this world except for his oath. He swore his loyalty to the Aohi and to her.

He accomplished his goal and climbed out of his cage only to find himself in a room with no windows and locked doors. And Yanagi held the keys. Even she, in the end, stole his freedom. It didn't really matter, she supposed. His freedom meant very little to her own survival. If keeping him bound to her kept her safe, then that was what had to be. But she'd promised him freedom, hadn't she? Just how considerate was she being to make him die in some stupid war when his battle was over? Though not much for scruples, he hadn't betrayed her and that earned some sort of compensation to keep things that way. It was purely a matter of principle. Maybe she should offer the courtesy Itachi had sought from her long ago, now that she had the strength for it.

Perhaps, peace for him was…

Catching a glance at his profile, she almost choked in surprise. His china white skin had been returned to its flawless form. There was no sign of the curse seal anywhere. Only dark eyes focused on the narrowing tunnel. He was still walking towards his grave.

All her drive seemed to drift away from her like smoke. No, he wasn't like Itachi. He didn't truly wish for…Yanagi had no words to offer, not even his last rites.

* * *

Naruto didn't know what to say now. She was the girl he'd sworn to protect, to make smile. Through with all the hurt he put her through, he wasn't even sure there were words to make everything better. Almost willing to just turn tail and walk away from it all, he couldn't help but glance once more at her. Something that possibly qualified as a laugh floated from her direction as he watched her shoulders quiver.

"I can't believe," Sakura clasped a hand over her mouth, catching her tears and hiding her awkward smile, "The old woman was right, after all."

Naruto could only nod vaguely. He didn't really know what Sakura was talking about but he wasn't really interested in hearing the back story. He was surprisingly tired, despite his wounds being closed. It was a soul weariness, the type that used to keep him awake at night. It had been easier to ignore when she comforted him and let him pretend everything was all right.

But then again, he was the one who instantly tried to fill the hole with someone else when she was gone. He only ended up hurting yet another person, rather than helping any of them. After all, it wasn't like he was able to support Sakura the way that guy could.

_Sasuke, you're wrong. I'll never catch up to you, not where it counts._

Naruto shuffled off in the other direction, never turning back.

"Naruto!"

Her voice caught him by surprise and stopped him dead in his tracks.

"Are we…still friends?"

The word "friend" was a jolt to the system, and not so much in the way he had anticipated from her. It hurt to let his lips curl upward, but it was a different hurt than from before. It was the transition that hurt, not the way either felt towards the other. Change was never easy but with it came strength and if there was anything Naruto held pride in, it was growing stronger. He could run at these growing pains head-on if he had to.

"Dummy," he gave his infamous fox grin, "What are you still doing here?"

Sakura blinked wildly. That hadn't exactly been what she expected. If he was going to say no, the least he could do was be cold. Though, perhaps this was just part of her punishment.

"How come you're standing here talking to me and not chasing after that idiot? He's gonna end up doing something stupid if you leave him alone for too long."

_Naruto--!! All along, you've…_

"It's not my choice to make," Sakura admitted thoughtfully, "There are things that can be changed, and things that can't. He has to walk his own path. But someday, if he should return to this place, we'll welcome him with open arms. Right?"

"Can--Can we have ramen then?"

"Of course," her smile was honest, yet somehow unfamiliar. It had been too long.

Sakura went her own way, leaving Naruto to his own devices. Outside the sun was high and bright overhead. People changed but at least the sun was still warm.

"Everyone's gone their separate ways, it seems."

"I guess I owe you an even bigger apology than Sakura-chan," Naruto turned to face Hinata.

"It couldn't be helped," she replied blandly, "The Akatsuki were using you as a pawn. You're hardly at fault for what happened."

"…That's not what I meant."

Hinata let the silence simmer for a bit, let the wind talk for them. It was time to get right to the point, even if it was him. They were beyond the fear now. No sense in being shy.

"We…We were both very drunk the other night. No one is to blame for that, either."

"Is it okay? To leave things like this."

"What do you want to come of this?" Hinata played the aloof card. If she were distant, it would hurt less.

Naruto wasn't sure how to answer the question. What, exactly, did he want? Attention? Sex? …Acceptance?

He swallowed hard and braced himself. Maybe it was time people knew the truth.

"I'm the fox demon, you know."

"I know. Jiraiya-sama told me," Hinata answered, "But that's not what I asked you."

"You—you don't care?" Naruto knew he was shaking. This had to be a trick. Even though Hinata wasn't that kind of girl, there was no way she could brush off what he said so easily. "Didn't you hear what I just said? I'm the—"

"So what?" she answered briskly, "You were the fox the other night. And you were the fox during our Academy days while you were pulling pranks. Knowing now what you've been all along doesn't change who you are or what I've thought of you."

"Hinata, you—"

"I've—I've watched you for a long time now, Naruto. I've always a-admired your strength and I think I was able to change from watching you grow as a person."

Naruto braced his hand against the wall, his head felt light and dizzy. He knew he was a little slow and often had difficulty noticing things but he really could be an idiot.

"I'm very tired from everything so I'm going to get some rest before my next mission," Hinata turned away, "Goodbye—"

Naruto grasped desperately onto her wrist, but couldn't raise his eyes when she glanced back at him with a quizzical expression.

"Na, Hinata," Naruto murmured, praying her eyes wouldn't notice his flushed face, "Do you think, maybe we could, try together…to…um…"

Her hand slithered away from his grip, leaving him hanging in disappointment before her fingers intertwined with his. They didn't need to say it aloud to make it official. Slowly, and a little awkwardly, they were going to try.

_Yes, we could try together…_

* * *

Despite her earlier misgivings, Yanagi eventually stopped complaining and allowed herself to be spoiled with a decent meal and some necessary supplies. Or at least she stopped complaining about the food. She had yet to cease tugging at the collar of her shirt, however. It was a bit stiff from disuse but at least it was dry and not a hole to be found in it.

"Not that it's my business," Yanagi peered down at the deep hue of the fabric, "But why do you got a lady's shirt like this, anyway?"

"It was my mother's."

No further explanation was necessary. She hardly felt embarrassed for asking, even if it was probably a sore subject for him. That was Yanagi for you, though. Her questions were always exact and she always expected the response to be the same. Small talk was never something she really favored. Especially now that the gates were looming in the distance, it was a time for planning battle strategies and not for mindless chatter.

Even so, her mind was buzzing with thoughts that had no place or familiarity. Somehow the world she once knew had changed after she arrived in this village. Or, perhaps, she was the one who changed. Her stride became a shuffle and her shuffle became still. A few steps later and Sasuke, too, came to a stop.

"What?"

"What're you fightin' for?"

"I promised you, didn't I?" he answered wearily, "I'm not gonna back out now, if that's what you're afraid of."

Yanagi was wrong. The door had been open all along, but Sasuke was too damn stubborn to walk through it by himself.

Was he really going through with this for her sake?

"Ya know you prob'ly gonna die if ya go," Yanagi's voice became hard.

"There's not much I can do about that now," he answered grimly, "I sold my soul to get here. Nothing I've done will go by without a price."

She smacked him hard enough to force him off balance, indigo eyes now piercing daggers. He did, however, manage to look rather surprised anyway.

"I thought you was a man of your word."

"What are—"

"I almost gave my life for ya."

Self-sacrifice was always rather noble in principle. But this was something more than dying for a cause. Members of the Aohi were selfish. People without any remote sense of ethics or morals, so long their choices kept them alive. Yanagi, more than anyone, wouldn't care who died if it meant she would live. She would likely kill him if it meant her safety, and yet—

"Why did you do all of this for me?"

"We had a deal, didn't we?" Yanagi took an irritated drag, "I'd buy your freedom and all ya had ta do was stay alive. Now you ready to go and die stupidly, throwin' everything I did for ya back in my face."

"But what about the Akatsuki? The Grass Village—"

"I said I'd set ya free. I said I'd teach ya to deal with the curse a little better. I never promised ta keep ya by my side."

Sasuke visibly paled. After everything he went through, he thought he at least could rely on Yanagi to be there.

"What are you talking about?" he covered his uncertainty with anger, "But you need me—"

"Need you?" Yanagi echoed, "I'm much stronger than ya, especially now that your body is such a mess. What would I need ya for?"

Yanagi shifted her travel pack against her shoulder and moved past him. Hopefully he would get the picture.

_You've grown strong, Sasuke._

He spun her around and noticed how surprised she managed to look before kissing her.

"What the hell're—" Sasuke cut her off again, holding her upper arms tightly while his mouth was pressed against hers.

"Don't do this to me," he murmured harshly, not letting go, "Don't you dare say you don't need me."

_Don't tell me I'm worthless._

"I'm not going to be left behind again."

_Don't abandon me._

"I can't fix this. But'cha already know that," Yanagi pushed him back just hard enough to put some space between them. She could see the futility in his actions. This wasn't at all about her or the Aohi per say, so much as what that aspect of his life meant to him. She knew what he really wanted to say.

_I don't want to be alone anymore._

"I thought we had a deal, Captain," his fists were shaking at his sides, his eyes kept averted, "I doubt my leaving was part of our agreement."

"They say real freedom," Yanagi paused, heavily contemplating her words for a change, "Is having a place to return to."

"But what does that mean?" he was losing his patience and his temper now.

"You idiot," Yanagi mumbled, "You's already free."

"What are you talking about?" he shouted, "How has anything changed!?"

"Because ya still got someplace to call home!"

Sasuke was just stone-still frozen. Yanagi was actually angry with him right now. She was always so cool about everything, but not now. Then again, she never tried to leave him behind before. Now she stood before him with her fists balled up at her sides and her face all scrunched up to contain her simmering temper. Had he been this much of a burden to her all along?

"But what about you?"

"What about me?" Yanagi smoked leisurely, watching the gray disappear in the blinding sun.

"When will you be free?"

Yanagi turned away from him. She'd already wasted too much time and effort having this cyclical argument with him. "I got only one path in front a' me. I'm off ta fight again."

He encircled her from behind this time. He certainly wasn't handling this with the composure she expected of him. "Stay."

"What?"

"Stay in Konoha," he murmured by her ear, "The Leaf will likely grant you amnesty. You don't need to run anymore. You can--"

"I'm a criminal, Uchiha," Yanagi stated flatly, "I can't unmake my choices in life. I, too, gotta face the consequences and see this through to the end."

Sasuke couldn't hold onto her anymore. There was nothing he could do to make her stop. Anything more and she would likely knock him out flat.

"What am I supposed to do?"

"What else? Go home."

Was it really that simple? Just "go home"? Home to the agony of an empty house, where he would waste his days? Surely Yanagi would be kind enough to let his death be swift and relatively painless on the battlefield.

I don't want to be alone anymore.

"If ya hate bein' indebted ta people so much, what've ya done ta pay her back?"

The jolt from her words almost knocked the wind from him. Of all things, he really didn't think Yanagi would bring that up.

"I was the cause of a lot of grief for her. It's not something to be revisited."

"She almost gave her life for ya, too," Yanagi reminded him, pulling up not so much recent memories but images of a violent hotel room from years ago, "Will you really leave things the way they are?"

"I avenged her. There's nothing more I can do."

"She can save you," Yanagi's words hung heavy in the air, heavier on his mind, "Don't think I didn't notice what happened at the hospital today. You's in debt ta her again."

"I don't know if it was Sakura that made the curse go into recession," Sasuke admitted, denied.

"Ya can't forget about her and ya know it."

Sasuke didn't bother arguing with her. She knew him better than he knew himself. She always had been aware that Sakura could always find her way into his thoughts, despite his best efforts to do away with those memories over the last three years.

"I made a promise. I would help you defeat the curse seal," Yanagi ground out her cigarette, "So go keep your word."

_Don't die._

She could sense his hesitation. The poor, pathetic kid was such an emotional sap sometimes. Now he was approaching from behind again. He always was dense when it came to listening to anything she said—

Yanagi stiffened and reluctantly attempted to relax as she felt something cool secured around her head. Her calloused fingers brushed against the etched metal and cool silk of the forehead protector, causing her to whirl around in question.

"Yanagi," Sasuke extended his hand, "Don't ever change."

She took it with a bit of hesitation and shook back. There was a point in life where both might have clung to the other after a long day of struggling that faded into a drunken, hazy evening. Now the distance between them was swelling. No matter how close, they could never reach each other again the way they once had.

"It's time to live for yourself now, so don't take the freedom I'll give ya for granted, Sasuke."

Yanagi pulled away and Sasuke watched her fade with the Uchiha symbol marking her back as she disappeared into the distance. It wasn't until she was gone and the gates slammed shut that he realized she had finally called him by his first name. It wouldn't be until later in life that he realized she had just vowed to continue her quest to keep her promise.

* * *

Yanagi had only the road before her, only the road that loved her. It was the return to gray skies and mundane battles. Gone was her long-time rival, gone was her long-time companion. The wind was kind enough to kick up the dirt path and cover her skin with ageless dust. She vigorously rubbed her face with the back of her hand as her tears left tracks down her smudged features.

"You's a fool," she choked softly, "You always been a fool."

What troubled her more than anything was by now she could no longer tell if she was crying for him. Or, perhaps, she had been weakened enough by him so that, for the first time in her life, she wept for herself.

* * *

He ran. He couldn't explain the sense of urgency pulsing in his veins. It seemed there was more to it than trying to outrun his sense of loss. Everything he had ever known was gone. The family he loved was dead. The woman that stripped away every ounce of dignity and carefully built wall that surrounded him earned his hard-bought trust. And walked away with it.

He had nothing to fight for anymore and nothing certain to return to. It had been ten years since he last lived without gut-wrenching ambitions. But before that, he had been an ignorant child. Now that everything was over, how was he supposed to just go back? There was nothing familiar anymore. Even if she was waiting for him, she too, was different.

If she was waiting for him.

_I hope you've found your peace._

_I won't forget you._

Sasuke frantically threw open the door to his house and raced in, not caring that it was unlocked. He already knew why it was open. Or so he believed the reason to be. Instincts were funny that way.

The noise startled Sakura and she pulled back from her task, leaving a few stray tears scattering through the air. "Wha—Why-I--" Sakura stuttered.

"What are you doing here?" Sasuke blurted out, his breath a tad ragged after racing back.

"I—Um—" Sakura struggled to compose herself, "I heard they might finally try to sell off the property around here. And I didn't want your things to just get thrown away. So I…"

Sasuke took note of the cardboard box that Sakura had been filling. He vaguely found it amusing that it only took her a few hours to bring herself to this place. Even though he told her it would have been better for her to forget, Sakura took the first chance she had to surround herself with everything that reminded her of him. She always was amazingly stubborn.

"Did—Did you forget something? Supplies?" Sakura tried to make herself seem busy, distant.

"…No."

"Oh…Is Yanagi-san waiting outside?"

"She's gone," Sasuke replied plainly and something twinged inside at the thought.

" 'Gone'?" Sakura echoed, "Where are you meeting her then?"

Sasuke scrounged up a cigarette, hoping it would settle his nerves. The rapid unraveling of his world was enough to make the curse seal burn beneath his skin. Smoking would be a decent distraction for now.

"I'm not meeting up with her," he answered, "She left."

He watched the confusion in her features shift into full bloom. She was a smart girl but had more than enough reason to be skeptical. Why she was even here tending to his things, he just couldn't fathom. She was cynical enough now to actually believe he hadn't intended to return to this place.

"Sasuke-kun?" There it was. The faint sliver of hope glistened in her eyes. Jade eyes. Sakura's eyes.

"I…I'm home," he murmured. Sakura concealed her disbelief behind clasped hands. Was she dreaming? It couldn't be real, could it?

But here stood before her a weary man, one who endured so much pain and hardship. After spending all these years running from home, running from everyone and from himself, he finally had enough. He finally returned to them.

Even in her dazed state, an anxious smile tugged at her lips as she stared up at him. It had been too long.

"Welcome home."

* * *

Both moved through their deep state of numbness, every breath feeling more surreal than the last. Sasuke didn't bother to put up any sort of protest when Sakura suggested he get some rest. He had years to catch up on and, in all honesty, he wasn't all that sure what he was supposed to be doing with his time now anyway. As he stared up at the unchanged ceiling, he couldn't help but be aggravated by the silence, the stillness. There used to be soft breath near his ear and now there was nothing and his bed felt cold. Yanagi really was a bitch right to the very end.

It had been so long since he last _truly_ slept. The nightmares and recollections were still there but the threats were empty. The past was irreversible and his future was too uncertain, so much so that a nightmare could never seem nearly as intimidating. Groggily he awoke to sunshine that blurred in the early morning fog. Had he really slept that long? Not that he was in a rush to be anywhere at the moment, and his body ached as it did on most mornings, but he somehow couldn't lie peacefully in bed even though he finally had the chance.

He stumbled dumbly through his once familiar house, mindlessly rubbing at the curse seal to ease its sting. Combat not included, the curse was always most debilitating first thing in the morning. Making his way towards the kitchen, he could smell freshly cooked fish. Some part of his clouded mind almost believed he's just awoken from the most horrid of dreams and that his mother had breakfast waiting for him.

Entering the room, he found his meal as Sakura poured some tea.

"I thought you might be hungry," she mumbled before she continued to pick at her own food.

"I didn't know you were still here," Sasuke stated plainly. She flinched slightly at the sound of his voice but didn't say anything in return and so Sasuke took his seat in silence. Though somehow he couldn't help but feel guilty, knowing that Yanagi and many other Aohi were starving at this very moment. Grass Village wasn't that far from here. How was the fight going, he wondered. Was the village saved already? Or was it a victory for the Akatsuki? He cut the train of thought off when he felt the seal hum with activity again. It had cooled somewhat when he came into the room but he refused to believe Sakura had anything to do with it. If that were the case, these negative thoughts wouldn't be upsetting the curse as much as they were. Now matter how much conviction Sakura might possess, it couldn't make his rage subside so easily.

"You had a companion by your side through these long years," Sakura spoke up and Sasuke paused in poking dispassionately at his food, "After all that time with someone by your side, I thought it would be lonely for you to wake up alone."

Sasuke set down his chopsticks, obviously dismissing himself.

"I'm sorry—I didn't mean to upset you," Sakura managed to spit out, already cursing herself and her misplaced words. It had been so long since she had even heard her inner voice…

He couldn't outwardly say why he was so angry with her reasoning. Perhaps it was because she was just so perceptive, he realized. But this was his life now, the life he had chosen. Gone was the bottom-of-the-barrel lifestyle he had scraped together for the last three years, which had still been better than the meaningless existence he'd struggled through for the seven previous. This was going to be different, and while unable to attain the dream from before ten years ago, it was supposed to be okay now. Yet it all seemed so impossibly hard.

Guilt aside, he should have at least been allowed to enjoy his hot meal now.

Wordlessly rising from the table, he slapped his hand over the mark with a muttered curse in accompaniment before crouching down again. He carried this curse for five years now and "recession" or not, there was no way his body got off clean after the years of abuse he dragged it through. And yet, somehow, the hurt felt different from before. Somewhat unsubstantial, somewhat unnecessary.

Had he not been at such an overwhelmingly drained state, he wouldn't have been caught off-guard by her approach. Sasuke racked his brain for any words that could drive her away but found himself lacking.

_She can save you._

He may have found a lot of what Yanagi said to be true and full of wisdom, but he was never one to blindly follow anyone. The Captain was an extraordinary human being but was far from infallible. Whatever dues he owed Sakura, he paid by coming back. He was going to stay in Konoha 'til the end of his days, 'til the curse seal ate him whole. It was the best he could do. He knew what Yanagi had implied and that was not something he had in himself to give.

"I know you haven't really had a chance to let things sink in," Sakura's voice was soft by his side, "But I can't sit quietly and watch you torture yourself like this. It—it's okay now…So don't hurt yourself anymore."

She pried his hand out of place and pressed her own palm against the searing flesh. Cursed flesh. Sasuke's flesh. His knee-jerk impulse was to pull away and curse at her for getting near him. If their record was anything of importance to her, she should have remembered how dangerous he could get when she was close. Or so he had been. Her hand rubbed soothingly against the mark and he felt strangely warm, nurtured almost. As if energy were flowing into him, like chakra…

"What are you…"

"My dumb choice wasn't so dumb in the end," her voice tried to maintain the distance, clinical, "The power of the phoenix—It has great healing capabilities, so far as mystical afflictions go. Tsunade-sama says that with a little bit of training, I'll easily surpass what even she can do with that sort of treatment."

_She can save you._

Perhaps infallible was the right word, after all. Somehow Yanagi's instincts let her find the one thing, the one person, who could keep the seal in check. It wouldn't heal completely, and he was sure both Sakura and Yanagi alike must have realized that. But this would be enough to get by. Because he had to survive and keep his promise. And now—

"I don't know what I'm supposed to do now in return," Sasuke admitted grimly, "I'm not accustomed to undeserved kindness."

Sakura's hand paused as she pondered the thought. What could she ever ask of him in return? He survived his mission and was home now. To require anything more of him would be selfish on her part. However…

"Be content with your life," Sakura finally answered, "That's all I could ever ask."

Awkward as it was, he couldn't stop himself from bringing her close into his embrace. "Is it really?" Sasuke's voice was small and uncertain against her shoulder, "Is it really okay now?"

Sakura sounded her affirmation, biting her lip in attempts to hold back her tears as she clung tighter to him. Her fingers wound through his dark hair, memorizing its texture, as this was likely a last time. She wouldn't be so foolish as to get her hopes up again. If she learned anything from Sasuke, it was that his tenderness was always fleeting.

"Sakura," He somehow pressed her closer still, so very faintly trembling against her.

She stiffened in his arms, almost waiting for the dream to end. This calm simplicity was so foreign to both of them, almost to the point of being unsettling. Please don't let me wake.

Feeling a little bolder than was probably of any use to either of them, Sakura leaned forward and pressed her lips against his forehead, her mind swimming when he didn't pull away. His pressed against her back and caused Sakura to unexpectedly flinch, a hiss of suppressed pain sneaking through. Sasuke realized he shouldn't have been surprised as he was. After the hell of fighting and considering how stiff and sore his own body was, it wasn't much of a shock that she likely felt the same.

"My body hasn't adjusted yet," Sakura murmured, "To the seal Kakashi-sensei placed on me."

"Show me."

_Show me how much you changed. Show me how much more you became like me._

"Eh?" Sakura's face flushed. Was he serious? She recalled his ease around Yanagi, clothed or not, and decided that sort of thing probably didn't embarrass him the way it did her. She didn't find any change of expression in his features and accepted that his request was out of genuine curiosity over the seal. It was something he could relate to and that was a rarity in this world. Who was she to deny him such a connection?

Sakura turned away from him, her body burning with shyness as she slipped her dress down to her waist. "I—I'm sure it's not much to look at," Sakura's voice wavered, her hands gripping nervously at her rumpled fabric, "Probably just some scrawled characters or something, huh?" Sakura couldn't speak anymore after his callused fingers brushed against her skin.

"You have wings."

Tattooed into her flesh was a pair of scarlet-feathered wings covering her back. Detailed enough so that it almost appeared that she might spread them and fly away towards that new life she had also been granted after that man's death. Sasuke wondered if he, too, could go to that place with her.

Shivers ran up her spine after Sasuke brushed aside hair from her nape, his breath a warm ghost against her skin. Her body was so exhausted from everything and wanted so desperately to just give in. But they finally reached a crossroad and she could not let such a choice be so readily made.

"Sasuke-kun?" This is the final jumping point. What do you want from this life?

_Who are you doing this for?_

She knew he was now rigid from the unexpected question before he answered. "Isn't this what you wanted?"

"Is this what _you_ wanted?"

The silence drifted back and forth between them, heavy with contemplation. No matter how many years or miles passed, at least the silence remained the same.

"You're free now, Sasuke-kun," Sakura remained steadfast, "Don't do this for me or for Yanagi-san or out of any obligation you feel you have. If it doesn't mean anything to you, then there's no point!"

"I used to think of you, during my time away…" Sasuke begrudgingly admitted, "Because there wasn't anything else pleasant to dwell on."

Her shoulders began to quiver, as they usually did around him. Now matter how strong she became, he could rip down all her carefully crafted defenses with a few words. He really was cruel.

"I hadn't planned on returning here or seeing you again, but I think you must have known that," Sasuke began, his voice a low shaking, "I did a lot of terrible things, some of which you know. Most I'd rather you didn't. And yet you've remained so loyal to me—Almost died because of me and for me. Why are you still so devoted to me?"

"Because our years together as a team were the most fulfilling of my life."

Sasuke took a jolt to the senses, an unaccustomed feeling. He'd always known Sakura had been a little different than the other girls in Konoha that were always screaming their "love confessions" to him when they were younger. But today, her words held such a sharp sincerity to them. Or perhaps today was the first time he ever completely acknowledged their honesty.

"Because you always show that at least a small part of you cares for me, and because your happiness means everything to me."

She turned around meekly to face him, though neither held any awareness in regard to her bare chest. If there was anything in this world Sasuke could rely on, it was her eyes. Her chin wobbled as she tried to be strong in front of him, but he wasn't noticing her faults or strengths. Only her devotion.

"Because I could never forget the way you feel."

It takes years to build a city. It takes moments to topple it.

Sakura made no protests when he scooped her up into his arms and had no more arguments when his mouth found hers. Stumbling blindly and entangled to his room, the world faded away and the bottom dropped out. It was a frightening experience, to take that dive. The phantom fears that plagued both their minds were fresh wounds that almost made this moment seem too impossible. Was his mission finally over? Was he here to stay? Was it safe to get close to her, after everyone else had been taken away from him?

She stared up at him quizzically, her hair spread around her and her sweat-slicked skin holding a slight flush. Her eyes searching his, asking the same questions as he did, and most of all wondering if she were dreaming. He found his way inside, etching her look of wonderment into his mind. He leaned in just above her face, trying to absorb all she was through the look in her eyes. "Sakura," he murmured, "I'm home."

Her hands caressed his skin, the nails grazing across now and again. In the gentlest of touches, she could feel his thoughts. In the simplest of phrases, she could hear his confession. And suddenly, this house no longer felt so cold. Nor did his heart.

There was no longer a lost soldier and a girl that made foolish, desperate choices. There was no longer an abandoned child and a lovesick idealist. There was only a man and a woman.

"Welcome home."

And that was enough.

* * *

She lost track of how much time had passed. The days had been filled with muddy trenches and she could taste blood in her liquor and even the piss stank of death. Her fellow crewmembers objected to her continuing active duty, now that she had not an ounce of meat on her weary bones. She imagined months had passed, or even more believable, over a year. But being the stubborn fool she was, she took it straight to the end. Now those days were gone and not a single person connected to the Akatsuki was left alive on this damned earth.

The soldiers were already talking of the "glory days" over a few pints and reminiscing of a time when they actually had a purpose. With everything said and done, just what exactly were they supposed to do? They weren't so ignorant as to see the cancellation of the execution orders as anything but tenuous, at best. When prompted with what their plans as a group should be, their captain gave a lopsided and borderline grin over the rim of her mug. She, of course, told them to live their own way and to not feel obligated to stick around if they could find a better deal, especially one without cockroaches in their beds.

They weren't really that happy with such a choice. They didn't have anything to go back to and needed the Aohi to be their home. And what of her? There was just one final piece of business she needed to clear up. They could make plans for all the adventures they could handle when she returned. Then they could try to find their place in the world. With a final wave of her hand, she exited the bar and towards the road of her most important mission.

* * *

It led her to the place she was standing before now. To be honest, she had almost expected something a little more luxurious or foreboding. Though the rumor said Itachi had been much stronger than the man waiting inside. She brushed aside some rain-slicked strands of hair and drew her sword. Here's to promises.

He looked towards the general direction of the noise with mild irritation. What exactly were those idiots doing at this time of night? The door to his bed chamber flew open and in stumbled a figure shadowed by the lightning and candlelight.

"O—Orochimaru-sama…" a guard choked as blood spewed profusely from his mouth before he hit the ground. In return, Orochimaru only raised an eyebrow over the display. Well this was certainly an unexpected turn of events, though perhaps with those mercenaries picking off all those other rogue ninja, it had only been a matter of time before someone else dared to be stupid enough to show up here.

"They say you don't use any jutsu now."

The voice was rough, female coming from the doorway. Her silhouette betrayed a slight and likely bedraggled figure. "And what of it?" he questioned with a hint of amusement. She seemed quite the interesting little fool.

"Good. Neither do I."

Finally in range of the firelight, he found his curiosity piqued by the Konoha headband so brazenly bound in place. He really hadn't expected them to send a team into his own domain. And judging by her likely age, he had the sneaking suspicion she was not a Leaf ninja by any means.

"Hmm, a mercenary?"

"Somethin' like that," she lit a cigarette off the candle flame.

"What brings you here, my dear?"

"You remember a kid named Uchiha?"

Oh, so _that's_ who this was. He'd heard that a few years ago, his prized Sasuke had wormed his way into the rankings with the infamous "Immortal," as they called her. And this must be that very same young woman. How very intriguing.

"If ya don't mind, I didn't come ta talk," she bluntly announced. Ah, it didn't seem he minded the proposition of a good ol' fight, either. And for someone who's arms were supposedly rendered useless, he certainly wasn't going down as simply as she anticipated. Maybe she was getting old.

But after all the research she'd done to prepare of this assassination, no one had been thoughtful enough to tell her that his sword "Kusanagi" actually shot out of his mouth. Jammed through her chest right up to the hilt, a spray of crimson doused the room from the ugly wound. Orochimaru carelessly yanked the blade out and stepped back to admire his work, not expecting her to be alive and certainly not capable of getting a strong grip on his hair. His sword had just been retracted and all the speed and all the talent in the world wouldn't make it fly out fast enough before she removed his head clean from his shoulders.

This was a new kind of hurt, she realized. She stumbled with terrible urgency through the corridors and out the door and into the rain. Every second was soaked in agony as she felt the shadows creeping up around her. After all her hard work, she really hadn't thought it would all end so stupidly. This man wasn't even her enemy. And yet she came of her own accord, out of a sense of duty to see things through to the end.

Every warrior innately knew that if you lived by the blade, you died by the blade. It was just the way things worked. But after all the lives she took, they always seemed to go so quickly. But here she was with doubled over on her knees in the pouring rain vomiting all over the ground, her voice raking her throat to shreds. It was a horrendous experience. She didn't want it to be long. She didn't want it to hurt. She didn't want to die in such a place.

Collapsing back against part of a stone wall that still stood, Yanagi fished out a cigarette and enjoyed the familiarity of it between her lips. She raised her face skyward and let the rain embrace her; the final touch from another old friend.

And when old friends came to mind, she couldn't stop herself from recalling him. From recalling both of them, really. Those stupid brothers.

"I would've liked to have one more drink with you."

* * *

Epilogue: The Letters I Never Sent

We should have known something happened that night. Something made him wake in a cold sweat with a terrifying jolt, gasping for air like a drowning victim. His nightmares had become somewhat infrequent and never so petrifying. Without even so much as a curse, he sped down the hall into the bathroom and held on for dear life to the corner of the sink, trying frantically to splash water on his fevered face. Luckily I was there to catch him before he hit the floor with convulsions that bordered on a seizure. I couldn't recall a time in the last few months that I had been so afraid.

"It's gone," he whispered as he calmed into light shakes and clung to me for what must have been hours. It wasn't until the next morning that we concluded without a doubt that the curse seal was gone. Not a recession of any kind, it had disappeared entirely. The unexpected loss had sent his body into shock not so dissimilar from a junkie's withdrawal. Those first couple of days was the hardest but, like a tornado, its signs just vanished completely into thin air.

Relief was our next state, knowing that the only way it could have left was with the death of Orochimaru. I had the slightest of worries that he would no longer want me by his side since I no longer needed to tend to his curse. Those doubts, too, shifted into relief as his affections towards me were not deterred by the change. Though, perhaps, we should have been on our guard for the other news.

A week and some days had passed since the seal was deactivated when it arrived on our doorstep. There was nothing formal or special about the token at first glance. An object hastily wrapped in rice paper had the name "Uchiha" scrawled in what appeared to be a child's penmanship. The item inside was a Konoha headband with a few splotches of old blood crusted on the metal. Sasuke dropped the rice paper.

Uchiha was the only word that woman ever learned to write.

Things haven't been the same since that day. His feelings for me have not faded and he can still find a natural smile when in good company. But in the subtle, I can see the change.

He dreams of her still, I think, and sometimes I find myself jealous. Not in the fact that she is on his mind and partly in his heart, but that she was simply so remarkable a person. I hadn't known her well at all and he rarely spoke of her in any of our time together but I envy her strength in some ways. Though he reminds me that I am me and that in itself is beautiful enough. I am what he wants me to be without having to change myself to fit those needs.

But on those nights when he cannot escape all she was for him and all she was able to change for him, I watch him from a distance. He chooses usually to sit in an open windowsill, despite that it's usually raining on these days. He smokes quietly and indulges in good sake, making a silent offering in her name. More likely than anything else, I imagine he is pondering all the other words she never could write to him. I wonder what she would say?

* * *

_Uchiha,_

_You're a free man capable of leading the dream life that haunted you during our time together. You can't unlive your life or take back your actions. There's never been a definite right or wrong in any of this so take it all in stride and relish it. So long as you've got a meal in your belly, a roof over your head, and that woman who loves you despite everything you've done and everything you didn't do, you've succeeded. No matter how many scars you earn, there's no such thing as failure unless you lay down. But I know I taught you better than to do somethin' like that. So long as you're at peace now, none of this was a waste._

* * *

The Konoha Memorial is something of sacred importance to the Leaf shinobi, for there is no greater honor than at the end of your days to have your name inscribed upon that stone. Now a new hero has found her place. She never learned how to write her own name. She was never even someone you could say was pretty. But Yanagi was gracefully carved there, for no one could ever remember a woman who lived more beautifully than she. She followed her path to the end and found her way back to Uchiha, because wherever he lived was home for her.

And that was good enough.

_Fin_

* * *

Author's Notes: I'll start off first by thanking anyone who supported this fic. It was my first shot at fan fiction and it was also an experimental writing style for me, at that. So some of it was pretty good, some of it was a little weird. But now that I finally revised it, I can't really say that it's terrible...

I ended up using Yanagi, a character I've had in my head for an original (non-ninja) story and wanted to try fleshing out her character in this as Sasuke's support. I hadn't expected her to be such a monster of a character. I thought about cutting her out since I don't care for most OCs, but then decided I wanted to try something else. What if I were to take a series of ideas considered "awful and cliche" in fan fiction and breathe new life into them? I used an OC, I had Sakura attacked by Itachi (as twisted as that was), I did a time jump, there was drinking/smoking, etc. But I wanted to prove a point that these are great ideas when used effectively. It seems like most writers here on either put very little effort, grow very lazy with their work, or post every last scrap they've written. I've been writing for a long time now and must have a word count approaching half a million words that will never see the light of day. I'm a huge language dork so unless it's rather good, I don't show it to anyone. So you'll never see a "I know this sucks but read it" statement from me. I know it's hard to find quality writing out there so I definitely don't want to add to the sea of bad writing. I'm far from a perfect writer, but I think I learned a lot from working on this piece.

Despite poor health, I am currently trying to complete a prequel to this story entitled "The Second Birth." It's an attempt to explore the relationship between Itachi and Yanagi, though it would have to disregard the current manga chapters…I hope someday to write another epic about the current manga events.

Hope you enjoyed this. Thanks for putting up with the neverending chapter.

Mizerable


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